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Original poster

Would you leave an exclusively breastfed 7 month old for two nights?

101 replies

ukaway · 19/06/2025 10:46

I booked a weekend away for DP & I a while ago. DD will be 7 months old, she’s breastfed & I’ve only been away from her once for around 12 hours, where I left her with DP and she was fine.

She’s 4 months old at the moment & whilst I’ve been looking forward to it, as it’s getting closer I’m starting to dread being away from her. She’s very cautious around anyone who is not me or DP & often works herself up crying if either of our families even try to interact with her.

I could really do with getting away and I’ve paid quite a bit but the thought of her being unsettled has left me feeling it would be selfish of me to go. We’d be leaving around lunchtime on the Friday & returning on the Sunday afternoon, it’s a 3 hour drive each way.

I’m could change the dates, although I’d have to pay an additional £300 I believe. I’m not even sure if she’d be a bit more settled in 3 months time & on solids too. I think if I knew that she was happy being looked after, I’d be able to relax myself.

Would you go in these circumstances?

OP posts:
SouthLondonMum22 · 19/06/2025 19:41

There's still time to work on leaving her with who would be looking after her and gradually build up to an overnight stay and see how she does.

It sounds like you could use the break and there's absolutely nothing wrong with considering your needs too.

Howdoyouwait · 19/06/2025 19:42

Absolutely. Mine is 6m now, at 4 months was fussy with anyone else but now is much happier. She’s always done a mix of breast and bottle, with some days being exclusively bottle fed for various reasons and though I haven’t yet left her overnight I’d be confident that she’d be okay. If you’re happy to do it I’d probably do a test of one night at around 5/6 months and see how it goes.

Doingmybest12 · 19/06/2025 19:56

Sounds like you booked it before knowing how you might feel. If you don't want to leave her then don't, if you do then work on her being more flexible about feeding and staying with others and she'll likely be fine. Really it's just about how you feel about leaving your baby and the ebf is a red herring.

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Wildefish · 19/06/2025 20:01

ukaway · 19/06/2025 10:53

She’s always taken a bottle if offered, formula & expressed milk but aware this could change closer to the time.

@SeelineThats a good point, thank you!

If you’re going to do it as someone said get the person who is looking after her to be giving her bottles regularly from now. I’m a childminder and I had an 11 month old breast fed baby who refused to take any food or bottle (mums milk) from me.

Yogabearmous · 19/06/2025 20:02

Snoodley · 19/06/2025 10:50

Only if they reliably take a bottle and are happy with the person they'd be left with.

This

StevieNic · 19/06/2025 20:13

I wouldn’t leave any 7 month old for 2 nights, unless I was in hospital. I think the baby would be quite distressed without their primary caregiver. But I feel like people do leave their babies all the time so perhaps I’m over the top.

August1980 · 19/06/2025 20:14

Mine is 7 months old at the moment and I won’t leave her. She is very social and content baby and will go to anyone and I still won’t leave her! Pay the money, change the date or take her with you!

Tryonemoretime · 19/06/2025 20:36

I didn't leave ours overnight until they were around 4 or 5 as they'd have been unhappy (me, too). But in that era we were encouraged to start feeding a little mashed banana etc at 4 months (still mainly milk, though) and our babies were guzzling our pureed dinners by 6 months (no salt at all).

HiCandles · 19/06/2025 20:51

Wouldn't have been possible here. My breastfed DD fed overnight at 7m just the same as she did at 4m, ie more or less every couple of hours. We cosleep to cope with it. You'd have to pump several times through the day and night for comfort and to protect your supply. When I was exclusively pumping with DS at 7m that was 5 times a day, fyi. You'll have to give bottles regularly between now and then, like every 2-3 days, to prevent baby going off them. You'll have to think about how the caregivers will get baby to sleep if you usually feed to sleep - even if reliably dropping off in sling or buggy now, there's no guarantee that will be the case at 7m as babies change so quickly, and not always in a way that makes life easier. Most 7m nap 3 times a day.

In short, I'd definitely take baby with you. A 7m is easy to look after, they're not moving much, are entertained in a highchair for ages with a few finger foods and can be sling carried for long countryside walks.

Blondeshavemorefun · 19/06/2025 20:59

If you want to go then go and enjoy but

your dd needs to take the bottle every day once /twice a day till you go so it’s not a new thing for her and also ideally needs to interact with more friends and family so that she is happy not being with you

you can express so your supply doesn’t stop

I work nights and was back to work at 17w due to being se and needed the money tho dd was happy taking the bottle plus by then will generally sleeping all night

if your dd wakes in The night maybe dh needs to give her a bottle so that if she wakes when you Arne there , who had her will be able to feed her easily

knor · 19/06/2025 21:16

It’s only your call OP. 7 months does feel a bit young.
could you change it to 1 night?
could you start practicing with family members (who will have the baby will you’re away) - go out for a few hours, see how it goes. Think it’s important to build up to it rather than just leave for 2 days.

bumblebeedum · 19/06/2025 21:17

No I wouldn’t. But I know plenty of people that have, for longer & further. Will you enjoy it if you’re already feeling anxious?

Artmumcreative · 19/06/2025 22:39

No I wouldn't go. I have a one year-old who's on solid food and still breastfeeds to get to sleep/if upset/for general comfort. I suspect your supply will drop a lot or even stop. I know someone that was expressing so her husband could do the night feeds, she stopped lactating.

Original poster
ukaway · 19/06/2025 23:01

Thanks all, just reading through now! Not sure if it’s typical for her age but she is quite timid around people. She’s absolutely fine in restaurants or shops, it just tends to be if anyone, other than me or DP, attempts to pick her up or even gets too close to look at herBlush She’ll also nuzzle into DP or I, turning her face away, if someone talks to her.

My family live around an hour away & DP’s 45 minutes. We probably see them all twice a month or so but DD seems to forget who they are inbetween visits.

@GiveDogBoneTo be fair, I’ve not had much of a reason to be away from her.

OP posts:
MrsdMrsIMrsffi · 19/06/2025 23:39

I wouldn’t leave her no way!
take her with you

IstanbulBaby · 19/06/2025 23:44

Sorry but no way

AnonMJ · 20/06/2025 00:03

Who are you leaving her with?
i EBF both kids for 4 years each.

I went away for a long weekend whem DC1 was 5mo. Left him with dad for 3 nights.

was awesome.

DC2 was 8mo and I ended up leaving them for 5 nights. Again with dad.

I had a fabulous time.

if you are leaving her with trusted family all will be well.

my OH didn’t tell me for a year that actually that first trip away from DC1 was tricky.

if DC2 was equally tricky he never mentioned it.

I had a lovely time and they were all pleased to see me when I got home!!!!!!

so just make sure you are leaving her with someone you trust. Who loves you as well as her.

have a lovely time. I would go!!! (Both kids went on to bf for many years after that weekend away! There were other weekends away too. Highly recommend!!!)

Lovehascomeandgone · 20/06/2025 05:18

No I wouldn’t leave them, I would take them.

Cherrytree86 · 20/06/2025 08:52

I would cancel or postpone rather than take the baby…it will just be a substandard spa experience for you and you’ll feel cheated .

Willyoujust · 20/06/2025 09:37

I left my son at 6 months old for three nights with grandparents. I had a great time but not on the last night as I was really missing him and wanted to get home. He had a great time with Nanny and Grandad! I think you should go for it!

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 20/06/2025 10:06

Emonade · 19/06/2025 18:05

Why is leaving a seven month old good for them?

Show quote history

That's my personal opinion.

I had to go back to work at 7 months and feeding issues aside, having a child who was comfortable by then being cared for by my husband and childcare made that separation easier for her and vastly easier for me. We never had the clingy phase and she happily went off to nursery and school when the time came. Long term I don't see any attachment issues though my children are hardly a representative sample of every child.

Assuming the OP has plenty of family or paid support and does not have a deadbeat husband, it is in my opinion [which you may not share] that regular short absences when they are little, builds a better foundation and a more well adjusted child in the event there is a forced or unplanned separation as happens from time to time. Even the simplest things, like visiting a very unwell parent/grandparent become a trial if you can bring a totally attached baby/small child with you.

However, 7 months is tricky. The OP wishes to continue to BF and will be feeding 4/5 times a day either bottle or breast still at 6 months. There's quite a lot of planning and a lot of time spent with a 3rd person [as her husband will be on the trip too] doing feeds, play and bed times to adjust to a 2 day absence in a way that they all will have a good weekend without upset. If it's a grandparent that's planned, there's also the likely assumption on their side that they know exactly what they are doing right up to the point that solo charge for 48 hours looms and beyond basic care, practice in actually entertaining a child of that age is a bit "what do I do with them? " moment.

Dstoat · 20/06/2025 10:44

Only if you keep going with the bottles. All my breasted babies started refusing them from about 6 months. Personally I wouldn’t leave a baby that young. She will be a toddler before you blink.

CatsnCoffee · 20/06/2025 12:16

How far away are you going? If absolutely necessary could you return home relatively quickly? That said, I still wouldn’t have been happy to have done it with any of mine.
It’s not just about milk and taking a bottle. She’s used to the closeness of being held by you to feed and fall asleep.
Even if you could return home quickly, would relatives/friends/whoever is looking after her call you or just try to push on through, causing her unintended stress?
Any chance of deferring your trip to a different date at no extra cost or only a small fee? You’d enjoy the time more, knowing she was better able to be separated from you?

Gossipisgood · 23/06/2025 12:45

If you really want to go try preparing little one by expressing milk & giving it to her in a bottle instead of direct from the breast. Also try & see your family or whoever is going to be looking after her while you're away more often so baby is familiar with them & will feel more settled & comfortable. Ask them to babysit for a couple of hours here & there so your DD gets used to being with them on her own & them giving her a bottle. If you do decide to go take your breast pump with you & express as much as you can so your supply doesn't dry up & means you can carry on breast feeding until you feel ready to stop. If you decide to take her with you make sure you & DP get some time together while she's asleep & try to enjoy your break.

LouiseK93 · 29/06/2025 01:28

A baby less than a year old...don't go. You will spend your whole time away worrying about her.
You will get your time, honest :)
I couldn't leave my DD until she completely stopped BF and could speak so she could tell whoever was looking after her what she wants/needs.

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