DH wants me to have a boob job.

[BillieGi]

Sounds bad but let me explain.

He keeps offering to pay for a boob job for me next year when he recieves a sum of money.

I'm early 40s and we have been together over 15 years.

When we first got together I was a little B cup and he loved my figure. I had my children and with my first pregnancy I grew to a DD cup and never went back down. He loved my figure.
With breast feeding and pregnancy things went a little south but I still liked my big boobs and felt confident.

I gained 100lbs due to pregnancies, illness and MH issues. My breasts went to an F cup. He loved my figure and whilst I hated being so overweight I still felt confident and sexy because of my breast, I felt in proportion still.

I have now lost 120lbs and i have very little breast tissue and am extremely saggy in the chest area. HE STILL LOVES MY FIGURE.

He has never, ever made a negative comment about my body or weight.

But I do not love my figure. I hate it. I cannot bear to be naked in front of him for the first time in my life. I cover myself up. I insist on a bra at all times. Even whilst I sleep because if I wear a tshirt or vest my nipples almost touch the bottom of my ribcage.

Our sex life is suffering because of my breasts. He still reacts to me the same way as when i was 25, or 30 or 35 but its ME that can't accept my new body.

So he wants me to get a boobjob so I feel confident and sexy again because I really have just shut down, I know he fancies me just as much as ever but I can't relax during sex at all. I can't take my bra off. He can't touch me there or anything. Its not just emotional but physical, the feeling of having my bra off and the way they feel during sex is off putting.

My question is, is it too late at 40 for this?

I would 100% need an uplift which is putting me off as it seems like a big surgery with a lot that could go wrong. Also general anesthetic etc.. and the money! That could be a big chunk of money in the kids savings or put towards a car etc.

Has anyone had an uplift and implants at this age and been happy with the results?

I remember a long-running thread on here for women who had a breast reduction; I think it was an AMA. Have a look through this as the questions/advice/experience will be more relevant than from those who have a simple implants procedure.

Yes I was going to suggest editing the title because I was expecting a much different post based on that.

Addressing your OP concerns specifically:

Are you too old at 40? No.

It's a big operation. Yes, but a routine one. It does mean you need to do research though.

Money. You could spend the money on other things, of course. But would any of them make you happier than the surgery? See it as an investment in yourself and ultimately your relationship. Would a car give you the same 'return on investment'?

Go and do the research and speak to surgeons. They will be able to give you an idea of what to expect. You aren't obliged to go ahead at that point but you will need to do this anyway if you are going to have the surgery. So do something tangible towards making the decision, rather than agonising in your head.

Why not?! Go for it!!! I would say to explore having some of the breast skin removed and the breast muscles tightened, instead of implants. I know a few who couldn't afford to have them replaced 10 years later. Over time they harden and can cause pain/discomfort. If you do have implants, make sure you'll have the money to replace them as they only last so long.

I think you should do it. I had one thing about my body that I hated. I got it fixed, and I felt so much better. That was nearly 10 years ago and I'm so glad I did it. If you have the money, do it.

If I had spare money I'd invest it in therapy to learn to accept my body. As you age things wil change. There's nothing wrong with getting a boob job if that's what you want, but imo you're better off addressing the root of how you feel rather than chasing surgeries.

I am unhappy. I thought losing the weight would make me so confident but its absolutely killed any confidence I had.

Please read this again. Imagine if the same thing is happening.

Why not book a consultation and go from there ? 40 definitely isn't too old for breast implants/ lift if that's what you want. Life's too short to be miserable over something that you have the finances to fix

He subliminally telling you your boobs aren’t good enough. It’s a shame he can’t learn to appreciate you as you are post children and weight loss.

You want to have a boob job. I say go for it.
You’ll feel great.

Did you not read the OP?!?!? Did you just read the title and then immediately post? 🤦🏻‍♀️

Oh, I would do it! I had a boob job about 20 years ago. I went from an AA cup to a C/D cup, and my confidence soared. I had the teardrop shape, so they look really natural. They still look fab 20 years later.

We’re subliminally telling you to read the effing OP before commenting.

If I was in your position I would do it for sure. You are only 40 - do it! The current situation has ruined your self confidence and understandably so - bet you feel awesome with a new confident lease of life after.

How recent is the weight loss OP ? Because after weight loss and as you go through your forties fat does redistribute, and you may well find your breasts fill out a bit again. I would give it a bit of time post weight loss for your skin to adjust too, then if that isn’t enough for you to feel more comfortable, then make a choice as to how you want to proceed.
I am quite anti cosmetic surgery generally but if something is making you miserable over a long time period and having an impact on other areas of your life, then I feel slightly differently. I know a few people who have had fairly minor (one off) surgery for this reason.

Have you not paid attention to what OP is saying !!!!!
Sometimes things just aren’t that deep !
She doesn’t have internal issues about her body , she hates her boobs after losing a lot of weight , that’s all ! !
She wants to feel her usual sexy self with her husband & what’s wrong with that , he just wants her to be happy in herself again ! It’s irritating here reading posts such as yours , making out there is this deep seated reason for OP wanting boob job when there really is not ….

Go for it!!

I think 40 is the perfect age. If you really want one then go ahead.

I want one when I’m done with kids cuz breastfeeding absolutely kills them :(

I went from a 38H in pregnancy, to losing 8 stone in weight and I was left with boobs that I hated. I was suddenly slimmer than I’ve ever been and yet felt so self conscious of my chest and all the loose skin!

I had a breast augmentation and uplift 3 months ago, aged 37 - no regrets at all!

Of course you aren’t too old. I had mine done several years ago and they look awesome.

In your position, I would 100% do this. And I'm 50. I reckon I'd have it done if I was in your position and 60 as well.

Have you had an MRI to check them? It's advised after so long as they are probably getting towards the end of their life.

Remember OP it's not just about one operation if you get implants, they are likely to need replacing at some time and can you imagine having to do that in your 60's or 70's if they rupture or you get capsular contracture? It's not a route I'd go down, I'd be having sex with the lights off to begin with and starting to get used to having sex with them as they are.

Are you happy with the scarring? I need an uplift but the scars scare me as I can’t see any photos of the scars a few months/years on. Just immediately after surgery

My friend was in a very similar situation to you body wise and she’s had it done. Her breasts are bloody fantastic now! She went for a D cup and looks awesome. She doesn’t always need a bra now either. If I didn’t love her I’d hate her! 😆

My niece had boob job including uplift when she was 42 - best thing she ever did for her own body confidence! Go for it!