I've just spent a few days at new man's parents' house

[Curlybook]

They've been lovely, nothing too much trouble and the house is beautiful, spotless, but soo uncomfortable.

Nothing is there to be nice to use. The beds are nice looking wooden frames with saggy mattresses, the sofa has wooden arms and is impossible to sit on unless you sit up straight, even garden furniture has no cushions and the shower doesn't have a handheld bit so is awkward to use.

I've come home to my slightly shabby and untidy house glad to be able to curl up on the sofa.

Do you think they find it uncomfortable too?

Hi gran

@charabang , if you travel to other countries, you'll find all manner of different experiences. It would be boring if we were all the same!

My parents house is a bit like this. They seem to have a talent for choosing expensive but ugly and uncomfortable furniture. Which they then try to tell us they like for years until they eventually concede defeat and admit that we are right, but then go and replace with the same sort of thing. Bizzare. But their house I suppose.

Taste is subjective. I think people having everything grey or beige is ugly, but that's their choice.

PIL have a holiday home in the south of France. It’s their pride and joy. But they have never seen the need to update it to the modern world - aubergine corner bath, no dishwasher, awful mattresses and miniature duvets. And it’s in the middle of nowhere; you have to drive miles to get a loaf of bread. There’s one mediocre restaurant in the nearest town or it’s a major expedition to eat out. The only activity/place to visit that isn’t a full day excursion is an abbey - admittedly lovely, but when you’ve seen it you’ve seen it.

They could never understand why we didn’t want to spend all our holidays there, and would complain that they’d bought it as a place all their family could enjoy.

@VenusClapTrap it's in the South of France. Is there literally nothing to enjoy?
The colour aubergine and lack of dishwasher wouldn't bother me, I'd just love to get out and explore, enjoy the countryside and discover the villages.

Jesus Fucking Christ
I hope he is now your ex

😂😂
What about those bastard in laws who invite people to their place in the South of France where they have had the temerity to use aubergine as an interior design colour?!
It gets more and nore outrageous....

Ex's parents had us round for lunch one Sunday. Quite a well to do family for a Sunday roast dinner. I'd heard all about her legendary Yorkshire puddings so I was looking forward to that being the highlight.
We sat down to dinner, strangely being given a sherry first to accompany the meal.
She then gives us a small side plate for our "starter" of a large dry Yorkshire pudding on its own.
I discreetly told my ex once she had left the room that I thought it would come alongside the meal as it would be a little dry.
He said "Oh no they don't do that, my Mum is a true 'Yorkshire lass' this is how we always eat it. You can have some gravy on it?"
I drowned it in gravy and had a mixture of soggy and crunchy which kept trying to ping itself off the small side plate when I cut in to it! 😂

It’s mostly farm land and vineyards in their area. It’s pretty, but as it’s mostly private land, exploring is limited. Everything is a long drive away. Which is fine if you just want to sit on the terrace and enjoy the view, and self cater, but when I’m choosing a holiday it’s not my first choice.

In-laws think that because it’s their idea of holiday heaven, it must be everyone else’s. They think my holiday choices of enjoying restaurants and cafes, people watching and wandering round historic villages are something you do once during a fortnight’s holiday, not every day. And if I’m choosing a holiday in the south of France, I want to be on the coast, not 1.5 hours inland.

I'm happy to go every once in a while, I don't hate it, but not every single holiday, no. But the pressure and disappointment from them is a bit relentless.

Plus my comment about the aubergine bathroom suite - point is it was installed in the seventies (by the previous owners, not the in-laws choice). Ie half a century ago. I just don’t want to spend all my holidays somewhere so dated.

It's traditional to have Yorkshire pudding and gravy as a starter though, to fill you up so you don't need as much meat. We grew up always having it that way (Yorkshire family) and I still prefer it.

So, you wouldn't holiday in the South of France because of the dated decor in the in laws property?

Yes, I've had it like that before. It's interesting to see other people's customs, I always think.

I think you can usually tell the difference (at least, I can), however it doesn't necessarily mean that they're not delicious.

No, I wouldn’t spend all my holidays in my in-laws dated house in the middle of nowhere 1.5hrs inland in the South of France. Occasional holidays, yes. Holidays in more comfortable accommodation in a more interesting part of the South of France, yes.

The spare room mattress they probably just haven't slept on themselves ever!

As an aside, there were some sofas and armchairs with wooden arms in my xILs holiday home in Europe, that they had since the 80s. They were so comfortable! The cushions were velour covered and a really good supportive shape. You could still curl up at one end of the sofa if you used a cushion!

Ok. It's just interesting for me to travel, and I'm not fussed about decor, but we're all different.
I remember travelling in India where some of the colours would freak you out! Fantastic experience, though.
At one point I slept on matting!

I’m a vegetarian foreigner who doesn’t ‘get’ Yorkshire puddings at all, but this is the traditional way to eat them. They were served with gravy as a first course to fill people up before the meat course. That’s the whole point of cheap starches, as traditional money-savers.

@ExceedinglyCharacteristic - you're absolutely right, that's exactly what it's about.
I remember staying in a small town in Russia and they gave us potato dumplings to start with, it served the same purpose.

I did too. I loved backpacking round India in my twenties. Stayed in some really, really basic places and it was wonderful. But now I’m in my fifties I wouldn’t do that. Not when I can stay in more comfort. Nor would I go back to exactly the same location year in year out, because there’s a whole world out there to see. It’s not about decor.

Yes, for me it's never been about the decor! 😂
Otherwise I certainly wouldn't have stayed in the former Soviet Union, East Germany, India, Malaysia or rural Eastern Europe!
Like you, I prefer comfort now, but people's choice of colour certainly doesn't bother me, even though wouldn't care to sleep on matting anymore!

You really are.
Did you ask them if they were comfortable?

Did you ask your DP if he thinks they're comfortable or if he is?
No you didn't did you?

After making you so welcome, you come on here to criticise them.

My PILs have an uncomfortable house. Two small sofas that you have to sit upright on (no feet up on sofas… the horror). Plus The Big Light is always on.
A twin room for me and DH with bobbly sheets Cane furniture in the conservatory with no upholstered element bar a small cushion where one bum cheek would land.
Theres nothing ‘comfy’ there at all.

Great thread. I like my in laws house, it’s comfortable and they are happy for you to relax there. But they have really questionable ideas about refrigeration. For example, keeping cooked meat in the (cold) oven until the next day.

in turn, they can’t believe I like my vegetables crunchy. Or not out of a can.