Perimenopause- how do you not kill your DH/DP because mine is getting on every last one of my nerves

[saltwater1985]

His snoring
The way he does obnoxiously loud sneezes
His slight beer belly
The way he washes up

Honestly I could just walk out at any time.
Is this permanent?!
Just started HRT for facial flushes and hoping the irritability will subside a little 😬😬

I’ve reached this stage too @HRTQueen I am really enjoying it. It’s a blessed liberation.

I don’t know how married women stick it out. What’s the point once the DC leave home and your husband’s breathing makes you feel murderous?

Mouth breathing

Have you tried Ashwagandha and magnesium? A game changer for me. Everything got on my nerves but, now I’m a lot calmer

I did, asked for a separation. Then I realised it was Peri doing the thinking and talking. I felt awful. He isn't that bad. Sometimes. We're still together, hanging on, well just about.

I'm too preoccupied dealing with the awful peri physical symptoms. There's plenty to keep me busy.

Please be careful with ashwagandha and make sure you know about the potential side effects and problems with other medications - one friend had serious liver damage in her 50s, another in her 40s ended up with nasty interactions with her other prescribed meds.

https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-953/ashwagandha

Maybe dose the men with something instead to make them less intolerable

Thinking back now it must have been perimenopause (i assumed it was PMT) but I remember sitting in the car in the Tesco car park screaming down the phone at DH that I wasn’t going to talk to the mobile phone provider woman. The incredulous rage I felt that he would even think I’d do this made me feel like smashing my own face in. GP put me on the mini pill to help with the PMT and now I’m post menopause I’m on anti depressants. I’m able to take things more in my stride now but I still feel unreasonable irritation quite often

Far from it. I’m 48 and on HRT.

I don’t like this dangerous idea that any feelings a woman has during the 5-10 years around menopause are ‘invalid’ or ‘just hormones.’ People don’t have to put up with relationships they don’t enjoy because they’re ‘temporarily mad.’ It’s all so misogynistic

Oh and by the way I split with my husband and now live blissfully happily alone with my daughter. Honestly. I can’t ever imagine even contemplating living with a man again. It seems alien to me, like, ‘what, why would I ever have done that.’ Oh yeah, the biological urge for children. Once that’s gone. They’re pointless to me in a romantic sense

I find my DH funny, charming, kind, interesting and sexy...but living alone is my no 1 biggest fantasy. It's weird. I enjoy his company so much and we're textbook 'happily marrieds' but ohmygod sometimes I just want to scream FUCKOFFANDLEAVEMEALONEFOREVEROHMYGODFUCKOFF.

This morning we out for a lovely coffee and cake, strolling along the beach in the sunshine hand-in-hand, chatting away about our summer plans. We're back home now and he's just called upstairs to ask me if I want a glass of wine outside in the garden. And I feel unreasonably furious about that. How fucking DARE HE? FORFUCKSSAKENOOFCOURSEIDONTWANTAGLASSOFWINEWHATTHEACTUALFUCKDOYOUMEAN???

I do feel sorry for him because he literally does nothing wrong. I'm just wildly irritated 50% of the time. We do spend a lot of time together though and I think that's part of it. Poor guy 😂

Yeah that doesn’t sound nice behaviour on your part. If it were the other way round I’d call it abusive if someone offered a drink and got a mouthful of ‘fuck off’ back

This seems to be unpopular opinion to some but my GP put me on fluoxetine for the rage. I was literally angry at everything and everyone. I was getting quite scared I would actually do someone harm. It sorted it out and then I was left with other menopausal symptoms (anxiety) which I now take HRT for. The combination of both now has me on an even keel.

Yes, none of us are entitled to this rage, if men raged like this we ld expect them to go to the doctor and be proactive to find a solution.

Oh, if only men did go the GP for a tablet that would provide a solution to male rage then the world would be a far nicer place.

He didnt get a mouthful. I would never ever talk to him like that. It was exaggeration for comedy effect but I guess that passed you by in your desperation to be utterly sanctimonious.

I guess the ‘funny’ part didn’t translate. I’d see the doctor if you’re so angry and irritated, it can’t be nice for either of you

Img mine does that too.. but he also does the “hummmm” noise before he talks, kind of potters around going grumble grumble hummmm.

its sooo annoying.

This is why I run.... cheaper than a divorce and less risky than murder.