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Should boys start School later than girls?

60 replies

senmed · 04/04/2025 14:57

In the aftermath of the whole Adolescence show and the current concern for boys and men I listened to some experts on a podcast talk about how to support young men. One thing that was mentioned was how girls mature faster than boys and that women's brain development is around 18 months ahead of males and as a result boys should be held back a year from starting primary school. So in that case girls would start school at approximately 5 and boys would start at 6 years old, I am assuming in the same cohort.

I'm not sure about this, surely it this would likely cause a massive disadvantage to girls and leave them dealing at a younger age with boys who are older by a year or more than them all though school. There was also the suggestion that school is designed to advantage girls because in school you need to sit quietly, facing the front, put your hand up, be quiet and well behaved and that we need to redesign schools to make them work for boys. This kind of thing always annoys me when I hear it because even back in time when most children were not educated but the sons of the wealthy were educated in classrooms this was the set up which was designed for boys, to sit in a classroom at your desk and work. I also resent the implication that all girls are one way and all boys are another.

I myself was the youngest in my class at 4 when I started School which did cause me some issues. I struggled with having to sit all day, I was always someone who learned by doing and so I excelled more at art, music and ballet until I got to high school where I began to do well academically. There were certainly plenty of boys in my class from primary who had no issue sitting quietly in class and doing their work.

I know there is an issue, part of it is the lack of good opportunities for non academic boys, a lot of that is also down to the fact that wages have not kept up with the cost of living. Modern tech and addictions can be destructive and harmful to both boys and girls but in different ways. I do want boys to be helped but its difficult to listen to this kind of thing and not hear "boys are falling behind and girls are doing better so we need to make things harder for girls so boys can do better again".

Surely their is a better way of doing this?

The expert in the podcast also seemed to suggest that little girls even though they faced more trauma in childhood were less affected by it long term than boys were. That girls were mostly "dandelions" which can thrive anywhere under any conditions but that boys were more likely to be "orchids" who need special care and attention to thrive. Forgive me if I call bullshit on that one.

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 04/04/2025 15:00

I don't agree with different starting ages for schools. I agree with your point about non-academic opportunities being limited.

W0tnow · 04/04/2025 15:00

Do girls mature faster? As in, is there scientific evidence for this? Or are societal expectations the driver of more ‘mature’ behaviours in girls?

As an aside I think 4 is way too young to start school. For either sex.

ScarletWitchM · 04/04/2025 15:00

I don’t think boys should start later than girls as that would just not work. But i do think teenagers should start school day at 11am not before 9am as their circadian rhythms are set to wake later. Unfortunately we have a blanket approach to education which was set in the 1800’s and based on banking hours

Interested in this thread?

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senmed · 04/04/2025 15:02

W0tnow · 04/04/2025 15:00

Do girls mature faster? As in, is there scientific evidence for this? Or are societal expectations the driver of more ‘mature’ behaviours in girls?

As an aside I think 4 is way too young to start school. For either sex.

I don't know either, I think that it is more that each individual child is probably different in how they develop and that it is less to do with sex.

OP posts:
BatchCookBabe · 04/04/2025 15:03

That sounds like a terrible idea. Boys are behind girls as it is by a couple of years all through school. (Well, many of them are.) This would achieve nothing. Only to disadvantage boys.

TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 15:14

I think a better solution would be staggered starting. My DD was 4 in August but started in January. She would have been fine Sept but many of the boys needed the extra term at nursery. Now everyone starts in September and I think a second start point a term later would help some dc. Even a Feb or after Easter start for some.

Starting boys a whole year later is problematic. Do they miss out YR altogether and join the girls in Y1, or go into YR with girls a year younger? Not sure either are fair.

The other way is to really single out the dc who need extra help much earlier. Target the help instead of a scattergun approach. Boys starting later means women don’t get back to work when they may wish to either. Lots of issues to think about but some boys are fine starting school when they do. Delaying a year will make some of them just shy of 6 and they might never have been near a nursery.

ErrolTheDragon · 04/04/2025 15:16

It would disadvantage girls in some ways and boys in another, based afaik largely on sexist ideas rather than reality.

Perhaps early years learning would benefit from being more an extension of preschool type activities and less formal learning? Som kids - of either sex - are ready to start reading and writing at 4-5, others aren’t so they have a year or two of frustration till they’re ready. Afaik the U.K. is out of step with most European countries.

SinkToTheBottomWithYou · 04/04/2025 15:18

Single sex schools?

Bluevelvetsofa · 04/04/2025 15:22

Reception year is fairly play based, but there’s a change in Year 1. If children are used to a system that changes between one year and the next, it’s probably difficult for some to adjust. Maybe it’s boys who are more likely to find the change harder to deal with.

readingmakesmehappy · 04/04/2025 15:24

I have an ASD and probably ADHD boy who finds sitting still extremely hard, doesn’t have the fine motor control to do the cursive writing his first school demanded in Reception and needs plenty of time outside. I wish he’d been able to start school at 6

senmed · 04/04/2025 15:27

@TizerorFizz I think you make some great points, especially in your last paragraph. The help should be targeted at the individual child. As you say not allowing boys to start school until 6 makes life harder mostly likely for women who work and often need to work and it perhaps delays other issues being picked up on earlier if they are out of the system until starting primary. Having said that there is increasingly little to no support even for those who have issues picked up due to budget constraints.

OP posts:
TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 15:30

@ErrolTheDragon I think the YR EY curriculum is the second year of the curriculum. It does continue and build on what nursery offers. Some dc don’t go to nursery though. Some dc aren’t ready for school but parents don’t receive info early enough about what’s required, let alone practice it. We didn’t get any info until DD had to be timed regarding getting changed into pe kit and then back into school clothes in YR. She was more than capable but many DC struggled. I don’t think some parents know what school ready looks like and nurseries really could be a better bridge.

Neither are they expected to sit down facing the front all day. I was a governor of a junior school and that didn’t happen there either. Yes, there’s a lesson but DC soon break into work groups and tables. In YR there’s lots of experiments and play style learning.

happysunr1se · 04/04/2025 15:39

ScarletWitchM · 04/04/2025 15:00

I don’t think boys should start later than girls as that would just not work. But i do think teenagers should start school day at 11am not before 9am as their circadian rhythms are set to wake later. Unfortunately we have a blanket approach to education which was set in the 1800’s and based on banking hours

My Chinese DH said that in Hong Kong they used to have 2 sessions in a school, morning til early afternoon and then afternoon til early evening.

If this was utilized you could even have super schools where the school is a primary in the morning and a secondary in the afternoon, changing staff as necessary.

Starting after lunch and finishing in the evening might suit teenagers.

user2848502016 · 04/04/2025 15:49

I don’t agree- but I do think schools need to recognise that there’s an awful lot of variation in ability and maturity between 4/5 year olds so plan activities accordingly. Good schools already do this to be fair

TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 15:54

@happysunr1seThe EY curriculum might be quite difficult to provide in a secondary school! Size of tables and chairs for starters and what’s actually in the classrooms. I would think most people here don’t want evening school when dc are tired.

MissGeist · 04/04/2025 15:56

No, we'd have an even bigger mess to deal with. A lot of those boys wouldn't be educated in that "missing" year and would come to school unprepared and more likely to mess around.

YourWinter · 04/04/2025 15:59

My September-born DD started school two weeks before her fifth birthday.

My August-born DS started school two weeks after his fourth birthday.

They’re now in their 30s and have great careers, but for a very long time I wished I’d held DS back a year. Perhaps he’d have had an easier ride, though, if he hadn’t been one school year behind the sister who was almost two years older.

TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 16:01

My DD is also an August birthday and the cut off is somewhere! She didn’t need holding back but I think delaying some dc by a term would be a start.

WeaselsRising · 04/04/2025 16:27

I started school in the 60s, when you went as a Rising 5 in the term before your 5th birthday. You could start in January, after Easter or in September.

That was changed because they thought all children should have the same number of terms in Infants.

The current system doesn't take children's individual maturity into account, so I was more a fan of the way it was.

DD1 started at 4.5 and was more than ready, while her brothers were already 5, and one of them would have benefited from another term at home. DD2 was 4.5 and nowhere near ready.

TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 16:29

@WeaselsRising I actually think you should have a choice. Few need to delay a whole year but the prep for YR should be first class and mandatory.

burningmountain · 04/04/2025 16:34

All children should start school later. Formal school should not start till 7 and all children should have high quality early years provision before that.

Schools should encourage more activity (especially active play) in school. Sitting down so much is really bad for, well anyone, and especially young children..

Agree with PP that high school starts too early in the morning as well.

School should offer more for non-academic children.

Basically, we need to seriously rethink of education around the developmnet needs of children and young people and around the diversity of children and diversity of need in the future workforce.

I really liked what Finnish maths teacher said. ' school is about finding out what you love.'

EasternStandard · 04/04/2025 16:38

Dc differ. But I’d say no to this, or starting later.

senmed · 04/04/2025 16:45

TizerorFizz · 04/04/2025 16:29

@WeaselsRising I actually think you should have a choice. Few need to delay a whole year but the prep for YR should be first class and mandatory.

Hasn't it become a thing now that man people seek to delay their child starting primary for a year because it confers an advantage? There was a thread here last year which I can't find now. My niece was held back a year from starting although I'm not quite sure why she was more than ready mentally. She is small for her age but the oldest in her class but is always top of her year. She did go to nursery and could read, write and count well even in her last year at nursery.

OP posts:
senmed · 04/04/2025 16:46

@burningmountain Good post!

OP posts:
TheNightingalesStarling · 04/04/2025 16:49

They stopped the mid year entry as it was causing more disadvantage for sumner borns.

With the government's push to get more school nurseries, it would ve a great time to get Reception properly joined with Preschool year (as its part of Early years) and make school starting age 5. Still do phonics and numeracy if the children are ready.
Make year 1 more play based.