Why are accommodations for autistic people often seen as unfair?

[YourPoisedFinch]

In my last job, I received some accommodations and explained them to colleagues when they asked why I was coming in late. Instead of understanding, they accused me of fraud and faking my condition to get special treatment. This isn’t just my experience—many people with mental health conditions and other invisible disabilities face similar challenges. They’re either not believed and resented for receiving accommodations or believed but then negatively stereotyped.

Unfortunately this is my current experience with someone in my workplace

As a parent of ND children it has really challenged me as I consider myself very anti discrimination and pro reasonable adjustments.

But this person takes the absolute p*ss

Not as much support as you might think. Although everyone with autism on this thread seems to get work coaches and other things through Access to Work, my DP gets turned down for things like taxis from Access to Work who just say the employer should be organising work so travel is not necessary.

Pardon? Where did I mention carers in any of my replies? 😒

This is actually a really good example of why people often see accommodations as unfair (again, I'm not saying I'm one of them!). "I could not be in a taxi for 1.5 hours with someone I do not know" isn't something that people unfamiliar with autism can comprehend. To them, it sounds exaggerated to the point of impossible. They'd be saying "why, what would happen?". If the response is along the lines of severe anxiety, panic attack, meltdown etc, again they would perceive that as exaggerated to the point of impossible and doesn't everyone worry or get anxious about getting in a car with a stranger etc etc.

It's a lack of understanding or education. Tbh, that's at the root of most discrimination (some of it is wanton and deliberate).

well then they need to go and get diagnosed then.

People get jealous and feel put out if they feel they are not getting equal treatment

look at the upset about nhs workers or care workers getting free lunches or coffee during lockdown the endless threads were pathetic and unbelievably petty

ignore them op

What we do every single fucking day trying to justify our support needs...

I think it's also a mindset thing, along the lines of some people's default response to something they haven't personally experienced being disbelief. It comes up very often on here, where people just do not believe something happens because it doesn't happen in their own life. It seems much more reasonable to just believe someone who tells you something about a disorder/disease that they have, but for some reason, lots of people seem to think they have the right to criticise the other person's statement about their own life, and that from a position of ignorance. It's very frustrating.

Truthfully I find people are better at accepting disability adjustments for autism and ADHD as so many people have experience of them, than other disabilities.

@Sunnysideup4eva No one cares about carers. I say this as one. No one gives a shit.

This perspective relies on there being infinite accommodations and adjustments that could potentially be made for all 'unprivileged' groups if only these groups would lobby the government and fight hard enough for additional rights. The reality though is that workplaces are made up of groups of people that all fight their own battles and lack privileges in all kinds of ways. To bestow a privilege on one group can often cause additional hardship to another as they have to facilitate the adjustment or privilege often at their own expense.

Privilege is also completely subjective. Lots of people are suggesting that having children is a choice and doesn't require reasonable adjustments but what about a single parent who can't access wraparound childcare or a parent of a SEN child that can't use breakfast clubs etc? They would need reasonable adjustments to work later in the same way that OP would. Without the adjustments they would be unable to work in that job. How is it different?

just as an example, using myself. I'm disabled.. mobility (use crutches/wheelchair) and i also have AuDHD.

I'm also what's called a 'sandwich carer' meaning i am a carer for both my adult child who has profound disability and also my elderly parent who has mobility problems and can't get anywhere without any help.

No, disabled people aren't the only one who have struggles, but can you imagine having those struggles on TOP of being disabled? and STILL not having any flexibility for those caring requirements for parents/kids we're responsible for?

Having disabilities doesn't make us exempt from the other issues life and family throw at us.. we have to navigate those things WHILE being disabled.

Its fucking hard. its REALLY fucking hard.. (and i'm only swearing for emphasis.

We can acknowledge others struggles, but who is acknowledging ours? We're somehow expected to do all that, while being discriminated against for our disabilities. How about folk cut us some slack?

OP I think that your genuine need for adjustments is also being seen with scepticism because of the common phenomenon of people self diagnosing themselves with conditions like anxiety and ADHD (these are the 2 that I hear most often ) and thinking that they should be treated like people who have been diagnosed by a professional.

The diagnostic criteria for being NT are so broad, almost anyone could get a diagnosis at this point. I think the people who identify as NT falsely assume that life is smooth and easy for those without diagnoses. In reality almost all of us struggle in similar ways.

Being truthful, I see a lot of autistic and ADHD people complaining on social media about their experience with an invisible disability. They seem to have zero understanding this is what being disabled is like. Its not because you have autism or ADHD, every disabled person experiences these issues to varying degrees.

Because people don't understand that you're at a disadvantage from the off. They don't understand equity. Sometimes they're just plain jealous and don't even want to understand.

Yeah Gin and Valium!

I think the explosion in non-physiological diagnoses over the last decade has made the public less tolerant of disability. When I was a young adult disability meant a wheelchair, Down syndrome, severe learning difficult etc

Now it seems to overwhelmingly be ASD, ADHD, anxiety, PTSD or fibromyalgia. It seems rare by comparison to come across a disabled person now who has a diagnosis like multiple sclerosis. I think this has diluted the interpretation of disability somewhat as not only are there far more people identifying as disabled, they ‘appear normal’ (because the disability is invisible). When a small minority of people needed accommodations people were more tolerant as it was rare, but it’s much more common now. And that begs the question as to how many adjustments 1 small office (for example) could reasonably accommodate.

My adjustments don’t affect others, and none of my colleagues adjustments affect me, but I wouldn’t be best pleased if my coworker arrived late every day and I was eg covering the phones in that time or sharing a pool of work so I was doing more. If OP stays later, or her workload is the same as others but doesn’t overlap with them, then that’s different.

I have an invisible disability (a bit like epilepsy in that I look fine but am really very unwell and on a lot of medication). I agree with you.

I think you mean ND.

And of course everyone will struggle with many things ND people do.

It's the severity and combinations which form a diagnosis.

For example with autism, must be present from childhood, must have significantly disabled, and must meet the triad of impairments.

I have NT friends who struggle socially. I have NT friends who struggle with loud noises or busy shopping centres. None of these friends are significantly impacted to the point of disability and none of them have the triad of impairments and therefore do not have autism.

ND behaviours are just human behaviours, we're not some weird little aliens who have strange differences that a carrot and stick method can help us overcome them.

Self diagnosis is really tricky because there are long waiting lists for diagnosis for ADHD and autism currently. The needs don't magically appear once a diagnosis is given - they're there all along. People are having to wait years and years, and those needs are there for all that time. If we make reasonable adjustments dependent on a professional diagnosis, people will have to leave the workforce while they await diagnosis through no fault of their own.

I'm lucky in two senses; I was diagnosed with ADHD before the explosion in diagnoses, and I've never needed adjustments in a job due to ADHD. Those two may be linked, though - we're suddenly seeing more people need adjustments for ADHD because back in 2016, I was referred, assessed, diagnosed and medicated within a month. No adjustments needed because medication changed everything.

That isn't an option nowadays, people are having to try and get through unmedicated, which is why more people need the adjustments.

Thissssss

It’s pretty much just because you’re not in a wheelchair.

Sorry, what does NT stand for? I meant to say ND. I feel like almost everyone meets the standard for ND at this point.

No it is not. People are not understanding if you use a wheelchair.
And the word is use, not in.

Just logged in... and are some people this really petty/ not understanding of people with disabiltiies of all things?