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Original poster

Annoyed at son's school

131 replies

sneezeybreezey · 10/02/2025 20:10

Hi,

My son ( 14) is having some issues at school - school are concerned that he is being disruptive in class etc, and affecting the learning of others kids. I am not making excuses for him, but I think that they are too quick to criticise rather than look at what is making him behave like this.

I have contacted the school and have asked for meeting. My work commitment and younger kids etc mean that I am only available to meet at either 7.30am or 5.30pm. Someone from school has called to say that they can't accommodate this as it's outside of their normal hours, and can I make a meeting between 8 and 4.30pm!!

I am not happy - surely they have a duty to support working parents?

OP posts:
100PercentFaithful · 10/02/2025 20:11

YABVVU

StormingNorman · 10/02/2025 20:13

You need to prioritise your son over your work. Take an half day annual leave or ask for unpaid leave if you have to.

marcopront · 10/02/2025 20:13

So they should adjust their working hours rather than you adjusting yours?

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Redflowertable · 10/02/2025 20:13

rather than look at what is making him behave like this

Could it possibly be learned entitled behaviour from his parent?

Come on you're having a laugh aren't you!?

BlondiePortz · 10/02/2025 20:13

No it is not the schools fault and teachers have set hours same as you. And the reason your child is like that is because they choose too

Cam1981 · 10/02/2025 20:14

If it’s that important to you, you’ll make the time to schedule the meeting. You are being way too inflexible

MumChp · 10/02/2025 20:14

Is your work more important than teachers?

Why should the teachers have to work outside hours to satisfy you?

Sort your work hours and younger children and show up at a meeting between 8 am and 4.30 pm..

Sirzy · 10/02/2025 20:15

Surely you have a duty of care to your child’s education?

PinkyU · 10/02/2025 20:17

If you have predictable break times could you schedule a phone meeting for during your lunch hour to discuss things?

TickingAlongNicely · 10/02/2025 20:17

You realise they probably aren't available then die to them being responsible for their own children at that time?

TheAmusedQuail · 10/02/2025 20:17

You'll have to get used to fitting school things into your working life. Nothing at school will happen at 7.30am or 5.30pm. Even parents evenings are being phased out in favour of parent days (from 8-4ish).

Hercisback1 · 10/02/2025 20:18

YABVU
Put your son first.

LaurieFairyCake · 10/02/2025 20:18

How is this different from any other appointment with a professional which takes place in working hours?

5.30 is outside almost ALL SERVICES working hours

It's your kid, it's either important enough to go or it's not.

CaptainFuture · 10/02/2025 20:20

Redflowertable · 10/02/2025 20:13

rather than look at what is making him behave like this

Could it possibly be learned entitled behaviour from his parent?

Come on you're having a laugh aren't you!?

This! And the expectation teachers will adjust their work and family life to meet ops demands, which are basically 'how can I make other people take responsibility for my child's behaviour?!

user2848502016 · 10/02/2025 20:21

YABU
I work full time too, so does DH but if school wanted us to go in for a meeting to discuss DD being disruptive in class we absolutely would prioritise that and take some time off work

It's probably not that they're not sympathetic either, but they can't just let him continue to be disruptive, it's really unfair on the other pupils

cestlavielife · 10/02/2025 20:22

You need to take time off work for your ds school.meeting.
You get annual leave
Take it

noblegiraffe · 10/02/2025 20:23

You asked for the meeting, you make time for it.

DorothyStorm · 10/02/2025 20:24

I am not making excuses for him, but I think that they are too quick to criticise rather than look at what is making him behave like this.
They are telling you his behaviour isnt meeting expectations. It doesn't matter what he is feeling when he is disrupting everyone else, the outcome is the same.

I am irritated my bank isnt open on a Saturday afternoon. Im still waiting to hear back from them asking why they refuse to accommodate my days…

frozendaisy · 10/02/2025 20:24

Perhaps you (and his dad?) could try and work out what is making him behave like this? Isn’t that part of parenting? Or have I missed something.

Greenfencebrowntree · 10/02/2025 20:25

Why on earth do you think they have a duty to support working parents?

They have a duty to educate children. Regardless of their parents' schedules.

Tiswa · 10/02/2025 20:25

The number of staff required to keep the building open at those times is high and including support staff who aren’t paid very much.
Go in the hours the school is open

Whoarethoseguys · 10/02/2025 20:26

sneezeybreezey · 10/02/2025 20:10

Hi,

My son ( 14) is having some issues at school - school are concerned that he is being disruptive in class etc, and affecting the learning of others kids. I am not making excuses for him, but I think that they are too quick to criticise rather than look at what is making him behave like this.

I have contacted the school and have asked for meeting. My work commitment and younger kids etc mean that I am only available to meet at either 7.30am or 5.30pm. Someone from school has called to say that they can't accommodate this as it's outside of their normal hours, and can I make a meeting between 8 and 4.30pm!!

I am not happy - surely they have a duty to support working parents?

Do you prioritise clients/customers outside your normal working hours? .
I'm sorry but you are being unreasonable. You can't expect staff to arrange a meeting around you. A teacher in a secondary school could teach a 100 students it's impossible for them to arrange a time to suit all their working hours .

Lumpysparrow · 10/02/2025 20:26

This entitled attitude from parents is why I need to get out of teaching.

WhatWasPromised · 10/02/2025 20:26

Just another voice saying you’re the problem here. Make yourself available for this. You owe it to your son to put his point across if you feel he’s being treated unfairly

OneHangryDuck · 10/02/2025 20:28

Tiswa · 10/02/2025 20:25

The number of staff required to keep the building open at those times is high and including support staff who aren’t paid very much.
Go in the hours the school is open

This too.
If you and DP both attend, they will need to have at least four members of staff working at least one extra hour, unpaid I'm sure, to safeguard the one teacher you're already certain is neglecting DS, just in case you refuse to take any responsibility for parenting and instead decide to get physical.

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