What would you have done? (Inheritance)

[TheAmusedQuail]

My grandparents had always been quite clear what they wanted done with their estate. Contents of bank accounts shared between their children (2 brothers). Value of their house shared between their grandchildren (4 of us).

Granny died and Grandad remarried (this isn't going where you think). Step-granny had nothing. My dad and my grandfather and my uncle were estranged.

My grandad became frail and my step-granny had always been a bit pathetic. So my uncle convinced my grandad to sell the house and buy a big house together that they all (uncle & aunt, grandad and step granny) would live in.

Grandad died. Step granny's daughter arranged for her to go into a Salvation Army care home (in an attempt to get her hands on grandad's money - she failed).

Uncle and aunt, and by default, my cousins got all of the inheritance. I know this was deliberate, because the one time I saw my aunt with my mum after Grandad's death, my aunt discussed 'Our children's inheritance' (meaning myself and my brother and my cousins). My divorced parents did nothing about it and so my brother and I lost all of our inheritance.

What would you OR your parents have done? Was doing nothing the right thing, because it was too complex to disentangle? Or should they have fought it?

I was a very young adult at the time and it didn't occur to me we should have done anything. Incidentally, my uncle is still alive and has remarried a woman with nothing after my aunt's death. My cousins definitely benefitted (house deposits, cars etc).

What was the will at your grandmother and then your grandfathers time of death?

Clear intentions, without a will, mean very little.

I am assuming that your grandad didn't stipulate his wishes in a will, in which case there isn't much that could have been done.

No will is the issue plus your Dad became estranged.

Contesting a will is very expensive, there was an issue with inheritance a number of years ago in my family where a will was updated without telling the executors, it was a new one legally drawn up by a solicitor, all witnessed etc. My siblings wanted to contest it. I consulted 2 solicitors, for the 250k that would have been the value between 6 of us it just wasn’t worth the risk. The only person I know that has contested a will had to find 30k as did his other relative for fees. They did win but 3 million was at stake.

People need to make and update their wills if they want wishes followed. Chat means nothing.

The only thing relevant is what was in the will. I didn't really follow a lot of the twists and turns in your post - I'm not clear what you are suggesting. Are you suggesting that someone's will was surprising, or are you suggesting that the executors of a will acted illegally by not making sure that the beneficiaries named in the will got what had been left to them?

I think a lot of especially men will encourage their parent to move in to get the parents money from the house then into their property so not passed down to siblings.
It happened in my nans case too. My uncle got house with granny annexe, for various reasons the house was meant to go to my mum. So what would have been 300k 10yrs ago. So uncle got that all included in his house. Any other money was shared, though he also went through all her belongings so likely took jewllry etc.

I don't really understand what has gone on here but if your grandparents didn't make proper wills it doesn't really matter what their intentions were.

What was in the Will? If he hadn't made a Will most if his assets would have passed to his wife as his next of kin so I assume he had a Will leaving everything to your cousins. If so I don't think you could have done anything. If his Will left everything as you set out , and your Aunt and Uncle ignored the Will then your parents could have taken them to court.

...my brother and I lost all of our inheritance.

No you didn't lose your inheritance. It wasn't "yours". If they wanted you to have it there would/should have been a will stating that. But it does get quite wearing on here the number of people who think an inheritance is a right. Until it is actually in your bank account, it isn't yours.

So your grandfather had one son with whom he lived , shared lots of time etc with, and I would imagine at he got older he was being looked after by to some extent, and another son from whom he was estranged?
If so I'm not sure why it's surprising that his assets were left to the son (and his descendents) he had a relationship with.

So your grandad provided the money for a house which was put into your uncle’s name? If so, then at the point the did this, he chose to gift one of his sons that money, and it was his prerogative to do so.

If he died without making a will, then his spouse would usually inherit contents of the bank account etc, unless he had previously gifted this money also.

Did he ever make a will?

It’s also a bit much to call your step granny pathetic for agreeing to move into a large house with her husband’s family so that they could help with him when he was frail and she herself was ageing.

If your grandparents left their money (understandably) to the one person in the family who had a relationship with them, was housing them and providing care, then that was their choice.

It doesn't seem that you were ever entitled to anything, since there doesn't appear to have been a will written in your favour in force at the time of death.

The only challenge there could have been is if your DGF died intestate, in which case his money should have gone partially to his wife with the remainder split between his two children. However, I suspect he may have made arrangements when buying the house that it was in your DUs name so it passed directly to DU. Otherwise surely it would have passed to his wife instead of his son?

The only thing that counts here is the law. So we woudl need details of all relevant wills, if any and in addition to that if anyone at date of death even if adult was being supported by the deceased person which might mean the 1973 Act could be invoked.

"being quite clear" is legally completely irrelevant. the only thing that matters is the law and the wills if any of everyone who died and what is in joint names so may fall outside the estate.

If he died intestate, why would it not all have gone to his spouse?

So basically your parents house was sold and used to finance a new house for uncle?

so when uncle died there was no house to leave to you?

yep it’s shit but if there’s no house it doesn’t matter what the will says. You could try the land registry to see if grandparents were legal owners when it was bought, and if the will said anything about where their share went.

bil did the same to dh. Was all oh my dad is moving in with me, sold the house (700k). He died about a month after moving in, the money had been transferred into bil’s name so none of it came under the estate.

dh got nothing, despite the will stating 50:50 to each child.

The original intentions just didn’t apply at time of death.
Remarriage and estrangement.

So in this case nothing.

This doesn’t make sense; either your grandad just paid towards the house but wasn’t named on it or he left his part of it to your uncle in the will. Either way he knew what he was doing and it’s a shame for you but I can’t see that much could have been done. If he’d left his share if the house to his grandchildren then you’d have got something but he didn’t

If what happened wasn’t in keeping with the will or the amount under the law that he “lost” was over, say 50k, my father would have got lawyers involved and challenged the executives. If my mum had been the grandparent’s child, she probably wouldn’t.

What did your grandads will say?

Did he leave the house and money to your uncle? Or his wife?

If he left no valid will (I.e a will made after he remarried) and you are in England, his estate would have gone mostly to the wife, and some to your uncle and Dad, if over a certain amount.

It’s all down to the will.

And men ALWAYS remarry, and fail to make sure their first wife’s wishes are respected or their children left any money.

OK, probably not all, but all the Dad’s of my friends who have lost their Mums.

Rules of intestacy

Married partners and civil partners
People who were married or in a civil partnership with the person when they died can inherit under the rules of intestacy. This includes if they were separated but still married.
Without a valid will, a person can’t inherit if:

• they were divorced from the person who died
• their civil partnership had legally ended when the person died

If there are children If the estate is valued at more than £322,000 , the inheritance is divided between the partner and the children. If the estate is £322,000 or less then the children don’t inherit. The partner inherits:

• all the personal property and belongings of the person who has died
• the first £322,000 of the estate
• half of the remaining estate

The children will inherit the other half of the remaining estate. If the person who died had more than 1 child, this amount will be divided equally between them. This includes any child adopted by the person who died. It also includes any biological or adopted child the person had from other relationships.

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/death-and-wills/who-can-inherit-if-there-is-no-will-the-rules-of-intestacy/

Sorry @mrsm43s , I could have googled that

Agree with others, this is meaningless without knowing if there was a will and what was in it. Because if there was, and it didn't favour your dad, what would there be to fight for? People can leave their estates to who they want. Hurt feelings doesn't make a legal case.

Expressing wishes, however clear and however often, is completely useless unless you make a will that legally sets out your wishes.
It sounds like your grandparents didn't do this? In which case, however sad and frustrating, there is nothing at all that could have been done.

You couldn’t have done anything but maybe your father could have tried to mend the relationship. What does he say about all this?

The ship has long since sailed. And this isn't a post saying 'I was entitled' or 'We should have contested the will.' It was never considered to contest anything. I don't think there even was a will. Plus, by the point the joint house was bought (Grandad paid the vast majority) he was in a bad way and probably not up to making those decisions. Making my Uncle's attitude towards rinsing his own father even more suspect.

It's more about the general attitude of 'Oh well. That's over.' I think I'm interested in the general acceptance of Uncle/Aunt/Cousins greed. We were a relatively close family (not my dad, he was absent) and this greed destroyed the relationship between that side of the family and ours. Odd that no one ever stood up and said 'How could you?' Because otherwise, my Uncle was a very good man. Kind. Caring. Good husband, father, uncle, son.