Born in 80s. Anyone else's parents never take them to the GP?

[lumpybumper]

So this dawned on me when I was trying to sleep last night. I was born in the 80s and I remember the first time I ever got taken to the GP I was 12 with an ear infection. I must have been poorly at some point before then, but I was never taken.
I wasn't neglected in any way. Nice upbringing, holidays, hobbies.
I remember a period of when I was 7 where I would throw up every single day for pretty much a year when I woke up in the morning. My mum used to tell me it was because I "had worked myself up" and used to watch me throw up every morning and then take me to school as normal. Looking back it was probably anxiety, but I never got taken to the GP. She used to tell my teacher I had thrown up every morning and no-one batted an eye lid. If my child threw up every day for a year I would 100% be at the doctors!
Also I developed a severe mental health issue aged 10 which still affects me now. Again, never got any help or taken to the GP. If anything my parents ripped the piss out of the strange things I did and behaviours I showed for years and years.
Did parents in the 80s just not bother with GPs? It blows my mind. My kids get taken at least once a year for one issue or another, infections, rashes, etc etc.

I was born in 84 and my parents definitely took me to the gp when needed

How awful

what are your parents like now? Close to them?

You’re focussing on fact they never took you to a GP

but clearly it’s the tip of the iceberg of a thoroughly shit and neglectful childhood

Agreed surely it's more the neglectful attitude of your parents that is concerning than not being taken to a gp?

Yeah really close to my parents now. I don't know if they just didn't want to make a fuss. They encourage me to book doctors appointments for my kids when they are poorly! It's so strange.
I also remember at 15 crying for days in pain and them getting really annoyed when I asked to be taken to the hospital in the night. Turns out I had a cyst on my ovary. For days they had been making me hot water bottles and giving me laxatives thinking I was constipated!
Maybe I was just a very dramatic child and they thought I was making a fuss?

Are you sure it's not just that you can't remember going?

One of our children has barely been to the GP just because the lucky soul never seems to get ill. The couple of times he did need to go through we were there in a shot

The other two children both have asthma and are in and out of the GP

Sorry cross post with your latest message! Yes that must have been horrible and I can't understand why they didn't take you

It's like they cared, but didn't want to inconvenience anyone. They both grew up in really big families, think 6-8 siblings and I know they never got taken to the gp. Their parents just dealt with illness at home. I got given pain relief and rehydration sachets and hot water bottles etc. And big bottles of lucozade when I was poorly.
Also daily vitamins. Just never taken to the GP!

If they genuinely didn't take you, despite you being in pain, having mental health disorders etc then that IS neglect OP! Whether you can see it or not.

I'm slightly older, but yes, I recall going to the GP many times as a child! Ear infections, D&V, chest infection etc.

My ex H mum was like that.
Her dad (in his 90s) had a fall onto ice and I was dealing with my toddlers so just assumed an ambulance had been called. Sorted toddlers and went out to check on her dad and they were just making him a cup of tea! He was completely grey in colour. I told her pretty sternly that he needed an ambulance and she eventually gave in and rang 111 and was very apologetic for troubling them. Of course they called an ambulance - and he had broken both hips and needed surgery!

OP, my single parent was similar, unfortunately. Rarely took us to the doc. It’s not just a sign of growing up in 80s - when people did engage with healthcare less. I remember a doc being called out when I had glandular fever, but that was only because my aunt visited and when she saw me said to call the doc.

Never took us to the dentist for check ups. In fact, if it was something serious, I remember on many occasions going alone to the dentist.
Injured my knee badly ice-skating, and my friends mum took me to the hospital.

It’s was deeply neglectful. It took me a while to recognise that it was.

Yeah looking back I can see it was neglectful and I would never ever do the same for my kids.
I just find it really bizarre their reasons behind it.
When I was throwing up for a year I remember having tums, rennies, milk of magnesium every morning. I also had some rescue remedy type drops to try as well. So it's as though they did try to help me, but never bothered with a professional opinion.

Born '83
I went to the docs when needed but not for every cough and sniffle.
When I was in crippling pain in the middle of the night, mother took me to A&E only to be sent home. It continued and she got a doctor out to the house - I had appendicitis.

I barely take/took my own kids. They are teens now and rarely get ill. They seem to have decent immune systems.
I took DD for the first time last year as she had a wee infection. The doctor remarked she had not been to the surgery since her 6 week check and I said no, I've never needed to bring her before. She has obviously been ill when she was little like sickness bugs at playgroup, the odd cold, chicken pox, but nothing I wasn't confident I could manage.
I don't hesitate if I feel they need a doctor.

What relationship do you have with your parents now?

You are really close to your parents?
have you even spoken to them about this?

you continue to endure the mental health difficulties that you developed as a young child that received no treatment?

do your parents ever care for your children? I wouldn’t allow them ever alone with them

Maybe because your parents knew, OP, that most minor illnesses don't require a visit to the GP? Typical ailments usually get better with time, and symptoms can be managed with over the counter medications.
But the culture now is to go to the GP for every little thing (eg tummy bugs, coughs and colds) and it's totally ridiculous.

Born in 1972. I had 100% attendance from the age of 11. Remember passing out a few times in a morning. Throwing up and numerous high temps due to tonsillitis.

My mum was worried about letting people down and not making a fuss.

Yep, same with my mum. I broke my wrist when I was 9 and she didn't believe me, my friends Nan had to bandage it up for me for about 12 weeks. I also had ingrown toenails from age 6 to late teens and she wouldn't take me to the gp, she told me she'd scald my feet with hot water if I didn't stop "causing" them though.

I’m that much older, and you had to be really ill before bothering the GP.

I was once off school for a whole week with tonsillitis, but since it was ‘just a ‘
sore throat’ there was no GP involvement. As a result, I evidently carried that bug for years, since it recurred on and off until a seriously bad dose of it when I was in my 30s, when a GP eventually gave me enough of the right ABs to see it off for good. And I’ve never had it since.

90s baby but raised by grandparent.
As a kid I suddenly developed stretch marks EVERYWHERE, not just areas you'd expect. I also would fall over randomly, my ankles would give way just crossing the road. I would wake up crying in pain from my bones. On school trips I remember fainting.
Not once was I taken to the GP. I was instead told to toughen up and made fun of for being weak.
In my mid-30s I found out I have EDS, POTS and I just get angry.
It was neglect.

I remember my mum being very proud we hadn't been to the doctors in years! She was very much of the mind set that the doctors are busy and don't need us taking up their time! But we obviously went for ear infections ect I suppose we were just lucky that we didn't get poorly that often!!

It's hard something to shake this off with my own kids and have to remember I have every right to see the doctor the same as everyone else does!!

See this is what I wondered. Did people just go to the doctors less back then as they were confident they could treat things at home. Although I threw up daily for a year it wasn't life threatening and as soon I got into school each day I was right as rain!
Or maybe I was just unlucky with my mental health and these conditions were swept under the carpet more back then?

I was born in '81, and I don't remember going to the GP as a child, but the doctor back then did make house calls. There was one Christmas holidays when my sister and I were very sick and the doc came out, possibly there were one or two other visits, can't remember. Not sure we ever had anything that would warrant going to the GP. Chicken Pox etc you just ride it out at home.

Edited to add: ear infections of course. The horrible banana-flavoured liquid antibiotic. Must have been prescribed, but maybe the doc came out. I don't remember going. I think my sister went to the cottage hospital once, but she was more accident-prone than me.

I rarely went to the doctor, but I was born in the 60s an was healthy. My kids were born late 80s and early 90s. I took them to the doctor when needed, my youngest child has dodgy ears and I was back and forwards to the doctor. I learnt to tell whether it would clear up by itself or if she'd need antibiotics.

I'm sure if I was a modern mum I would be taking them to the doctors far more often

My children were born in the very late 90s and early 2000s but very rarely needed to go to the doctor beyond vaccinations and health checks.

My son went for what was eventually diagnosed as ASD and hypermobility and my daughter needed a few checks in her early weeks as she was born with a heart arrythmia and gastric reflux but both resolved within a few months. My daughter once had a whole body skin allergic reaction to leylandii trees (we didn't know she was allergic and went to a maze of them) and twice fell and needed stitches on her chin, those were A&E jobs, rather than the GP.

Neither of them needed antibiotics until they were adults and other than minor self-limiting sickness and respiratory bugs that we could treat at home the only bug that kept them off school for more than 48 hours was chicken pox and even that was not bad enough to need a doctor.

It could be that your parents should have taken you to the doctor more often but that may not have been a generational thing.