Born in 80s. Anyone else's parents never take them to the GP?

[lumpybumper]

So this dawned on me when I was trying to sleep last night. I was born in the 80s and I remember the first time I ever got taken to the GP I was 12 with an ear infection. I must have been poorly at some point before then, but I was never taken.
I wasn't neglected in any way. Nice upbringing, holidays, hobbies.
I remember a period of when I was 7 where I would throw up every single day for pretty much a year when I woke up in the morning. My mum used to tell me it was because I "had worked myself up" and used to watch me throw up every morning and then take me to school as normal. Looking back it was probably anxiety, but I never got taken to the GP. She used to tell my teacher I had thrown up every morning and no-one batted an eye lid. If my child threw up every day for a year I would 100% be at the doctors!
Also I developed a severe mental health issue aged 10 which still affects me now. Again, never got any help or taken to the GP. If anything my parents ripped the piss out of the strange things I did and behaviours I showed for years and years.
Did parents in the 80s just not bother with GPs? It blows my mind. My kids get taken at least once a year for one issue or another, infections, rashes, etc etc.

First time I booked an appointment with the doctors as an adult I remember that he looked at my records and remarked 'looks like the last time we saw you was for a throat infection when you were two'. My mother believed in what I can only assume was a pre-NHS approach of relying on home remedies.

I felt my mum took me to gp too often, thinking back, it wasn't necessary for every ear ache/cold, sickness bug etc, antibiotics were more easily given out, so I guess she felt she should rely on that.

I don't remember going as a kid but I do remember banana flavoured antibiotics on multiple occasions so I guess we went and I have forgotten it

I grew up rather earlier and went through a phase when I had what I suppose was something like migraines: I would just wake up feeling awful and nauseous. Invariably I would be sent to school, and I think my teacher got into the habit of checking up on me and, if I looked green, sending me off to lie down. I'd tell my mum what had happened when I got back but it didn't seem to change anything.

Eventually I suspect the school must have said something because I did get taken to the doctor's, but it took a long time. With hindsight, I suspect they were pretty pissed off that they were being used to babysit a sick child.

Totally not normal op. I was born in the seventies and when we were little you didn’t make a gp appointment, just turned up at the surgery and waited. I remember spending many long sessions in that waiting room!
Try not to hold it against your parents op. Don’t let it spoil the relationship you have with them now. Who knows what their reasons were?

Yep, I suffered excruciating tummy aches from the age of 8 and often begged my Mum to take me to the hospital. She never even took me to the GP and said “there’s nothing anybody can do for a tummy ache.” I believed this and 20 years later I was diagnosed with gastroparesis and by that point my stomach had lost all its function and I had a feeding tube placed.

She took earache seriously but nothing else and I still don’t know why. Oddly with my children, she’s always telling me to take them to the GP for really minor things…

FWIW I have a friend who had to lie down every morning after her glass of milk as she reacted badly to it. Didn’t occur to her parents not to give her the milk!
it sounds like coming from large families it just didn’t occur to yours to use the GP. My mother didn’t trust GPs at all and we didn’t really go. Went to A&E a couple of times though

My children were born in the 80s I definitely took them to the doctor's! I was there much more often for them than for myself.
I also come from a big family and my mother would also phone the doctor if any of is were ill. The doctor would come to the house.

They definitely took me. But I needed a lot of operations before I was 5 so maybe not comparable.

But they took me for basic stuff like tonsillitis too.

No wonder you suffered with your mental health. Your parents didn't have your back and you knew it.
I definitely think you should look at therapy and I really hope you've managed to build a beautiful family or group of friends to support you as an adult

Similar here OP. Had regular headaches and vomiting, severe period pain. Loads of other symptoms that I never communicated as thought normal to manage everything myself eg palpitations and faintness, sore throat. Also concussion once and no doctor was seen. eventually diagnosed lots of chronic conditions.
imo emotional neglect also featured in this situation

In terms of my childhood in the 80s/90s we definitely went when needed. I had ear infections regularly so can remember going to the GP quite a few times

What also happened was that if we were particularly ill /if it suited the GP they would also come to the house. So I think I have as many memories of the GP coming to the house as I do of going to the surgery.

When my brother had croup my mum just called the GP in the middle of the night and he came to the house within minutes. Admittedly he lived down the road and we lived in a small village but it didn't seem to be an unusual thing for him.

No I didn't go to the gp, but I don't remember being ill. My dc were born 2000 and I can count how many times dd2 went to the gp on one hand, mostly for routine appointments eg jabs, dd1 older has sn so went far more.

It's not a fun day out, you only go if you need treatment, I'm guessing you didn't op!

I was born in 84 and was at the GP all the time because I had asthma and was constantly sick.

My DC are 6 and 4 and I doubt they've had five GP appointments between them (outside of vaccinations) because they're never sick enough to need anything other than a day or two at home with Calpol and cuddles (thanks to DH's genes not mine clearly!).

I wouldn't judge your parents OP, I don't think parents were bringing young DC to the GP for anxiety in those days. The conversation around mental health was completely different and you have to judge them by the norms of the time. They were clearly loving parents doing their best.

I was born in the 70s and I remember going to the dr or having home visits for lots of things like sick bugs, colds etc in the early 80s. Things I wouldn't take my kids for. You only had to sneeze and you were there. And antibiotics for everything too. I'm pretty sure I had several courses a year.

I was born in 1982 , we did go to the doctors but very rarely, my mum is still very averse to the doctors now. She did take us, we just needed to be quite ill before we went. I do think it's a generational thing.... I take my children to the doctors pretty regularly and I think she thinks I'm overly anxious with them (I'm not , I just like to get things checked out)

I was born in the 60's and had 2 older siblings and we definitely went to the GP and had home visits too - but you would have to either be in a significant amount of pain or covered in a rash. We certainly didn't visit the GP for every little rise in temperature, sore throat or stubbed toe as some people seem to do with their kids these days.

77 kid here and my parents took me to the doctor when needed, it wasn’t often but they still took me.

my youngest dd is 14 and only been to the doctors about 5 times in her life including one overnight stay in hospital when she was 5 months which involved an ambulance. She’s just never that ill.

Mental health issues were not as clearly understood then.
Now-a-days they are to the fore.
My parents waited until I was suffering pain for a while or had clearly broken my arm etc. I think they trusted that many ailments get better on their own; which they did.

I can never remember asking to see a doctor. I saw one for vaccinations at school and possibly four other times as a kid.
I trusted the hot water bottle (it worked for me) the leg rubs on my growing pains, and flat lemonade when I was sick.

However, I was taken to the dentist every six months.

Do you think your life was ever in danger, Op?

We were never took to the dentist, seriously. The first time I went was when I had my ds and used the maternity free dentistry. I asked my mum why and she said oh well you saw the school dentist, what fucking school dentist?!
I was born end of '89.

My parents generally took me to the dr if needed but I do remember a time when I was 14 and I tipped a whole saucepan of boiling water over my left foot causing a huge blister and subsequent infection. It covered the whole of my foot pretty much. I was in the st John ambulance cadets and so knew to put my foot under cool water straight away. The odd thing was that despite the severity of the injury they didn't take me to a dr or A& E. About a week after, they did speak to a neighbour across the road who was a GP but he said too late to go to A& E at that point ( again odd??). I remember going to school and showing this gammy green wound to my friends who recoiled in horror. I bandaged it myself etc. I look back and wonder wtf my parents were thinking of, maybe I just sort of kept it from them and they didn't realize how bad it was? They weren't generally neglectful by my mum did have quite severe MH issues. If this had been one of my kids they would have been rushed to A & E, I'd have been checking the injury as needed, re-dressing it etc. I look back now and find their lack of attention just bizarre.

I have no recollection of going to a GP as a child but did have my tonsils out so must have at some point.
I feel we have went the complete opposite, as so many people saturate the NHS unnecessarily, even here on MN it's go to A&E, call the police.

My mum was extreme in the other direction. I was never out of the doctor's. I think she liked the attention she got from having a "sick" child.

I have more of a watch-and-wait approach with my own children. I wouldn't take them immediately for a suspected infection or a rash, only if they get worse or don't get better which is rare. Mental health issues or ND in youngsters (especially in girls) weren't really recognised when I was a child in the 80s and 90s though. Thankfully things have changed since then. It's hard to say if your experience was neglect or just a sign of the times.

My mum rarely took us to the doctors, but she was a nurse so you had to be close to death to warrant medical attention. When I was 7 I remember being sent to school with a really sore throat, feeling like absolute shit for days. I ended up so poorly that the doctor was eventually summoned to the house (remember that!) It turned out that I had glandular fever.

We would never have been taken with D&V or rashes, or a virus that hadn’t been ongoing for a very lengthy period.

I was born in the 1980s...I was definitely taken to the GP...for physical health problems. I think taking a child to the GP for mental health problems was pretty rare in the 80s though. In fact any kind of mental health support for children was unheard of I think