Am I fooling myself? (School run & distance)

[december2020]

I wasn't sure what topic to put this under, so opted for Chat.

The first choice school I'd pick for DS is about 2.2 miles away.

Maps says it is about a 50 minute walk, 14 min bike ride and 10 minute drive.
DS will be starting reception, so 4 years old turning 5, so he has little legs and walking is boring.

We've got one car at the moment and due to work patterns between DH and I, there won't always be a car available for school pick ups and drop offs

On car days, parking will be very limited. DH can carry on to work when he's doing the school run, for me, I'd need to drive back home to then walk to the train station.

On non-car days, I need to get to the school, then carry on to the train station to get to the office. DH takes the car due to his work and hours.

We are looking to get another car, but need to have a back-up plan till then. Even so, car days for me aren't ideal with the back and forth and then walk to the station. It may even be faster for me to go to the station straight from the school.

Am I fooling myself that we can make this work? What would even be the best commute pattern? DH and I both work full time and have no family nearby to help, so it is solely on us.

I think this would be the hands down absolute best school and choice for DS, hence why I am seriously considering it.

It takes a week to buy a car. You have until September. Make it a priority.

I don't think you can make him walk. It sounds like cycling is the best option. Are you confident to cycle with him on the back? Drop him to school and cycle onto the station.

Or get DH to drop you both off at school on his way to work and kill some time in a cafe before you need to take him in if DH is leaving for work early.

Or just get the second car before September. You've got ages to sort it out.

DS is currently in reception and honestly there's no way he would do that walk daily. I would caution you to not underestimate just how much school takes out of them and how much of a pain in the arse the walk will become especially in the winter months.

Just cycle? Seems like a simple solution. Either with a bike seat or a bike trailer or tag along bike.

Electric bike and kid carrier.

Much cheaper than a car, still a pita when it rains but if you have one of those kid trailers at least the child stays dry.

I chose a better school with an awful commute, I don't regret it at all (and have been doing it for 15 years now!)

Definitely bike it.

Bike! With a child seat on the rear or a tandem attachment.

As previous posters have said, it’s not just about doing it with a tired 4 year old - it’s your 11 year old walking home on their own. It’s about having time to go to the park with friends after school, and having school friends close by.

I get that if you live rurally then 2 miles is nothing, but if you’ve got the opportunity to go to a school on your doorstep, then I really really would. Don’t tie yourself into a car commute.

Both schools will change over the course of your child’s time there, so don’t assume great facilities when they are in Reception is the end of it.

It sounds a bit horrendous. It isn’t just the drop offs and pick ups, but you’ll also have to get there for open book days and assemblies and things, often in the middle of the day. I’d say either go for the 2nd car or go for the nearer one.

Our old walk back from nursery was 0.9 miles. DD is old for her year so did that until nearly 5 and it was AWFUL. So tired and whingy! Poor kid...

She's now in R, and school really does get knackered after school, much more so than nursery. Doing any kind of decent walk would be awful.

But we have an electric cargo bike now as PP mentioned, and it's great! Totally makes a long-ish school run + commute possible.

If you're on Facebook there's a great group called Family Cycling UK that will give you a good insight to the many options for cycling with a child on board. I do what sounds like a similar distance with my nearly 4yr old on the back of my electric bike - no way would I attempt to walk it!

My reception aged child walks fine to school 1.8 miles away (he bitches and moans obviously but he walks it fine, and further if we then walk through the woods on the nice days) and he's a young one in his year, if your child is used to walking, that bit is fine. However with your getting to work on top surely that makes the stress? Is there no option to get another car quicker? A bike with a trailer? It seems like a lot of work for you that you don't need.

We made the same choice BTW - we picked the closer school originally. But then decided to move as it wasn't great past year 3 and the other school is as fantastic as it seemed when we first wanted to choose it so I do understand (luckily Im at home so we can do the walk as I have no where else I need to be).

Oh and 1.8 miles is about a 25 minute walk at a fair pace for us so I'd be surprised if 2.2 was 50 minutes? It does take us longer if we see deer or the kingfisher along the route as dc need dragging away from that kind of thing! Maybe we walk quickly 🤔

Thank you everyone!
I think walking is definitely out of the question.

And the best solution would be a second car of course.

I'm just wondering if I'm asking for a world of pain even with a car and train commute.

But st the same time it feels like the school further away would be so much more beneficial for DS.

Unless you can get a second car or a cargo bike and it’s a safe biking route, I’d say it’s a no go.

sounds like you’d also be using wrap around care - a 50 minute walk before breakfast club or after after school club for a tired reception age child is going to be a bit of a disaster

Your child can walk almost two miles at 4 in 20 minutes? That's very unusual.

Another option is reception at the closer school, then the better school when it's easier

Why cant dh just do the school run?

Can you move?

you could with an electric bike with a proper seat for him.

like this https://ebikepedia.com/lectric-xpedition-electric-bike-review-the-best-and-most-affordable-cargo-ebike-out/

everyone has them round me.

Why is everyone suggesting an electric bike rather than just a conventional bike? It is only 2 miles, unless there is an unbearably steep hill?

My commute to work is about the same distance. I can walk it in 40 minutes but i’m a fit adult who runs a lot, not a small child! I also have showers, a locker, and a drying room at the office which often makes the walk
more bearable.
i rarely walk both ways as doing it with any amount of baggage isn’t pleasant.
i work flexi time so it doesn’t matter what time i arrive and leave.
the bus takes about the same time door to door.
driving at rush hour / school run time is much more than 10minutes but will depend on your local roads.

I think it's worth being mindful of your language you said 'when DH does the school run, for me'. He's not doing you a favour by doing the school run, he's equally responsible for doing it.

I'm with the cycle vote.

Think how fit and healthy you will be ( and your child once he can ride too) and just as part of everyday life rather than an extra gym membership!

Are you in England? Primary school applications for 2025 closed on January 15th?