When your own DH finds you disgusting

[Flipnflop09]

There's no coming back
This is how I real right now
Currently in tears while he sleeps

OP has cancer and is at a low ebb. Is it really appropriate to make her feel worse by lecturing her about porn as some pp are doing? It's part of some people's sex lives, regardless of what people might consider the rights and wrongs to be. OK, OP's DH isn't up for it, but OP hasn't done something outrageous by suggesting it.

Hope your treatment goes well, OP. Your DH should not be treating you like this and you are not repulsive. 💐