What is the most miserable biscuit in existence?

[noblegiraffe]

DH and I are not eating sweet stuff for January and today he commented that he was so fed up with it he would even want to eat a really crap biscuit, so we were debating what that would be.

He reckoned the worst biscuit would be a Nice biscuit, but I think I would much rather eat one of those than a Garibaldi.

Is there a biscuit even more disappointing, that you would be less likely to accept an offer of than a Garibaldi biscuit?

Supermarket own brand digestives are the most disappointing biscuits ever.

The only wafers worth eating are the crisp fan shaped ones with ice-cream.

Bath Oliver/Oatcake/Cornish Wafer are for cheese though aren't they?

Not a biscuit that you would just have with a cuppa?

Gluten free chocolate digestives. It's like eating chocolate covered sawdust

Agree about Tim Tams. I've worked with several Australian locums who go on about them and bring them back from trips home. Couldn't believe how disappointing they were when I tried one. Like a diet version of a Penguin.

Yes, of course.
Though when I was a child I used to very much enjoy nibbling the rows off Cornish Wafers.

Homemade oatcakes are easy and can be very nice, especially if made with some Parmesan.

Rich Tea. There is a lower age limit on those allowed to eat them though.

Custard creams

Twiglets have changed recently, like so many other things. They used to be deliciously marmitey but these days they seem to taste burnt and bitter.

Have you ever given them a Penguin to show them how it should be done?

I'm trying to imagine going to another country and bringing packets of Penguins to distribute and expecting people to be impressed.

Fig roll. Actually I hate Oreos more. There so sweet they make me feel sick. Rich tea are very boring.

No - I was very British about it and said 'Mm, lovely, thanks very much' and left the packet well alone from then on...!

They are really dry and travel really well 😂 it's probably the only item that could come back home in your child's packed lunch, in the same state it went.

They aren't really sweet, like biscuit sweet, although some versions are sweeter than others.

I go through phases of enjoying them. But if we are away for the weekend maybe camping, going into the bush, sports trips etc then a box of Ouma rusks are coming along with you. No discussion needed.

If you ever see any on the imported food shelf in your supermarket, get a box to try. They have also brought out a range of normal biscuits now in a rusk version. So ginger biscuits rusks, shortbread etc. They aren't the original Ouma brand though.

I'm trying to think of a description for a biscuit that sounds less appetising than 'condensed milk flavoured rusk'. None of that is good.

Oh no! I bloody loved Tim Tams when I lived in Oz and most of the Arnotts biscuit range, ditto family.

😂 I know. But, they definitely taste better than they sound.

I you think Tim Tams are a poor imitation of a Penguin, which isn't very exciting to begin with, you don't ever want to try the Aussie version of a Crunchie. That's on a whole other level of disappointment.

It's like the Marmite/Vegemite thing all over again. Why do they want to replicate British foods and deliberately make them so much worse?

Rich tea, though they have their place they have got to be the dullest of the dull.

I'm trying to diet, ordered own brand digestives so I would only have one if desperate. Out of stock, so sent me McVities! I'm delighted and upset all at the same time.

How can disgusting own brand digestives be out of stock?

It's January, clearly everyone else has had the same idea

They were probably designed to throw at rats rather than eat, by the sound of it!!! 🤣

Most mass-produced biscuits are underwhelming and miserable. It's a bit easier for cakes to get away with being production line affairs but biscuits need to be slightly misshapen and baked with love.

I present M&S's extremely chocolatey biscuit selection as a counter to that argument.

Not just any old mass-produced biscuits, M&S mass-produced biscuits! But I shall defer judgement until I try one (or two).

See, I find them to fall short of my standards for 'extremely'. 'Fairly chocolatey' or even 'acceptably chocolatey' (for some of the selection), perhaps. Orders of magnitude better than Rich Tea though.