To think I simply can’t go on a car journey with my 3.5 month old?

[AtWitsEnd2025]

I’m currently parked up on a roadside with a screaming DS. Inconsolable. I’ve changed his nappy on the back seat it’s not that. He was fed 40 mins ago. I’ve offered him boob on the back seat and he doesn’t want it. He’s crying his eyes out. Dummy not helping. I’ve assembled the pram to see if lying flat helped it didn’t. DH standing and bouncing him on the pavement in the rain helped a little.

in the end we’ve decided to put him back in the car seat and drive the ten mins home. He is SCREAMING.

what do we do? What if we were on a motorway?

we can’t calm him, and pulling over to change him and offer boob isn’t possible on the hard shoulder!

My daughter did this pretty much from birth. Once she got to about 18 months it progressed to projectile vomiting fairly soon into a journey. By 2 years and 2 months I gave up and turned her forward facing. I think in hindsight the crying may have been nausea/discomfort. She still gets poorly forward facing but it does take her longer and she’s happy enough on short journeys and old enough now to take phenergen on longer journeys.
I know this doesn’t help much now as you can’t turn him forward or Medicate him but I think there might be things you can put on the car to reduce sickness? Or baby sea bands perhaps?

That's why we take public transport. He loves it.

My daughter was like this. I remember driving 5 hours to Cornwall with her screaming/sleeping/screaming/sleeping. She’s 15 now and is talking about getting her provisional driving license so it didn’t scar her for life.
I can pretty much laugh about it now… <twitches>

Agreed.

We had this and it was constipation. Hopefully your home or at your destination by now. Its a horrible feeling.

Me too. Some babies are just like this. It sucks OP.

Is this new for him? Just soldier on and get him in a sling when you’re home. If it’s tiredness/wind that will sort both.

x

iPad/tablet- Miss Rachel or dancing fruit on YouTube. Plastic wallet tied around head rest for tablet to sit in. The ONLY way I could survive car journeys without being an anxious mess. I know many will think this is a terrible idea but it changed my life 😂. My DC is now fantastic in the car and doesn't need the iPad for any journeys, which was my worry!

My daughter was generally like this but on one occasion she went completely hysterical when I tried to drive with her in the car seat - turns out she wasn’t well so maybe worth making sure there’s nothing else bothering your little one.

Lots of babies just don’t like car seats and will make their displeasure known. If they are fed and clean and you really need to go somewhere then tbh the only option is to let them yell and ignore it til you get there.

Ear plugs in the drivers glove box.

Seriously, sometimes you need to get somewhere and it's safer to block them out than be distracted.

Oh god I feel you! I have a 9 month old and even now if she starts to feel tired and she feels like the car is putting her to sleep she is hysterical, it's like she's annoyed that the motion is putting her to sleep 🤣 when she was younger the only thing that helped us was getting rid of the baby car seat that can click on to the pram and get her a big one (not sure if it was reflux related as she had severe reflux) she was much better after we did this. Also she isn't keen on the dark journeys so we have a light in the back too. One day I ended up in a motorway standstill and she cried for an hour in the back but I couldn't go anywhere, I even got out just to stand beside her and try and calm her down. Let's just say with my pnd my head was on fire that day 😭 I ended up getting a white noise playlist on my phone and played it through the car, it's probably the only time in her life she's fell asleep with no motion 🤣

Both my children did this until they were about 6 months old. It was f’ing awful. They are now both 10+, and I can still recall the many many exact places we had to stop to try and console a screaming baby.
You kind of just have to try and soldier on - or stop a LOT. I promise they won’t do it forever!

My now toddler absolutely hated being in the car in the dark as a small baby. We discovered this driving home in the winter at 6pm after a christening/ afternoon party. 25mins on the motorway with him howling. Absolutely horrific. He was generally fine in the day. Another life lesson as a parent 😬
Hope you're all home and calmed down now.

My DD did this once - turned out I'd managed to fasten her nappy up with the lid of the nappy cream digging into her butt cheek. Oddly enough, I'd also changed her in the back seat of the car...

My daughters 9 months and she's been in the front with me since she was tiny. She absolutely hates the car. The airbag is off

DS did this and he turned out to be really motion sick. He was much better forward facing and in the front (with the air bag off). He's 17 now (and mostly grown out of vomiting in the car 🤣) which meant we didn't have him rear facing as a toddler because those seats didn't exist in the olden days.

I sort of agree with this, with one big exception. Some kids get motion sickness, to varying degrees, and can never enjoy car rides. It is not something that they can train themselves out of, though there are ways to lessen symptoms. It certainly has nothing to do with lack of adventure spirit.

That said, it is believed that car sickness develops after a year of age, so it's unlikely your baby is suffering from it.

My oldest was a hard-core car screamer. No matter what we did, as soon as their backside hit the car seat, that was it. Until the day Lionel Richie was playing on radio 2 and it was like they had been hypnotised. For a VERY long time, LR's greatest flaming hits was all we listened to in the car.

Said DC is now a teenager and has gotten over themselves. Thankfully.

My eldest was terrible from 3-7 months. She screamed the point she couldn't get her breath. I totally understand posters saying carry on, but I couldn't. Apart from that fact it ruined anything I was wearing because I'd just start spraying milk everywhere, I just couldn't concentrate on the road sufficiently.

We only drove with the two of us so I could be in the back and keep an eye on her properly without having to also keep an eye on the road.

She randomly chilled out around 7 months but wasn't a great traveller until she was old enough to be forward faced which we did about 15 months old (advice was different back then and I wasn't educated about RF)

My youngest was the same but with the pushchair! No bother in the car, screamed the place down in the pushchair.

So that was fun.

Sympathies though. I remember that phase and it was bloody awful.

Mine would do this. I just used to turn the radio up and soldier on.

I had this problem. I put somewhere over the rainbow by the hawaiian singer whose name escapes me and the crying stopped like magic. Worth a try when you're desperate.

we've had a couple of journeys with each of ours. It’s just a phase. We avoided long journeys but didn’t stop journeys altogether, then at least if it’s a bad one you only have to listen to the screaming for a short time. It’s horrendous, I remember ☹️

Aw OP, it's awful when they do that! We've experienced this many times. Some children hate car journeys, some are over tired, some need winding etc etc etc.

You pulled over, did what you could, and carried on. That's all you can do. Honestly, sometimes when my 3 year old has a tantrum I just have to do deep breathing and try to drive with my head ringing. If you are alone that's all you can do.

You just need to get home.

Was it late afternoon? My 5.5 month old is not a fan of car journeys from 4/5 onwards, I don't know if it's the dark, witching hour, his body digesting something, but he will scream and be totally fine (not hungry, clean nappy etc)

Funny how many posters seem to be advocating letting a 3 month old effectively cry it out!
My first wasn't great in the car but my second was awful. She'd scream so much, I found it horrific and we did just limit journeys or try and time them to nap timed. I never just let her cry, even if that meant pulling over every 10 minutes, she was just so distressed.
Both of mine were vastly improved by 5/6months. And absolutely fine in the car now, they'll happily sit for a couple of hours just chatting and looking out the window at 2 and 5yo, both still rear facing too.