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Original poster

Do you hide purchases from dh?

90 replies

Thornybush · 02/01/2025 13:19

I just got a big order delivered from the sales. Wfh but dh is off today , luckily I got a notification of delivery so I was able to run down and hide it before he saw 😅 He's always on my back about packages coming all the time but he only sees a quarter of it. lol. Anyone else?

OP posts:
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 02/01/2025 13:41

No, but TBH he seems to get more deliveries than I do!

All money is ‘ours’ anyway - always has been, and I never buy anything we can’t afford.

CheekySwan · 02/01/2025 13:48

Yes, purely because I can't bare another 'more f*cking boots, how many feet do you have, more shoes than Imelda Marcos'

Or 'More designer handbags than TK Maxx FFS, you only put your phone in it! You've already got a blue one'

I could go on but ,,,,,,,,,

OurDreamLife · 02/01/2025 13:49

No. He tells me to treat myself everytime.

MrsSkylerWhite · 02/01/2025 13:49

No, why on earth would I? I can spend my money on whatever I like.

luckylavender · 02/01/2025 13:49

Nope. I would hate to be married to someone who did this.

MrsKeats · 02/01/2025 13:49

No never.

Niki85 · 02/01/2025 13:51

Boy a lot of judgemental people here. Yes I often do hide parcels but I don't think we should. My husband can be quite controlling which is shit but rather than have another row or have to endlessly justify myself I choose peace by hiding. What he doesn't understand is that often I buy things online but particularly with clothes a lot of them go back as they don't fit - he would see a large parcel and freak out. I'm not over spending as many suggest you are here, online shopping often requires that you buy more than you keep as you can't look at it like in a shop

Simonjt · 02/01/2025 13:51

No, but if I wear something new I say I’ve had it for ages to wind him up

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 02/01/2025 13:52

No, but when I had my horse and deliveries were coming nearly every day containing things for her, I would tell DH that because I was such a good customer they were sending me things for free 😂

Original poster
Thornybush · 02/01/2025 13:53

Simonjt · 02/01/2025 13:51

No, but if I wear something new I say I’ve had it for ages to wind him up

I do this too 😅

OP posts:
AMurderofMurderingCrows · 02/01/2025 13:53

Simonjt · 02/01/2025 13:51

No, but if I wear something new I say I’ve had it for ages to wind him up

Haha, this old thing? Nah, been in the bottom of my wardrobe for ages.

Original poster
Thornybush · 02/01/2025 13:54

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 02/01/2025 13:52

No, but when I had my horse and deliveries were coming nearly every day containing things for her, I would tell DH that because I was such a good customer they were sending me things for free 😂

I must use this one for next time I get "caught" 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Thornybush · 02/01/2025 13:54

Niki85 · 02/01/2025 13:51

Boy a lot of judgemental people here. Yes I often do hide parcels but I don't think we should. My husband can be quite controlling which is shit but rather than have another row or have to endlessly justify myself I choose peace by hiding. What he doesn't understand is that often I buy things online but particularly with clothes a lot of them go back as they don't fit - he would see a large parcel and freak out. I'm not over spending as many suggest you are here, online shopping often requires that you buy more than you keep as you can't look at it like in a shop

👏

OP posts:
BobnLen · 02/01/2025 13:55

I would rather he didn't know I had bought 2 or 3 of the same thing so I get the exact size/colour I want, he doesn't understand this at all. so I am more likely to hide what is going back than coming in.

TulipTiptoer · 02/01/2025 13:56

I know friends who do this and I find it odd. I have never hidden any purchases from my DH, what I do with 'my' money is up to me!
I also know someone who couldn't buy anything for the house without checking with her husband first. Equally odd!

mygraino · 02/01/2025 13:56

No, I don't hav emy own money atm but after bills we split the leftover money between savings and us and we're both free to spend on whatever, I'd feel weird about having to hide something.

cantpullthetrigger · 02/01/2025 13:57

Yes and am sick of it!

It's my money, I am not short or compromising anything for the family, but the judgement is unbearable.

I've asked him to keep us unwelcome opinions to himself but he seems unable to hold in the eye rolls and muttering under his breath when any package arrives.

Half the time they are Amazon prime household deliveries so not even anything exciting but it's become an annoying habit with him now.

I have them delivered when he's not around, to a safe place I've set up in the bin area and sometimes use my car boot for temporary storage if needed....

rosegoldivy · 02/01/2025 13:58

Oh OP, I'm with you. Hide purchases all time and then play the "no this isn't new, or I've had this lipstick for ages"

Mostly coz I cba with him rolling his eyes and moaning about me spending money on shite. (His opinion)

Same as when i roll my eyes when he accidently declares he's spent 60quid on coffees and meal deals at work.

So swings and roundabouts. You have your meal deals and il have my deliveries thanks

Upstartled · 02/01/2025 13:58

No. We share all our finances in one bank account but in 24 years he's never raised an eyebrow about how I spend money.

Marmite27 · 02/01/2025 13:59

I did hide my purchases from DH the other day, but they were part of his birthday present.

Otherwise no, it's my money I'll spend (or waste) it on whatever I like.

Nothatgingerpirate · 02/01/2025 14:03

Why?
He isn't my fucking parent 😂

GreyBlackBay · 02/01/2025 14:04

I don't hide them but I feel embarrassed at the number of parcels that arrive.

Half the time it's house stuff - toothpaste, kitchen roll, laundry stuff are all cheaper from amazon than tesco.

I send back at least uh alf the clothes i order and dh takes them to the post office do I think any eye rolling when a parcel comes is more because he thinks its something he'll have to take back.

I do spend too much, mainly on my hobby. But we'll within budget and its me that thinks I should spend less not dh.

Op you do need joint financial goals, but you both need to agree to them.

devilspawn · 02/01/2025 14:06

Thornybush · 02/01/2025 13:31

We have young dcs so a lot of our income goes on childcare. However we both work full time and are not short on paying bills , food etc. This is my own money. However he seems to think we should save every penny for holidays and events. I disagree- I would prefer clothes to holidays. Surely we can have a happy medium 😊

I can't imagine committing to such different views on money, it would drive me insane.

I think couples work much better when they're both on the same page re spending/saving.

But as it's your own money he shouldn't be judging you on it at all.

Maddy70 · 02/01/2025 14:06

No. Why would I hide purchases? If you need to you are either being financially controlled or your spending is out of order

Mockingjay876 · 02/01/2025 14:07

Only if it is a present for dp at Christmas/ for his birthday. Otherwise no, I find it an odd thing to do and would assume anyone doing it either had a controlling dp or a shopping/ spending problem.