How/when do we stop Christmas traditions for adult DCs?

[tulippa]

DD is 20 next month, in her first year at uni, and is back for the Christmas break. We have continued with a stocking and the usual spending budget on presents as we have throughout her childhood. We also carried on with the advent house we fill each day with small chocolates which were saved up for her when she came back last week. And we're continuing with other things we've always done like films, the way we decorate the tree etc.
I was wondering yesterday how long we carry this on for? Will it be weird if we stop next year for her and carry things on for DS (16)? If we stop for both, that's not fair on DS who will miss out four years of stocking presents etc. I don't want to be wrapping stocking presents for her when she's 30.
Has anyone else encountered this and, if so, how did you manage it?

Do what we do - set a low budget & get everyone to do a stocking for someone else!

I'm 40 and currently back at home with my parents and DD whilst my house is sold. It's never stopped 😂 but we all share the magic making, including the elf for DD!

ETA we started doing secret santa for the adults in the family as we've had our own children but I usually buy for my parents as we spend the day itself together. They've probably scaled back a little for me since DD came along.

My parents stopped stockings when I was about 30, and ‘big’ presents when they retired when I was early 30s. We now do a family secret Santa between all adults, so we all get 1 gift. My Mum does still buy me an advent calendar though 😂

This has been such an eye opener for me. I have 3 kids - one an adult, two primary - and stop the year they start high school. Thought my friend was odd making them for her family Inc herself, but it seems I'm the minority!

I never intend to stop! I will do stockings for my 'kids' as long as I live!

I still do a stocking for 23 year old DS it has pants, pyjamas and lots of snacks and beers in. I did one for his GF last year as I found out she never had one as a child. I buy them advent calendars and DH buys me one. We don’t spend a huge amount though.

Christmas was for a lot of my life about going to church but I have fallen by the wayside. Though I do sometimes go to Midnight Mass.

I'm 32 and my Mum still buys me a bag of chocolate coins to fill my advent calendar at the start of December!

She also still does us both a stocking, but that's really our main gift from our parents! I think she never stopped because my brother is quite a few years younger than me so she never worked out whether it would be fair to stop together (brother would have had less years than me) or stop mine (sit and watch my brother open his...). Also some years where some of us had partners to buy us presents and others didn't! I definitely had years where I was single, doing it a bit tough in life and my stocking from my Mum brought us significant Christmas joy to my life!

Now we both have partners who are responsible for any bigger gifts and I no longer ask my parents for "big" presents and we "only" get stockings from Mum and Dad but I prefer this! I love unwrapping things like a thoughtfully chosen book, bath bomb, set of PJs, some chocolate from my parents' stockings! It's traditional for us and all things I will enjoy and use.

We carried on while DD was at home/or coming home from uni (we only have one though). She moved out a couple of weeks ago and is away with BF, so have dropped Xmas stocking. Still spending the usual budget - she is generous with presents in return so that's ok. Now have her BF to buy for (fine as he is lovely). The tree and tv watching (none of us have overly been bothered with films at Xmas) will continue to be the same, as will playing games. Haven't really got any other traditions other than tracking Santa, which I still continue to do😂

Stockings forever. It's where the Christmas chocolate/sweets go, plus the wall/desk calendar/diary, Christmas smellies, fluffy socks or gloves, and day wear perfume or cologne. Plus any other random bits.

Presents under the tree reduce but everyone is together for breakfast and stockings as tradition in our extended family.

Depends!

my sister is 46 and single parent. I’m doing a stocking for her so she feels more involved.

DH and I have agreed to pare back for one another. I’m sick of the tyranny of present giving

My mum never stopped - she just expanded it.

She now does stockings for both me and my two siblings (26-34), our partners, the grand children…and my dad because she was worried he would feel left out as the only one not to get one! The last few years we have done one for her between us as well.

If you can afford it then why stop? It’s only Christmas once a year!

Same, I'm 43 and my mum does stockings for me, my husband and 3 kids.

She's not a grown up yet so I wouldn't worry

Santa came to me until I was about 36 and my eldest child was two. I had to explain to my mum that it might be someone else's turn now.

Yeah. You have to not be the only mug dishing out the fun.

Love these threads and reading everyone’s experiences. It seems some of us will always be kids at heart ! I was thinking the same about my DS 22 who is now earning far more than I ever have and can buy himself what he likes. I thought I would scale it back and just buy a few presents but yesterday he asked if he could have an early Christmas present . This was usually the way on Xmas Eve. I thought what makes you think you have got more than one !
My mum always bought me a lot of stocking fillers to unwrap right up until she. Got dementia. She was a lovely thoughtful Mum in so many ways.

I'm 45 my Mum did me a stocking last year. She's no longer with us but had bought much of the stuff for the stockings already and we're wrapping what she bought so it will be the last one this year.

My mum handed my stocking over to DH when we got married - I was 27 😁

As others have said, it's about transition. So o don't think stockings need to stop but... do they do you a stocking, or all you doing it all? From mid-teens my sister and I have always done my mums stocking

Mine are 22 and 24 until this year we spent £150 on each plus stocking. That's been roughly the same for many years. This year I scaled it back to £100 as they are both in long term relationships and I spent £50 each on their partners (previously I spent £20 ish on them)
Eldest dd has moved into her first house with her bf so they are now doing each others stockings. I'm still doing younger dd.

I did stop advent calendars this year too although I'm still planning to do Easter eggs.

We still do stockings for ages 27-85 in our household! If you are with us on Christmas Day you get one.

my sister is 21, single and still gets a stocking. I got a stocking until I was around 20, then we brought our own house and I moved out and it became a large joint gift for me and DH. I’m 28 now and me and DH tend to get a few presents each off my mum.

my sister is still single but has also brought her own house and moved out but I believe she still gets a stocking 😂

I wouldn’t exclude your DD if you’re still doing it for your DS. It’s a cute family tradition. Once they are both in their twenties/thirties then it just shifts naturally. My mum treated me like a kid until I had my own kids and then she kind of switched it to them 🤣

❤️❤️

Both our DCs are in their 20s. DD doesn’t even live here any more and won’t be here on Christmas Day. Her full stocking and her other presents have been sent up to her! DS will still open his stocking on our bed while we video call DD so they open them together. Things may change if they have their own children in the future….

I get a stocking from my mum, I'm 51