Is this an adhd trait?

[Untery]

So someone tells you a story about something. And your effort to empathise and show understanding is that you say “omg that happened to me to “ and tell them all about your similar story just the same. Neurotypical friend thinks you are trying to hijack the conversation and make it about yourself.

You can be a cunt and ND.

Like the man with the same name as the well known chain of pie shops.

I have seen a SM reel from someone saying that this pie shop man should not say his behaviour is due to being ND... well, sometimes it is.

Is that you DH?
He does this too, it's like he's some sort of airhead and normal niceties pass him by completely. He is a very polite and well mannered man. But I lost count the number of times he told me he met x friend and I ask how are x's kids or some update about the wife, some project they were doing etc. DH says he didn't think to ask!!!!!! He simply doesn't think to ask and has zero curiosity about other people's lives. He doesn't mind if they volunteer information and he might remember it, but he never ever thinks to ask.

I think your friend seems a bit obtuse. If I was playing devils advocate I would say it might be not what you say but how you say it. Do you get overly excited when they’re telling a story and you’ve done something similar? I have ADHD but worked in sales, most of the time people focus on body language, pitch and tone of voice when having conversations.

I do this and it is certainly not a way to make the conversation about me, it's my way of connecting. I am now very aware that when I am having a conversation with a NT person they might look a little irritated by it, but a ND person will light up and share a story about themselves and it goes back and forth and makes for an enjoyable conversation.

My DP is ND and hates people switching the conversation to them.
It is an individual thing.

Isn't this empathy and sharing normal human experiences?

I would say maybe the adhd element is to then talk and dominate it? Without giving space for the other person to carry on and space for their feelings?

I'd feel a bit silly if I was talking to someone about some random thing which had happened to them but they didn't interject and tell me and I wonder if not sharing the moment is also neuro diverse

But it's not switching the conversation to make it all about me, it's sharing and going back and forth. Switching the whole conversation to yourself when someone is trying to tell you something is something very different and I can understand why he wouldn't like that.

Sharing back and forth is the natural flow of conversation.

ok

I used to have a tendency to “match” any stories with a similar - but slightly more funny/crazy - story about myself.

I have learned to stop doing it and let other people have their moment.