Bridesmaid etiquette?!

[Kelrick]

Hello! I recently asked one of my best friends to be my bridesmaid, we’ve known each other for 20 years! We have discussed all things wedding and how to involve me three kids etc, it’s all feeling very special!!

She has now said she’s been asked to be a bridesmaid for a girl she used to hate and now they are ‘acquaintance's’ as this girl drinks in the pub my best friend works in, I kind of laughed when she told me until she said she was serious and actually considering it🙈

This girl wants her wedding around the same time as me and I feel like she should be saying no😬 in my head I’m thinking does she just say yes to anyone that asks her to be a bridesmaid? Is my bridal party going to be compromised because her head will be half with me now and half with her? Is there not some sort of bridesmaid etiquette that you jsut don’t say yes to being one while you are already one?!

Gosh .... this is a bit bridezilla! Of course she can be bridesmaid for another friend as well!

In the old days when I got married the bridesmaids went out for the hen party and helped the bride on the day.

These days they seem to be expected to be permanently on call for 18-24 months.

Bring back the old days.

Is there not some sort of bridesmaid etiquette that you jsut don’t say yes to being one while you are already one?!

No 😂 why would that be the case??

Also, what do you mean "while you are already one"? It's not a full time job. She's not being a bridesmaid from now until your wedding. She isn't one today, she's going to be one.

Unless the weddings are the same weekend, it’s not an issue.

being a bridesmaid should not be such a commitment that doing it twice in a season is a problem.

No. It's not a job that has contractual requirements. It's a social thing. If you're expecting that much of a bridesmaid that you think she can't be a bridesmaid at another wedding a few weeks before or after your wedding then instead of having friends to play a part in your day pay for staff.

I've heard some bonkers bride requests in my time, but this is Up There with the most bonkers!

Get a grip!

This honestly sounds like childish drama. What your friend does in her other friendships is none of your business, she doesn’t owe you and your wedding her undivided attention

You really don't sound mature enough to be getting married.

“Is my bridal party going to be compromised” lol

Unless they’re on the same day it’s fine! Like a pp said, it’s not a full time job!

Exactly. OP, are you confusing ‘being a bridesmaid’ with ‘being the global CEO of Toyota’?

Oh wow you really need to get a grip in the nicest way possible. My MOH is also my step sisters and her wedding is 2 months before mine (both abroad) and it didn’t even cross my mind that she should say no to her because she already said yes to me!!

You mean she doesn't have an exclusivity clause written into her bridesmaid contract? What were you thinking OP?!

Oh, yeah. Neglectful, OP. Have your agent call her agent ASAP!

In the nicest possible way you need to get some perspective on this. It’s really no big deal.

This is absolutely crazy. Are you an adult? It is the kids of thing my 6 year old would come out with and I'd tell her she's being ridiculous unless the wedding is the same day then you really need to stop this crazy thinking.

😂

Of course she can be a bridesmaid to another bride. Just not on the same day.

You should voice your concerns to her OP.... that way she'll be forewarned that, since getting engaged (assuming you were sane before hand), you have totally lost your mind and she can beat a hasty retreat.

Is the wedding going to be on the same day as yours? If not, there really is no compromise to be made. I recently got married, and have three children in my their teens/twenties, and to be honest the bridesmaids were involved in choosing their outfits, and a few other bits and pieces, and they organised the hen do, but my (now) DH and I did the rest of the organisation and decision making for the wedding because it was OUR day, and so we did all the work for it, and we enjoyed every minute of it. Will your partner really want your bridesmaid heavily involved in the organisation at the expense of his/her involvement?

Hahaha OP you crazy bride. Stop now before she quits and runs herself.

Stop being so entitled ridiculous. So long as the wedding isn't on the same day as yours, of course she can be somebody else's bridesmaid.

🤣🤣🤣

Unless the other wedding is the exact same weekend as yours you need to stop being so entitled and self-centred and get over yourself!

This can't be real 🤣🤣
OP she's being your bridesmaid for one day. That doesn't entitle you to her undivided attention for every day until then. She should be around for the hen party and the wedding, maybe a couple of other things in-between, like dress fittings etc. But thats it.
She is absolutely within her rights to be anyone else's bridesmaid. You sound jealous that she's going to be giving another bride some attention not just you. Get a grip!

Kindly, no it’s fine. I was bridesmaid for my friend A along with friend B. A month later friend A and friend B were my bridesmaids. Should I have asked friend B to choose?! As long as they are not on the same day it’s fine.