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Original poster

Zoe Ball....sorry for her loss but the general public don't receive 950K per year and get tiled to take an indefinite length of bereavement leave

212 replies

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 05:35

I have had a period of bereavement leave (2 weeks) after the death of my father. Given the nature of deadlines at work I had to send emails during that period.

Am I right to question Zoe Ball paid by the licence fee payers being told to take 'as much time as you want' on a vast salary?.Does this show a good between the celeb existence and that of us mere worker drones?

OP posts:
beenwhereyouare · 21/09/2024 06:50

THisbackwithavengeance · 21/09/2024 06:13

I agree with you OP.

Taking an extended bereavement leave after the unexpected loss of a spouse or loss of a child = to be expected and encouraged.

Taking an extended bereavement leave after the fully expected death of an elderly and ill parent = taking the piss. A former colleague of mine took 6 months sick when her 95 year old dad finally passed after many years bedridden and suffering from every illness under the sun. We were all Hmm

@THisbackwithavengeance Were you absent the day they handed out kindness and compassion?

@mids2019 I'm sorry for your loss, but tbh you're not coming across very well, either. You are NOT right to question the length of time Zoe Ball (or anyone else) needs to grieve and adjust. You don't know her situation, everyone is different in how they are able to handle things, and it makes me wonder if you were treated poorly when your father died. I hope you feel better

Dolliesdisasterousdayout · 21/09/2024 06:53

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 06:47

I am not bitter about Zoe per se, it's the fact that some people are offered more employer empathy than others. People do lose parents and people all feel the loss in very complex ways but there is an inconsistency with how employers deal with this.

I wish we could all have compassionate employers who wouldnt want to us back at work soon but may be that isn't the case. I think there is a human empathy for the loss but you can still feel there is one rule for some and one rule for others. Maybe I should have entitled the post do you agree that bereqvmwnt/stress leave is inconsistent.

As the realisation of what an absolutely awful thing you have posted is dawning maybe you should ask for the thread to be deleted?

Trying really hard to not say what is on the tip of my tongue because it’s silly o’clock

New2thisshizzle · 21/09/2024 06:53

It’s pointless comparing any part of your job to a celeb. I don’t have an issue with bereavement leave but I do think it’s ridiculous that she earns 950k a year!

Loopytiles · 21/09/2024 06:54

Your OP is awful

You sound angry about NHS terms and conditions - fair enough. Sick leave is available but some employers do act if sick leave is high so there is risk taking it.

presumably you understand the basics of capitalism?

weird to complain about an individual with a different employer in another field who has a very high paying job and contract that v few people have.

Simonjt · 21/09/2024 06:56

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 06:47

I am not bitter about Zoe per se, it's the fact that some people are offered more employer empathy than others. People do lose parents and people all feel the loss in very complex ways but there is an inconsistency with how employers deal with this.

I wish we could all have compassionate employers who wouldnt want to us back at work soon but may be that isn't the case. I think there is a human empathy for the loss but you can still feel there is one rule for some and one rule for others. Maybe I should have entitled the post do you agree that bereqvmwnt/stress leave is inconsistent.

NHS workers get more than most people in the private sector, so why aren’t you also expressing upset or bitter that you would typically receive ten more days than the average private sector employee? Unless your a hypocrit you should be bitter that you yourself would be in an extremely lucky position regarding bereavement leave compared to most.

WeAreNotCookingTheSpoon · 21/09/2024 06:56

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 06:20

Maybe I am just a bit raw with seeing bereavement policy being used inconsistently in the NHS. Making decisions about how long for a paeent, grandoarent, aunt, uncle fiend etc. I get stress is a medical condition but aren't all bereaved people stressed by defintion?

Then they all have the option to get signed off sick.

different bereavements will affect people differently. Like I said I had six weeks off after my dad died, partly I’m sure because he died at home with me caring for him as the hospice was full and it was horrendous. I didn’t take a single day off when my mum died, i couldn’t stand her!

happinessischocolate · 21/09/2024 06:58

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 05:59

I am sorry but working in the NHS there is a two week bereavement leave policy and I know managers do have to enforce this as it becomes an inconsistent policy over the whole work force Yes there should be better bereavement leave but it does stick a little in people's throats when those that are I. High profile large salary jobs get a sympathy greater than the general public.

If course bereavement is horrible so maybe the problem is that double standards and the BBC.

The company I work for gives no bereavement leave at all. If you're lucky and they're in a good mood you may get the rest of the day paid if you go home after hearing about your parents death that day but after that you're expecting to come back to work or not get paid.

Maybe in your race to the bottom the NHS should do the same, why should you get paid when I didn't.

Viewfrommyhouse · 21/09/2024 06:59

Blimey. It really is a race to the bottom for some folk, isn't it?

WhoOfWhoville · 21/09/2024 07:00

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 05:59

I am sorry but working in the NHS there is a two week bereavement leave policy and I know managers do have to enforce this as it becomes an inconsistent policy over the whole work force Yes there should be better bereavement leave but it does stick a little in people's throats when those that are I. High profile large salary jobs get a sympathy greater than the general public.

If course bereavement is horrible so maybe the problem is that double standards and the BBC.

I also work in the NHS, I took six months off after my 25yo sibling died in his sleep.

I got signed off by the GP, and nobody ever questioned it.

Being quite frank, I was so deep in my grief I found it almost impossible to give the slightest shit about anyone else’s problems, maybe the really serious stuff I did, I still cared that people had cancer or died. But I had zero tolerance for Karen behaviour we see in the NHS sometimes, the people kicking off because they’ve not managed to con another Methadone/Morphine/Codeine prescription out of the system, those demanding they absolutely must have an urgent appointment as they’re flying in 2 hours and they don’t want to pay for a certain medication over the counter and insist it must be on prescription.

In fact, some of them I absolutely could not rationalise that they got to live, and yet my baby brother was dead. There was no fucking sense in it.

And even on top of all that, his death absolutely rocked my faith in my own skills and competence, that somehow, the mere fact that someone you love can just go to fucking bed and be taken from you, I was blindsided by it, and the fact that there was NOTHING I could have done to train for it or prevent it. That you can know so many things, medicine can be so advanced, I personally have saved whole actual lives, people who don’t even know that I did that for them - because they were unconscious at the time, etc. That there was still nothing I could have done to prevent him dying, no matter how hard you train, however well you know your shit, no matter how many lives you save, how many pulses you get back, some of them will just be snatched from you before you even realise what’s happened.

So yeah, I needed fucking six months off work.

Cattyisbatty · 21/09/2024 07:01

I only took 1.5 weeks, because being at work and keeping busy helped. What was I going to do at home except mope about, dh was at work and I didn’t have dc yet? But everyone is different and my job was in an office, not public facing, not as a happy dj!

Freysimo · 21/09/2024 07:02

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 05:59

I am sorry but working in the NHS there is a two week bereavement leave policy and I know managers do have to enforce this as it becomes an inconsistent policy over the whole work force Yes there should be better bereavement leave but it does stick a little in people's throats when those that are I. High profile large salary jobs get a sympathy greater than the general public.

If course bereavement is horrible so maybe the problem is that double standards and the BBC.

Has the NHS policy changed then? When my son died, I was told to take as much time as I liked. As it happened, I took three weeks because I wanted to get back, but many colleagues took a lot longer when they had a bereavement. Everyone is different.

Cattyisbatty · 21/09/2024 07:03

So sorry @WhoOfWhoville - that is really rough.

llamali · 21/09/2024 07:03

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 06:33

Maybe my frustration should be directed towards t and c generally across society for such things as stress and bereavement lewve.

Yes. It should. Campaign to make it better for everyone not to take things away from those who are fortunate to be supported.

Gunnersforthecup · 21/09/2024 07:05

When I was working in the NHS, I was called by my boss on the way back from my mother's funeral and told I was rescheduled to work for the entire weekend, in a very responsible capacity, from the day after the funeral.

But I definitely think that Zoe Ball should be shown some compassion here.

Stixk · 21/09/2024 07:06

THisbackwithavengeance · 21/09/2024 06:13

I agree with you OP.

Taking an extended bereavement leave after the unexpected loss of a spouse or loss of a child = to be expected and encouraged.

Taking an extended bereavement leave after the fully expected death of an elderly and ill parent = taking the piss. A former colleague of mine took 6 months sick when her 95 year old dad finally passed after many years bedridden and suffering from every illness under the sun. We were all Hmm

You sound lovely .

Not 🙄

sherbertcandy · 21/09/2024 07:06

What was the saying ....if you can be anything in life, be kind!

gamerchick · 21/09/2024 12:02

My work place has 5 days. When my daughter died I had to use up my AL.i can keep a low profile at work though and not he 'on display'

I couldn't imagine having to be on telly facing the world in that position. You can't compare your job to hers. Sorry man. There's no way I'm going to begrudge anyone wanting to grieve away from the cameras.

lapochette · 21/09/2024 12:09

I get one week bereavement leave at my work and have lost both parents. I do not begrudge Zoe a longer leave entitlement than I had. I hope she takes as long as she needs. It's not a race to the bottom.

SusieBBB · 21/09/2024 12:12

This is such a nasty OP. What sort of people wake up one day and decides to post this crap?

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 21/09/2024 12:14

Not RTFT but read enough. Pure nastiness.

2024intake · 21/09/2024 12:16

I really miss hearing lovely Zoe in the mornings and I hope she is ok. We all process grief differently. I started a new job a couple of weeks after losing a parent. For me it was easier than being at home and helped distract me, but I have friends who are still struggling years after losing a parent. I’m glad for Zoe that the bbc are giving her the time she needs.

TimelyIntervention · 21/09/2024 12:17

mids2019 · 21/09/2024 06:33

Maybe my frustration should be directed towards t and c generally across society for such things as stress and bereavement lewve.

Yes, it should. Your OP was downright nasty.

The likelihood is she’s now on sick leave, not bereavement leave. Which is absolutely none of our business. I’ve had colleagues take six (paid) months off sick after a bereavement.

And as for the people who think they can gatekeep other people’s grief according to your view of who is worth mourning… you are being horrible people.

Shinyandnew1 · 21/09/2024 12:20

In my sector it is very much the norm to take 6 weeks+ for bereavement, you may have a shitty employer but the rest of us don’t.

I wish my sector was as compassionate as yours. I am a teacher and we are allowed 5 days.

GrandesRandonnees · 21/09/2024 12:22

Direct your ire at your employer for their rubbish bereavement leave, not Zoe Ball - how is it her fault?

While I am sorry for your own loss, your post is nasty.

MrsGhastlyCrumb · 21/09/2024 12:26

I got about 4 days when my dad died, 2 days for the funeral (it was a half day's journey away) and previous little sympathy or empathy. I wish everyone was treated kindly but unfortunately that doesn't happen.