Do you and DP message throughout the day?

[december2020]

A very random one but I was thinking how when DH and I were younger (pre marriage and kids) we messaged all the time throughout the day.
Now - not so much, unless there is news, coordinating schedules, kids or similar.

From my POV it's not a bad thing. I feel a lot more confident and sure in myself than I did when I was younger, where I maybe had a lot less self confidence.

But it got me thinking, am I weird. Should we be messaging throughout the day. Or is this normal.

As to not to drip feed, no issues between DH and I. Yes normal disagreements here and there but generally a very happy and supportive relationship.

Sometimes, but usually to pick something up on way home 🤣

Yeah it's mostly just logistics.

God no! At a push it's to tell him to get the washing in because it's raining, or ask him to get loo roll on the way home!

Mine has just been away for a week and we messaged once. We catch up in person I don’t need updates through the day.

Mostly shopping lists for rhe way home....

Just logistics.

but yes once upon a time when we both had undemanding temp jobs we used to send each other long emails etc during the day!

Yes, we'll send maybe two or three text's. Always around mid morning to lunchtime and again late afternoon or when I'm heading for the train.
Something we've always done, if whatever your doing feels right to you that's all that matters

I honestly don't think there's a right or wrong here if you're both happy.

DH and I message back and forth occasionally through the day. Nothing groundbreaking, just asking "how's your day going?" or sending a picture of the dog doing something idiotic or something. The same level of communication I have with my pals really, since he is in fact my best pal.

But I don't think more or less communication than that is bad, it's just whatever works for each couple isn't it? As long as no one is smothering anyone or making anyone feel ignored, all's well.

Occasionally, but when both working we do try to speak on the phone at lunchtime, just for 5-10 mins.

Nope. Unless logistically necessary.

It drives me mad that people in my office don't seem to have a message function and will only call their partners!

We WhatsApp logistical stuff but my husband always phones to see how my day is going. He's very sweet.

I call dh a few times during the day and he calls me when he's dropped ds off at school.
He's terrible at reading messages so have to call instead.

Yes, very often. Sometimes a reminder to pick a child up or get shopping or whatever. General boring news like fuck, I have to be in the office next Friday. Sometimes an actually interesting 'you'll NEVER guess who I just bumped into' type message.

And I often message dh random things like 'ds3 has to take £2 to school on Tuesday' - just because my memory is awful so I like to double our chances of it being remembered!

Yes. Gifs, maths memes, updates. We don't need to but I suppose it's habit to keep each other informed of our movements.

Our conversation from today had roughly 30 messages (a mix of gifs, screenshots, a shopping list and actual information). Because of meetings etc it is easier to message than phone.

Kids pick ups. Snacks I want. Memes. If I've run out of coke zero 😂

Yes we still do. Been together nearly 22 years and have two kids. We're generally in touch many times throughout the day.
Nothing wrong if you're not though!

Sometimes for practical reasons but your op comes across as neediness and that to me is not healthy

At work I want to focus on work and I presume dh does too

Yes, we Teams chat generally. Mostly things that we think will cheer each other up plus family logistic stuff too.

Used to - hundreds of messages, all day every day, an unbroken conversation.

Now...no, not really.

Life got in the way I guess.

Logistics and the dreaded 'what's for lunch?". You know what there is: please stop asking me and expecting me to make it (WFH days)

Yeah we do. Logistics stuff like everyone else has said, general how’s your day going etc. He asks how the cat is. Sometimes the kids get mentioned. Oh and recipes, we send each other food ideas.

Sometimes we do, sometimes we don't. Depends on the day and what we're doing. If I'm driving in the day I might call for a chat or we'll have the endless conversation about what's for dinner.

Sometimes we'll send memes or dog photos.

We don't need to be in constant contact, neither is needy or anything but he's my favourite person so I like messaging him.

Yes mixture of ‘Love you’ and asking for a favours like pick up a takeaway/snacks, reminders re chores etc

A couple of texts most days.

Either about DC. Or if one of us has something big at work the other will check it's gone OK. One of us bragging if we got a nice snack/work lunch.

If there's not been something like that maybe a quick 'How's your day' sent mid-afternoon.

Then once it's closer to the end of the day we'll text about who's picking up DC/if anything's needed for dinner.

Nope, very rarely unless something happens and we need to let each other know. DH is in a high pressure job and is generally very busy in meetings all day. Even when he works from home I don't see much of him, I usually take him in a few cuppas during the day and a sandwich if he's really busy! When he's away, we usually text to say goodnight.