What do you make of this email response

[Yikitty]

Email sent by newish member of staff to senior staff member - 4 others cc’d in

Reasonable run of the mill email - enquiring about confirming a date. Email first line is “I hope you are well”

response:

”You don’t need to ask me if I am well every-time you email me unless you know something I don’t. Yes”

I never said it was the same @angeldelite but @Spirallingdownwards asked me why I put small talk in my emails and so I explained. Lots of people have said they do, lots have said they don’t. It’s, you know, a conversation.

Yes, it’s a conversation, so I explained your situation is different, because the idea of starting an email to senior leadership that you don’t know with ‘I hope you’re enjoying the sunshine, hope you had a nice weekend or something equally bland’ is cringeworthy.

Christ yes I know it’s different. I only explained because someone quoted me asked me why I did it. So I explained.

I copied from someone I got an email from a couple of years ago who had the correct response:
Dear A I hope you are well. Please can you do x,y,z

Dear B Thanks, and likewise. I will do x,y,z by tomorrow

Both just social niceties, not asking anything personal nor needing to share any.
Job done

What's wrong with a simple 'Good morning/afternoon' or 'Hello'? That is polite.

Enquiries about someone's health and wellness aren't - you're not expected to respond with anything more than 'fine, and you?' - so it's meaningless.

Why is it inappropriate?.

I need to tell a (male and senior) colleague of mine that. He opens most emails with "I hope you are VERY well" (my capitalisation).

I am not sure that I agree with micro-managing someone's communication style to this degree.

I am blunt by nature which is probably why I specifically make an effort to say "hope you are well" before I go into "where's the document I asked for".

And as I said above, if you are blunt, you get criticised for that as well, especially if you are female.

Maybe people could just let it wash over them and get on with the job.

If someone is actually rude (I mean, rude, rather than direct and to the point) then moan. Otherwise, just get on with your work!

I suppose it’s marginally more tolerable than “I hope this email finds you well” which makes my toes curl.

Years ago I signed a note to instructing solicitors “kind regards”. The next time he spoke to me he said it made me sound like a fool and if I signed a note like that again I would no longer be instructed.

I took the view that id rather people think me rude than foolish so no niceties from me.

I say kind regards too.

Maybe this is why I'm so terrible at my job.

I think this was coincidental, rather than attributable to my influence so I can take no credit for that (and I do actually work with socio-linguists).But it's an example of what a number of women working together, albeit perhaps not always consciously so, can achieve!

As you might have guessed we have to deal with a lot of sex-based discrimination - sometimes unfortunately worse - in my profession. To my mind any small thing we can do to resist that ingrained culture is a positive thing.

I think the person who wrote the original IHYAW should review a few emails from others to see the tone / culture of the workplace.

Where I work, it's straight to the point, no niceties required. Someone writing IHYAW would stand out, and it would be seen as an irritant.

However, if everyone else does the same, then the recipient is being a bit of a dick, but I'd take note, and address them differently.

I think the response is incredibly rude, so I would have to be rude back in a very passive aggressive way.

I would definitely respond with 'duly noted' as someone else suggested and would forever more email this person starting just with their name, no hello or dear.

I think the senior staff’s response was rude but saying ‘I hope you’re well’ in every interaction is not going to do you any favours in the workplace.

Really? Have I missed something? Is it now somehow on the level of making a broad innuendo about someone’s sex life, slapping them on the arse and laughing like Sid James?

Well….funny thing, just received an email opening line “hope you are well” I did laugh..after telling them they are stupid and how dare they ask me such an inane and intrusive question

It's comes across very rude! If I generously give them the benefit of the doubt I would suspect it's a cultural or neurodiversity thing. Some of my autistic or non-British colleagues are blunt but you know they aren't meaning to be rude. But either way, it may be best dealt with by the line manager with some feedback and coaching on communication style and expectations, rather than responding with anything equally rude or passive aggressive. No one will learn anything that way.

I put the phrase in emails all the time, even though I'm not a massive fan. I also receive it a lot. I just skim over it and know the person is writing it because, just like me, they don't know how else to pleasantly start off an email. I'm trying to reduce the frequency that I write it and get better at going straight to the point.

exactly! how slow are these people typing / reading that 4 words takes any sort of measurable time. Even if it's in every single email they receive, that's, what, 10, 20 seconds worth of time er day "wasted"?

what a pathetic thing to get worked up about!

I often start letters and emails with "I hope all is well with you [and your family]". It is meant sincerely and I really don't understand how people can take offence at something so well meant.

If it were in a business setting, though, I don't think I would include it in a communication, but I wouldn't take offence if someone else did it.

I like silentassasin's suggested response.

It’s very rude. But we have a colleague who is incredibly polite to the point where we had to say something along the same lines but it was delivered in person and hopefully it sounded a lot less hurtful.

Well they didn't ask how he is (presuming the twatish response was a man)
I would be very tempted to reply:

Hi Wanker

I wasn't asking how you are, simply stating that I hope you are well.
Apologies for any upset I have caused, I will ensure that I no longer convey such sentiments towards you going forward.

Regards

Typical of some insecure senior staff.

Ha! I use that all the time because I was once told my emails were too curt.
the reply seems to indicate someone who is a little unhappy because it’s a small and mean reply. Ignore.

Very rude.

I don't write generic fluff in emails, but it doesn't bother me if I'm sent a fluffy email.

I was taught to type at school, and waffle in letters was standard....I look forward to receiving your swift response... The content of your letter has been noted blah blah.

Times have changed, but manners will never be old fashioned.

That is incredibly rude, especially sent to a senior member of staff copying people in. Wow.

“Hope you are well” is a standard polite business speak. And helps to stop emails sounding too harsh or abrupt.

This kind of remark is so cringeworthy; he sounds like he’s stuck in the Edwardian times!

It’s not welcomed by everyone. I would be annoyed by the routine ‘hope you are well’ message in the workplace to. Receiver is frustrated by this. Knock it off.