What do you make of this email response

[Yikitty]

Email sent by newish member of staff to senior staff member - 4 others cc’d in

Reasonable run of the mill email - enquiring about confirming a date. Email first line is “I hope you are well”

response:

”You don’t need to ask me if I am well every-time you email me unless you know something I don’t. Yes”

@MaidOfAle tell me you don't suffer from anxiety without telling me you suffer from anxiety.

I need the 'noise words' so I don't lie awake at night thinking that someone hates me and I can never speak to them again.

So maybe everyone just needs to not be so vicious to people who are just trying their best.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5156451-what-do-you-make-of-this-email-response?reply=137999562 from this thread is an example of someone who admits to not actually meaning it.

"...hell give me a black mark in my end of year review if you're @Another2Cats 🤣"

Yes, and when that feeds into you getting a "meets expectations" rather than "exceeds expectations" or even "fails to meet expectations" and that has a real, meaningful, impact on how much of a pay rise you get it suddenly becomes very real indeed.

I thought it was funny, very dry sense of humour

Anxiety is fitted as standard with autism.

Given that someone on this thread has admitted that their use of "I hope you are well" is insincere, you cannot rely on its presence as evidence that they care about you.

People lie all the time, it's one of humanity's worst features. You cannot trust anything anyone says, let alone "I hope you are well". Trust no one, it's the only way.

by going straight in with your business ask you are treating the recipient like a machine and that this is rude.

By getting to the point immediately, I am treating my colleague like a human whose one life is too short to waste reading fluff.

Moody much. Unnecessary on her part.

Yes, the problem is called "autism". I am very good at the technical aspects of my job dealing with hardware and software but struggle with the fleshware units.

Fleshware is a geek joke BTW.

What a shitty reply. That would put me right off working there

This, so much this. I hate all the fluff. I know what is required when people ask directly for stuff.

I'm working with Marketing at the moment to put a campain for a project together. It's been so hard to understand what actually is requested and what they will do because the ask is so ambiguas and dressed up in plesantries. Tell me what you want, please don't waffle.

ND Dyslexic, Dyspraxic, possibly more.

Performance, deliverables and objectives are all key measures. But if somebody is, perhaps, borderline on these things then subjective matters can very much come into play.

An employee who is borderline between, depending on what terminology your company uses, say "exceeds expectations" and "meets expectations" but who I find personally to be very annoying and difficult to get on with I would likely grade as "meets expectations" rather than exceeds.

If they clearly exceeded the measures then it would not be an issue at all. It only comes to a head in the borderline situations.

Also @Woodenwonder and @Ilovelurchers

You definitely shouldn't be a manager if you think this is a relevant subjective factor.

hahhaaaaa you are a one @Another2Cats 🤣

This is a good response 👏

One of my key suppliers emails me monthly with “ I hope your well”, I reply frequently with thanks - hope you’re well too ( the email is just notifying me a report is complete) but the penny never drops. 🥹

No. The correct response is:
Duly noted, cunt.

At 7pm during a major incident, I am as you humans say "running on fumes" and have nothing left. Yet the remote access server for the lab instruments remains mine to fix, despite your misassessment of me as incompetent at my job. I am good with machines.

As I said earlier in thread, I have skipped important information because I am so used to people's first paragraph being fluff that I have skipped to the second paragraph where I expect the real information to start. Just as you automatically skip past the paid adverts in the Google results page to get to the real results.

mind-resources

When I cannot remember a word, I make one up from words that I can remember. This is part of how my autism manifests. I suspect that it's deemed rude to make fun of a disabled person's coping tactics. Certainly, I think it's mean-spirited.

Today was difficult and I am getting double-vision now, so signing off for tonight.

It is rude but I’m also quietly acknowledging that it’s a reply I wish I could give. I don’t like twee, meaningless pleasantries - it doesn’t make me like you or more likely to do whatever it is you’ve asked, it makes me think you’re a simpering idiot.

What a ray of sunshine. you sound like the sort of person that if you did like me, I'd worry what company I was keeping.

'I hope you are well' is nowhere near as annoying as the highfalutin supervillain tone some people take to show how above boring normies they are.

That is very tame compared to some of the emails I got early in my career.
One would rather not get an email like that but you won’t be doing the new joiner any favours by the encouraging them to make a big deal out of it.

When I get emails starting with I hope you're well I'm sorely tempted to reply with exactly what kind of day I'm having with my assorted health issues.

Personally I find it patronising and un necessary. Let's fact it The sender doesn't care how I am

I generally add a ‘hope you’re well?’ unless it’s someone I’ve already communicated with in the last day or two. I appreciate niceties and don’t agree that they’re necessarily meaningless. Personally, I really don’t like emails simply asking me to do something - I’m a human being, not a machine to be fed instructions - so treat others the same way.

You're very welcome.