What does one wear to a funeral these days?

[rivertine]

I'm mid-twenties.

Have a funeral coming up, I have no way of contacting the family of anybody else going, to ask what the dress code is.

Do I wear black? Trousers? A skirt?

Please help!

Black anything I think. No one tends to focus on guest outfits in my experience.

Unless they have specifically said they want everybody to wear bright colours
I would just wear black or grey .

I went to a funeral in June. Onsite a back shirt dress with a white criss cross pattern.

Unless specifically told otherwise, black. Dark grey or navy at a push. Smart, doesn't matter if it's a dress, skirt or trousers.

If in doubt, wear black...trousers, dress or skirt are all fine. A jacket/blazer too. Smart or smart/casual

Just anything darkish will do, skirt or trousers, dark jacket or cardigan or wrap is fine.
I once attended one that had specified bright colours so turned up in a purple patterned skirt and pink top. Only one other person wore colours, everyone else in black/grey/navy. Won’t make that mistake again.

If the family haven't specified a colour then very dark, modest clothing is suitable. I generally wear a work dress and jacket. I have it in my head to reserve full black for the closest family.

Depends on where the funeral is. Where I live (Ireland) most people, including family, don't wear black any more. It would be very unusual for a non-family member to wear black and would be considered to be a bit OTT.

Clean, neat and not overly bright colours would be the norm. Older people are more likely to wear smart clothes like a suit/jacket. Trousers, dress or skirt would be the norm for most people but jeans wouldn't be unusual at the removal ( the bit we have the evening before the burial).

I'd say err on the side of reasonably smart and a dark or muted colour and you'll be fine

Personally I like to dress it up for a funeral. I have a navy shift dress that can be totally formal, or worn with different colour shoes/jacket etc if the family want less formal.

I would wear something in a dark colour that I could use again, if I didn't know the family's wishes. An elderly relative died recently and I wore a navy dress with white spots. But more frequently I attend funerals where they request no black so I just wear something smart.

I’m in England and all the funerals I’ve been to recently have been formal and dark clothes. Men in suits/ties/shirts and women in dark dresses or trousers and tops.

It was smarter than I had anticipated and I felt a touch scruffy.

My usual funeral wear is black trousers, navy or grey jacket or cardigan, neutral colour top. In my family/social circles, all black isn't usual or expected, but I know it varies.

Main thing is not to attract attention. So - extreme example - if your one black outfit is a super short, super tight, low cut dress you'd wear to a nightclub, don't wear it to a funeral.

It wasn't you who was mistaken!

At funerals in my family of people who've died at a ripe old age, black is the exception rather than the rule. If I was going to one for someone else and didn't know the family's preference, I'd wear something black or navy. Trousers, skirt or dress, anything decent really.

I've been to a few funerals over the last couple of years. As a rule, dark clothes and relatively smart. I wore a dark grey/black dress with a black jacket to the last one, my sister was in a navy blue shift dress with a jacket and the MIL of the person who died was wearing black trousers and a white top with a black smart cardigan.

I think the key point is that it's subdued - so nothing flashy, nothing that stands out. Just basic, sober clothes.

I went to a funeral last year and my Nana (who has been to several in recent years) said people don't often wear black much anymore. Just smart clothes, and not outlandish patterns unless they say smart. I was one of the few wearing black at the one I went to tbh.

Dark, comfortable, and tidy.

The last one I went to, a black skirt, black and cream top, a black & brown trench coat, brown heeled boots and a soft pink scarf. It was November.

The last funeral I went to everyone was requested to wear florals, because the deceased loved flowers. Nearly everyone complied, even the men wore floral shirts. It was very uplifting.

Usually I wear a smart black dress and blazer or formal coat, depending on the season. As pp said, nothing too attention grabbing. Not everyone wears black these days though; I’ve seen plenty in dark colours. As long as it’s respectful nobody will bat an eyelid.

I usually wear a black shift dress and black jacket, but anything plain, dark and smartish is fine. Just avoid colours/patterns.

IME no one really wears black any more. Just wear something smart, not too bright, and not too revealing.

As others have said, dark, smart unless specified otherwise. I have sadly been to a couple of children/ young people’s funerals and in those occasions there were specific colours requested which everyone complied with. I think I would wear a slightly less formal outfit if it was a young person.

Anything plain black, navy or dark grey.

You can obviously wear a white shirt/blouse.

I wore a navy dress with a grey blazer to my brother’s funeral. I also wore a necklace he bought me.

I wore a smart black jumpsuit and a black blazer to my mother’s funeral. I had to wear soft sketchers type trainers because I had a broken toe.

I wore a black rib knit midi dress and a black blazer to my mother’s funeral.

I spoke a eulogy at all 3. With my parents I was much more in a situation where their passing was less of a shock because they were old. With my brother, he’d had cancer but it didn’t feel real that he should pass away so young. Somehow this meant I just wore smart and plain colours.

I’d wear black, but 95% of my clothes are black so it wouldn’t be hard.

I think the days of all people wearing head to toe black are long gone. Just be relatively smart.

Where I live it's OK for non family to wear black. Or navy or dark grey.

I'd wear something dark, smart and in good condition. Like you would if you were going for a job interview but in darker colours unless expressly asked not to wear black.