What does one wear to a funeral these days?

[rivertine]

I'm mid-twenties.

Have a funeral coming up, I have no way of contacting the family of anybody else going, to ask what the dress code is.

Do I wear black? Trousers? A skirt?

Please help!

I generally wear navy or grey, plain ish dress and smart cardigan or coat depending on season unless something else is specified. Last few, funerals have asked for specific colours, so again worn smart clothes but in brighter colours.

I haven't worn black to a single funeral.
However having said that, if you want to wear black wear black.
As long as you aren't flashing loads of boob or wearing something that someone would wear to a nightclub you are fine.
Smart, sombre "office type" attire is a good rule of thumb.

Smart, clean, conservative, muted colours. Unless told otherwise.

I wear black smart office type clothes, with black shoes. My husband would wear a suit and tie.

I'm in England and if I wasn't sure I would still wear smart and dark, probably black, clothes. I think people usually specify when they expect bright or colourful. In my experience I have found more recently that close friends and family are more likely to choose to wear brighter colours, while less close acquaintances tend to opt with 'safer' more traditional darker options.

Black, navy, dark grey plain clothing all suitable for funerals in my experience. White shirt/ top can be worn under a dark suit. Formal day wear or professional office wear would be usual so no denim, shorts, sports wear, logos or anything revealing .
Sometimes people wear anything (usually too casual ) in black which I find odd . Definitely should be more formal for a church funeral. I’m sure this may vary in different circles though so it’s a tricky one!

I've been to a few in the last few years, none immediate family and none which specified anything about what people should wear on the funeral details. All England or Wales, protestant services. I'd say it varied a lot. Lots of black (I'm surprised how many saying not black) and majority of men in suits, but also lots of dark other colours, or even people in the kind of clothes you might wear to a smart casual office which weren't particularly dark coloured, but just weren't garish. None were hyper formal but all fairly smart. But most were for people where I would say they and their families weren't particularly into clothes, and wouldn't care what people were wearing either way, if you see what I mean. And all older people.

I have a black just below knee length wrap type dress so I've worn that to the last few, one of which I felt overdressed at as many people were in more smart casual skirts/ trousers and tops combo, in a range of dark colours, but the others it seemed just right for, so hard to predict really. My DH wears a suit and black tie as he doesn't have many other formal clothes, so I go fairly dark and formal to match him I suppose.

Before I had that dress I used to wear black trousers, decent black coat and whatever work / smart type top I had in a fairly dark or sober colour. That always seemed fine and perhaps avoided the risk of overdressing more than my current choice.

I wouldn't go bright unless specified, but stick to fairly dark to be on the safe side.

The funerals I have been to most people, of all ages, have worn black, smart vut not overly "dressy" clothes though I agree other dark colours would be absolutely fine. So black trousers or dress would be fine, but I probably wouldn't go full dress and heels, for example.
Went to few during covid and most people had black masks as well which I assume they ordered specially which I was a bit surprised by.
I wouldn't stress about it too much though, for most people it's making the effort to attend that counts.

Close family members funeral - we all chose to wear black and as smart as possibly to show respect - DSis, Mum and me in skirts/dresses - DGC including my two DD black trousers and tops and DS in a dark suit.

I don't think we cared what others wore - but they were all dark and smartly dressed even ones just popping in to the afternoon tea/food event afterwards - we were just please people took the time.

So trouser/skirt or dress any should be fine - smart and dark is probably safest choice unless otehr wise specified. IL went to one were they asked the congregation to wear walking gear - it was all themed round that.

Generally anything dark unless the family specify bright colours. I usually just wear black trousers or dark coloured dress. I've been to quite a few over the last couple of years and pretty much anything goes smart or casual so long as darkish. A lot nip from work or wherever to attend a service, so don't overthink it.

I'd say the need for all black is a bit outdated. But dark colours definitely. Nothing to showy, scanty or patterned. Not too much jewellery or bling.
But just something quite dark and plain but smart. A dress, top and trousers, skirt and shirt. Whatever you're comfortable in. Unless there's a specific dress code/theme of course.

I tend to wear navy for funerals these days as it is dark enough to be OK at the most formal and not black enough to be OK at more informal ones. I usually have a coloured scarf in my bag in case I turn up and find that its a "bright colours" dress code. DH always has a spare coloured tie for the same reason.

Grey works equally well

I always wear something dark and smart (usual office type wear), but I’ve noticed at many funerals over the past few years that lots of mourners are dressed very casually. I don’t know if anyone else has noticed this.

The last one I went to I wore grey narrow jeans, white T-shirt and a navy linen jacket. Black loafers.

Black unless told otherwise. Dress or groups fine, anything smart. Also a white shirt or top with black jacket over is fine.
I went to one recently and wore a black wrap dress and shoes, didn't need a jacket as it was quite warm.
Winter funerals in the last I have worn black trousers and boots with a black coat.

I’m surprised at the number of people saying not black.

At the funerals I’ve been to recently it’s been almost entirely black formal wear (black suits with a black tie for men and black dresses/trouser suits for women) plus black overcoats

Trousers not groups!

I went to one last week and most people wore black

I suspect it depends on where you live. It would be very unusual to wear black where I live. At FIL's funeral, the only person to wear black was one of the DILs. Everybody else work colours that weren't terribly muted but weren't garish. The men in the family just wore a suit or jacket and trousers. Non-family dressed in all black would be seen as a bit attention seeking.

I turned up at my SIL's in black as did all the rest of our side of the family as we hadn't got the message about turning up in her football team's colours...

Since then I've been a bit more trying to find out before I go.

Dark and smart

Anything dark and unfussy. It might seem obvious saying wear something that covers you but after seeing my cousin's gf around your age teeter at a graveside in short black shorts, bare legs and very high heeled ankle boots, I'd advise it. She was party of the funeral party so why nobody told her it was respectful to dress more modestly, I'll never know.

Black dress jacket, or black trousers and jacket. Tights too and black shoes and bag.

A family memeber turned up recently in faux leather trousers and black open toed criss cross lace shoes...she looked like she was going clubbing!

Im old school, respect comes first. My opinion on it.

As long as you don't do what one of my aunts did at my great-granny's and wear one of those wolf fleeces. I suppose in her defence it was black...

The last funeral I went was of an older person, so more traditional, although lots of youngsters in attendance. Almost everyone wore black, most ( but not all) women were in dresses. Any dark, sober colour would be OK though.
I have been to funerals where people were in ordinary clothes, jeans, hoodies, and really it's all fine, it's the turning up that counts, I think, for the bereaved family.
If you don't want to stand out, then a dark outfit that isn't too revealing is fine.