Conditions in a will

[Hakunatomato]

DH and I looking to get our wills done. Total estate including house and investments just under a million.

We want to leave around £10k to a niece and nephew, and BIL, who will be appointed executor we will leave £50k in recognition of having to sort out house sale etc. The rest of the estate we want to leave between a local hospice, and the dogs trust.

I have heard of people who have left very large bequests to charity, and once the charity is notified of this, they get quite brutal and put pressure on the executors to force through house sale and finalise things as quickly as possible so they can get their money, which is understandable as charities are cash strapped.

We would like to give BIL time to properly clear the house, distribute small things to people (with very low/value, apart from sentimental) and put the house on the market.

Is there any way we can instruct this to be done with no pressure from the charities and in his own time, say 6 months to a year? Has anybody written this into their will?

@FrenchFancie
I wish they were all like you. We went through hell with about 4 of the 9 named in the Will we were executing, I won't name names but I wish those charities would realize how it turned us off forever as a family towards those charities

Well, someone had to go there
Why make an ignorant and goady comment about a decision that is nobody else's business and nothing to do with the OPs request?
We do not know if know provsion has not been put in place for family before death, not that anyone is obliged to do anything financially for anyone, friend, family or foe.

Those that stand at family will readings waiting for their share, readu to stamp their feet and acvuse others of not caring because.... no finacial offering
Wow

Oh, some people are just sooo perfect aren't they?

@FinalInstructionstotheAudience yes it's up to op what the do with their money. But they should employ a solicitor as executor not throw bil breadcrumbs and think it's ok for him to sort it out.

Ex solicitor. Mainly family but some probate.

I’ll never leave money to charity in my will while I have living relatives. Most were fine as they were approaching a professional rather than a lay person but I did have to give short shrift to a couple of them. I ended up with one client as they were stressed about the pressure being exerted on them.

After my dad died in lieu of flowers we asked for donations to his favourite charity.

50k is not breadcrumbs
And the executors of a will are not always beneficiaries. Indeed, up until a decade or so ago, they could not be beneficiaries, they were chosen just to ensure probate and act upon the wishes of the deceased

Here is a conclusion
Please feel free to jump to it

@FinalInstructionstotheAudience there's a good chance bil will tell op where to stick it anyway. He doesn't have to be executor and they don't have to give him any money.

A solicitor would perhaps be a better idea anyway as they would have no interest in the money

My dad was executor to a will where the house was split between three charities last year. No family left.

He found it strange that when offers came in, they didn't ask/consult him, the OK went to the charities? Even though he is executor? They denied an offer £3k under, which is only £1k each for their national charities, for a house that needed completely gutting.

20 years ago, I was both so that's incorrect. Ditto my DH longer ago than that

Seems a reasonable conclusion to me.

I’m curious about why you’d argue with the PP’s point of view. What’s your beef with a perfectly sensible caution about relying on family to deal with charity beneficiaries?

The trustees of a charity which is a beneficiary of a will are under a fiduciary duty to pursue the legacy, and in this case it would be a generous one. I would get legal advice but be aware also that if you appoint a solicitor as executor of your estate, their fees will be astronomical. I think from memory they take a percentage of the estate (but don’t quote me as it’s years since I took advice on this myself.)

My advice would be to keep your Will simple, get your affairs in order and appoint a trusted friend or family member as executor.

The greed of some of these charities sounds incredible.

I do not have a beef. I am replying to the pp who said £50k was too little to be an executor and to those who assume that the OP hates her BIL and his children because the OP is leaving most of their assets to charity rather then them.

Ok, so I wasn't exact about when executors can be beneficiaries - so sue me
Jesus, no need for such snappiness

Why is this any of your business to challenge?

It would be better to appoint solicitors to deal with probate and act as at least co-executors with your brother. You really need also to look at increasing the amounts of those personal legacies - given the size of your estate, they really are a bit of a slap in the face.

I’m always amused by some of the reactions will threads attract.

Of course a person can leave money to whoever they want. But it’s obviously a bit weird not to leave the bulk of an estate to family or friends. A will is more than testamentary disposal. It signifies who and what matters to the deceased.

If a person has no relatives or hates them all, crack on. But otherwise, leaving most of a life’s assets to a charity, particularly an animal charity, is giving two fingers to everyone close.

I sometimes wonder whether people genuinely think they’ll be more highly regarded after death if they leave lots of money to a dogs’ home. A sort of financial martyrdom. If they do think that, they’re badly mistaken.

You are assuming that family are "close". That is often not the case. I can't remember the last time we saw our nephews and nieces, we don't even get birthday/christmas cards from them.

If the family is close, emotionally and geographically, then, yes, a small legacy is a bit of a slap in the face, but when you would barely recognise them if you passed them in the street, it's a different case entirely.

I'm reading this with horror!

I also intend to leave everything to charity. I don't want my relatives to have it because for most of my life they haven't given a shit about me.

I don't want my partners family to have it because they are absolutely loaded having already had two large inheritances. When we were poverty stricken and afraid we were about to lose our home they refused to help us despite their huge wealth. We only asked for a small loan to make sure we didn't lose our home but it was a hard no, they said we could stay with them if we were repossessed.

I will do my best to spend the lot on expensive holidays. Hopefully not for many years yet!

As the op hasn't been back I guess they didn't want to hear the truth but this thread has been a real eye-opener. I had heard charities can behave disgustingly to screw out every last penny from the estate, I suppose that's their 'right' if the will is written badly.
Why aren't solicitors advising better?

Why not leave 100k to each niece/nephew and 300k to BIL. That still leaves a coo £10k for dog food at the dog's home [and £490k for the charity CEO's own inheritance fund for his/her family].

So.... they did offer to help by housing you until you got back on your feet.

Many people advice not loaning family/friends money as it creates issues amongst them when it isn't/can't be paid off. And it was your partner's family, whom I presume from the term 'partner' that you're not even legally tied to so perhaps they didn't want to muddy the waters with a loan there for that reason as well.

If they don't need it, that's great. But they did offer to help, just not the way you wanted.

IF you do choose to leave it all to charity, brilliant, pick a good one. But make them responsible for dealing with the estate as well. Don't dump it on a poor friend or relative.

As someone who is going through the stress of a loved one’s will I would ask you to reconsider what you are doing to your own memory. My husband lifetimes memory of his father (who he had an excellent relationship with) has been tainted by his will. Give to charity while you are alive and to your family on your death.