Conditions in a will

[Hakunatomato]

DH and I looking to get our wills done. Total estate including house and investments just under a million.

We want to leave around £10k to a niece and nephew, and BIL, who will be appointed executor we will leave £50k in recognition of having to sort out house sale etc. The rest of the estate we want to leave between a local hospice, and the dogs trust.

I have heard of people who have left very large bequests to charity, and once the charity is notified of this, they get quite brutal and put pressure on the executors to force through house sale and finalise things as quickly as possible so they can get their money, which is understandable as charities are cash strapped.

We would like to give BIL time to properly clear the house, distribute small things to people (with very low/value, apart from sentimental) and put the house on the market.

Is there any way we can instruct this to be done with no pressure from the charities and in his own time, say 6 months to a year? Has anybody written this into their will?

The money could be going to a sister on the ops side or a cousin or a best friend the Bil doesn’t know- being the executor is about fulfilling the will, rubbish to say it’s too much to ask just because it’s a charity. It’s either too much to ask or it’s not, and the charity part shouldn’t make such a difference. The charity might do a lot more good with it than the sister or cousin or friend or whoever else who isn’t bil and his own dc. Many people are executors for wills that don’t allocate much to them or their children.

A friend of ours was proposing to leave the marital home (where he and his wife had lived for 20 years) plus a smaller house - both paid off - to an animal charity. He was proposing that his wife should be allowed to stay in either house for as long as she wanted to.

I was appalled by this - his wife was from another EU country so it gave her no option to sell and buy something back home eventually. But he was a profoundly selfish and self-centred man, who’d do what he wanted regardless.

The solicitor advised leaving the houses, not the proceeds of the sales, to the charity. Otherwise, he said, there would be endless hassle, why hadn’t they sold yet, why hadn’t they sold for more money, etc.

In the end, not long before he died he made over the smaller house to his wife absolutely (IMo afraid of adverse comments after he was gone) and she was allowed in the terms of his will to stay in their home for a max of 3 years.

A year or so after he’d died, the charity (who’d been informed in full of the terms of the will) had the nerve to write to the widow, basically saying, ‘Actually it’d be much easier for us if you could just sell the house yourself and give us the money - thanks.’

She was terribly upset.

I’m pleased to say that dh (an executor) wrote back and told them in only slightly more polite terms, to fuck off.
All they had to do was pass the keys to a local estate agent - they had their own in house legal dept. to deal with that side.

Needless to say, I was disgusted with them. The house eventually sold for around £350k and they still chose to hassle the widow.

Charities, especially animal ones, get so much money through donations, legacies and corporate sponsorship. I would leave the majority to my nieces and nephews to set them up for life. Then a small charity donation for eg £25k expressed in a letter of wishes so the charity can't force a quick sale.

Almost a million pounds can go towards, school fees, university fees and first step in the property ladder. I'd rethink your donation split and distribute more to the next generation rather than a charity.

My husband left legacies to several charities and not one put any pressure on me. It was a complicated estate due to tax reasons and it was over two years before they got any money. They did not hassle me at all.

I was wondering that, too. Usually, the first time random beneficiaries know of a bequest is when a cheque lands through the letter box, or they are asked for their bank details so it can be paid into their account direct.

@Hakunatomato If that happens simply reply that the money will be disbursed when the legal work is completed. I seem to recall from dealing wwith DF estate that there has to be a period of 6 months to allow for any claims

They check wills once probate is applied for. There are companies whose whole purpose is legacy hunting

You'd be best instructing a solicitor to deal
with the estate, they can sell the house and then distribute as wished. Agree with other PPs that a % is more sensible than a £ amount

It isn't, it really isn't. Giving a % is the worst thing you can do. The charity/charities will do everything in their power to maximise their percentage. Believe me, I have bitter experience of this.
Giving for instance £5,000 or any fixed sum is so much better. They won't want to know the value of every small thing down to an earring or a bracelet if they just get a fixed amount.

@NDmumoftwo literally everyone is advising NOT to give a %!

You have the chance to change your niece and nephew’s lives and you’re choosing to give them a bit of pocket money?

It is typically better to give a % then the intention is retained ie to give 10% of your assets

Giving a fixed sun means that family may end up with nothing/almost nothing- as in the 2 examples I gave above

I would get a solicitor to be executor. I wouldn’t leave it to charity I would give whilst alive and make sure where it actually goes!

This is good to know and I’m going to change my will.

Don't forget their expensive lawyers so they can harass the executors.

You could leave the estate to the niece/nephew and give to the charity while you are alive.

You also need to be up front and make sure that the executor knows the terms of the will and agrees

My DH was executor for his sister and she had alway said it was going to her nieces/nephews (4 people). Some specific family pieces were meant to be left to me.

When she died suddenly it had been left to her cousins children (not a problem for me as they lived near her) and the named items were never found.

My DF was executor and would have been pretty pissed off but it ended up being a tiny estate but it cost him a lot of money and time to be the executor (she died abroad where she lived) and he only agreed as his children were meant to be the beneficiaries

The cousins actually shared it across the nieces and nephews and their cousins and we all got about £2000 (10 ish of us) . When she made the will it was probably 10-20 times that amount.

I have worked in fundraising for charities for ten years. I will give while I'm alive but won't be leaving a penny in my will.

Unless you are leaving tens of millions your loved ones will have no idea how this is spent, the charity will take as much as they can and that's it.

Give larger amounts now you can decide where the money goes, actually visit the charity etc.

Leaving it to your love ones will massively impact thier lives much more than a charity..

I have to agree, estate worth a million and so little left to a niece and nephew. I would have to dislike them to do that. Being an executor is a pain the ass too.

The executor is often these are person asked to hold the power of attorney as well. Another job that takes many many hours.

The main concern is you've stated amounts not percentages. If things go wrong then your niece etc will get their money but if the bulk is to be left to any dc they won't get it as the amounts are paid out first.

What if she puts herself in a nursing home?

Once the will is lodged, its public property. Anyone can have a look at any will.
The bigger charities likely look at every will to see if they are mentioned. The smaller charities wont.

I've heard too much about the sheer nastiness from charities to executors when the charity is due something from a will. I won't leave any money to any charity because of this. I also wont increase my donations now, in fact I actively search out the smaller, more local charities.
If I can donate clothing to a tiny local charity shop that's only for my area, I'd rather do that than donate clothing to one of the larger more well know charities.

For OP you can write pretty much anything in your will, if it can be done at the time, great, if not,then they'll have to disregard it.

I saw a fascinating documentary years ago about charitable giving and the job of charity consultants. These are people who advise philanthropists on how to do the best with donations.

One measure talked about was an index of how long it takes for a notional £1 donation to reach the frontline, rather than being added to a cash pile. Some charities apparently (at least at the time) have huge cash reserves so that donations and legacies just sit in the bank for years not doing anything.

IIRC the animal charities are much the worst. Which would make sense since a proper charity can always expand to help more ill, disabled, impoverished etc people, but a dog or donkey or hedgehog charity can only look after so many animals.

I'll be honest, I don't understand people leaving the bulk of their estates to charity. It just seems gullible to me. I doubt that much of it goes on truly charitable aims as opposed to salaries and expenses. Knew someone who was a football fan and left money to her local EFL team (not a charity of course), I could not get my head around how she hadn't realised she was given her money to a random business owner!