Thread 14 - TalkLair: “What The Hell Are We Supposed To Use, Man? Harsh Language?”

[Kucinghitam]

(Previous thread 13).

Summer should be well under way, but the chilly wind, grey clouds and pouring rain beg to differ. Looks like 2024 continues to be a washout - on the bright side, the Tories got washed out too! In the TalkLair, we remain hunkered down keeping cosy and warm. The hearth is glowing, the walls covered in dubious artwork, books by non-approved authors line the shelves, rugs are down on the floors (and assorted pets curled up on them).

We just won’t mention the gnawed bones of our prey over there in the corner of the cave…

That is very touching.

That’s great.

Beautiful sculpture.

What an amazing story, I wonder how many people know anything about it? What a magnificent gesture from on impoverished, suffering people to another.

What a lovely story, I had no idea about what happened. It's incredibly touching.

The story of the Choctaw donation during the Great Hunger is very well known in Ireland, hence the speed to donate when we heard about their own difficulties sourcing support at the start of Covid, 180ish years later.

I still haven't seen the kindred spirits sculpture - must make a trip next summer.

I became aware of the Choctaw donation through my undergraduate dissertation which was about the Great Hunger. There were also donations from former slaves in some West Indies islands and from some slave churches in the US. The Quakers were also a great bunch of lads.

Also, big up to Sultan Abdulmecid of the ottoman empire. He gave £1k and sent ships with food and medicine to Drogheda. There's some "he is said to have" about the ships but there's a plaque so I choose to accept he did. The story is he wanted to donate £10k but was told that as Queen Victoria had given £2k it would break protocol to give more than her, hence 1k plus ships.

Quakers are usually a great bunch of lads. I am a very bad Quaker - member of my local Friends meeting, but sadly they are all "be kind" to the non-binary members of our meeting and I think the expression of GC views would be unacceptable so I haven't been to meeting for a couple of years now.

I'd be avoiding the meetings too, @Britinme .

I've been considering going along to a Quaker meeting for years but I've never quite managed it. I think I'm afraid the silence will drive me mad.

I have a good friend who, as he puts it, "tries to be a Quaker". He mainly goes for the companionable silence and their tolerance of his total rejection of the idea of a deity. I went to a Quaker school in Northern Ireland for my A-level years. It was chiefly notable for having only two Quakers on the premises - the headmaster and a lovely. quiet, almost certainly gay boy in my class. The RE teacher was a rampant Protestant of the very worst NI variety, whose idea of teaching comparative religion to sixth-formers was to mock the crazy beliefs of other religions while never seeing the joke of his own. The only nod to Quakerism was the absence of hymns and prayers in morning assembly, but instead a few minutes' silence. I liked that: it sort of set me up for the day.

I spent 9 years in a school that was entirely secular, but run by Quakers and largely according to Quaker principles. Lots of pupil councils and decisions by consensus.

I liked it but I'm not sure it did a terribly good job of preparing me for the 'normal' world. Certainly my next school, a standard state comprehensive leaning to the stricter side, didn't know what to make of me and most teachers never quite adapted. (Some did try suggesting that I ought to be adapting to them, but that was plainly ridiculous.) It did give me the ability to sit comfortably in silence¹, though.

¹ The external variety - there are always a few conversations, and a tune or 2, running in my head.

The town I grew up in was heavily influenced by Quakers who were very involved in philanthropy and humanitarianism. They campaigned against slavery and animal abuse and gifted the town its town clock. So I was always aware of them growing up and was tempted to join meetings, but never managed it. I don’t think I’d make a very good Quaker, people annoy me too much which seems to go against the spirit of it all.

I went to a C of E school and I still get the bloody songs we had to sing stuck in my head to this day. We had one teacher who had a fish on the back of his Peugeot 205 and used to shout at anyone who used the Lord’s name in vain. I remember him chuckling to himself and shaking his head at the idea of evolution, ‘As if!’. I once came home from school and suggested to my parents that we pray before dinner. They looked at me like I had two heads but for a time I really thought God was going to smite me.

I once got the ruler (on my hand) for saying "Gosh!" Because it was just a way of saying "God!"

Presumably Goodness, Golly, Oh my and By jove were also out then. How were you supposed to express surprise or shock?

On the rare occasions I go to meeting, the silence is what I really like. Also they are cool with me being an atheist.

When I was in primary and secondary school (1955 to 1968) we still had an act of corporate worship every morning, complete with hymn(s), Bible reading and a homily from the head teacher (secondary school head teacher was a Methodist lay preacher I think). I didn't mind it - gave me an excellent knowledge of the English hymnal and the Bible, which came in handy when studying English Lit, and it turned most of us into atheists anyway.

I worked in the boarding hostel for a generally 'Protestant' school (mostly C of I) when I was in college - free accommodation and food in exchange for supervision duties - and one of the senior staff who had been at a Quaker school used to have a few moments silence before meals as a change from the usual grace. Such a relief - you would not believe the amount of noise 100 teenagers can generate in a dining room, even well supervised.

A period of silence during school assembly would have been most welcome. Instead what we got, in the head of school's own words, was 'a hymn, a prayer and a bollocking'.

@VictorianBigot I once came home from school and suggested to my parents that we pray before dinner.

Ha! I came home from primary school at the end of my first term and told my parents that Marjorie Clark had come to school in a black dress and told us a story about a donkey. It wasn't until they met the army chaplain, Padre Clark, that the penny dropped.

We sang hymns at Sunday school, but at regular school it was more like Bible Pop accompanied by piano, plus a story from the bible. I hated every second of it and always struggled to sit still.

I'm just back from a week away with my daughter, we saw quite a lot of wildlife. We went to a nature reserve, Wood Walton Fen, didn't see much in the way of birds, but did see a common newt under a log, the photo didn't come out well.

At least 9 different types of dragon and damselflies.

And I got bitten by a horsefly, which got badly infected, but fortunately, the antibiotics are clearing it.

There was an ant's nest in a tree, black nightshade, woody nightshade, a cricket and a Speckled Wood butterfly.

And a pair of swans with 7 cygnets!

I've just identified the snail as an amber snail, apparently widespread in England and Wales, less so in Scotland - first one I've ever seen!

Wood Walton Fen sounds lovely.

Sorry to hear your horsefly bite! I nearly ended up in hospital after one of those and loathe the things.

I recommend this stuff which, quite honestly, has been life changing for me as every biting insect on the planet loves me. Smidge keeps everything away, even ants, and it's bloody brilliant.

www.smidgeup.com