How do you think you'll measure your success at the end of life

[Slowbuild]

Just that really.

I possibly have chosen the wrong words to use in my title but hopefully PPs will understand what I mean.

Will you measure success by career choice, money made, places travelled, family created, marriage or certainly never marrying.

For me I feel I'm at a bit of a crossroads. I have some decisions to make and I'm fed up of feeling a bit of a failure. I want to figure out what is important to me now but also what will be in years to come. What will last the test of time so to speak.

Whether my kids are happy and functioning.

I'll measure it on my children's happiness!

If I have peace

Contentment with our lot and with that of our children and grandchildren.

By the strength of the connections I've made with other people, how I feel about those around me and how they feel about me. I'll measure it in love, I guess.

Enjoy my own life and hopefully improve those of others - husband, family, friends, clients etc.

That’s it.

Everything above. Fond memories and experiences and people I love. That’s it.

My contentment or regrets.
The relationships with my family.

How many people did I help significantly, how many people did I make a passing positive difference to, and are my kids happy and productive members of society.

The happiness of my children and grandchildren and the time spent with those that I love.

Are my kids happy, have I seen the world and all the places I wanted to go, am I loved and have I loved

Have I made a positive contribution to the world in some small way

I'm not sure I'll be bothered about "success". I guess I'll just be happy if I die when I'm still relatively active and mentally competent. That would be sufficient.
Then I'll be (rightly) forgotten, so any "success" will be irrelevant.

Not well, worked too much, I did the best I could but really I would have done pretty much everything differently, I'm reasonably well off for retirement, but not happy about my life choices in the past. Nothing to do about it now though.

If my children are happy and still close to me. If I have grandchildren and wider family that they all love and respect me.

Success to me is to love and be loved.

If I’ve grown as a person, learnt from my mistakes, did what I could to be a positive influence for those around me including my family. Taught my children resilience in hard times (cos we all have them). I’ll be happy!

In terms of positive impact, I think, whether that's through work, children, wider family or friends - hopefully, a combination of all of those. There's also an element of, "will I feel satisfied I have fulfilled my potential as far as I was comfortable with (i.e. not sacrificing any one or more element of my life to achieve further in another)?"

If me and DH and DS are all happy then it all went ok I guess.

My relationship with my children, partner and friends.

My children being nice people and doing well / happy

Being at peace with everything I’ve done and the way I’ve handled everything, I suppose. Everything else is out of my control really.

How happy is my child? Do they have a fully functioning moral compass that guides their action? Do they love? Are they loved? Will they continue contributing to the well being of the world and our community when I'm not around?

In short, have I somehow managed to bring up a balanced and happy person?

That's the only thing I think nature wanted of me.

If I can answer yes to most of those questions, then I can die in peace.

My favourite guru steven covey says it’s all about “ live, love, learn, and leave a legacy” that will do for me!

My Dad is currently in hospice.

From what I can tell the most important things to him are my mum, me and my son. The circle of love that surrounds him and always will. This is far and away the most important thing. Your family.

Memories of a long and happy life with lots of travel (55 countries) and friends.

Having run a successful business which he leaves to us.

Leaving us well provided for. I own 2 houses outright and DS school fees are all paid until he’s 16. My mum also owns 2 houses outright and will be financially comfortable.

I guess the last two are that he leaves a legacy.