What’s your strangest ‘wedding food’ related story

[CosyMosy]

Sorry, rubbish title! I was chatting today with a colleague about a wedding I went to last year. The wedding was at the church at 12pm and we were invited to a country club for the reception. We turned up at 1 to find the buffet laid out but not open. We were told it wasn’t opening till 4!! Everyone was starving and the only thing behind the bar was out of date crisps (that the bar was selling for 10pm cheaper because of 😅). When the buffet eventually opened at 4, the bride announced over the mic that we needed to make sure we only took 1 small plate each because it had to last for the night guests as well 😵‍💫. The takeaway down the road made a roaring trade that night

My colleague told me she once went to the wedding of her DH’s colleague, when they sat down for the wedding breakfast half the table were given menus with prices on. When they queried this, it turns out the bride and groom had made the decision to only pay for HALF of the guests meals and the other half were to order and pay for their own meal at the bar!

Something about weddings brings out the worst in people!

it turns out the bride and groom had made the decision to only pay for HALF of the guests meals and the other half were to order and pay for their own meal at the bar!

I mean, the first one was bad enough, but this takes the biscuit

Not really the same thing but a good and wedding related story-

We had the most amazing spread for our wedding meal- like a posh buffet so people could help themselves but it was absolutely fab stuff with fresh seafood and looked amazing. I was so looking forward to it. But my dress had started falling down at the corset bit as my damned boobs were too big for the dress so my friends (bridesmaid types but no bridesmaids) had re-tied me into the corset bit to keep me decent. This meant I could barely sit down and breathe and definitely could eat! I was so sad!!! After the speeches I did manage to get my dress loosened off a bit and we adjusted its style to keep it up as I had been threatening to change into jeans!!

I ate soup and bread that night… gutted I was. The buffet was polished off by the time I had changed.

Mine was years ago, before anyone had the internet, so before Google Maps and definitely before deliveroo.

We were invited to a wedding in a remote venue. Wedding at 12.

We didn't eat until 6pm then it was 'nouveau cuisine' and you needed a magnifying glass to find anything on the plate.

I'm not sure many people stayed into the evening (we didn't) as people were just collapsing with hunger. With the ceremony being at 12, most people had presumed they would be eating by 2pm so hadn't brought a picnic to keep them going.

A waitress at quite a fancy wedding refused to put any vegetables onto my plate because my vegetarian option, quite a small vegetable tart, already contained vegetables. Luckily a no-nonsense aunt was sitting nearby and was having none of it.

A dear friend, since passed, ordered a buffet for her wedding. Some of us had travelled hundreds of miles to attend. Unfortunately, the catering company didn't cater properly and by the time it was our turn all that was left were a few sprigs of lettuce. Bride was absolutely mortified.

The same happened with the dessert. Wedding guests went out to buy cakes so everyone could have some.

My then partner and I also attended a "posh do" where there were simply hours between the service and the actual meal. I say "meal", it would barely feed a child. My partner had a large appetite so I ended up giving him half of mine.

My partner is vegan. At one wedding his main was a bowl of beetroot. Nothing else. Just beetroot.
At another wedding he got nothing because someone else (not vegan) took the only vegan meal.
At another wedding we had a bread roll and a slice of cucumber as we were the last table called to the buffet and that's all that was left.
Oh and at one wedding the starter was melon soup. It was fine but a bit weird.

Not directly food related but I went to a wedding once where there weren’t enough tables for everyone to sit at, some people ended up perched on random chairs in a corridor trying to eat their meal.

Last wedding I went to the main food options ran out on the buffet and the kitchen didn’t start cooking any more until it was gone so everything else went cold while they cooked a handful more frozen chicken strips and even then not everyone got fed, I ordered a pizza when I got home!

I'm not sure how typical they were of weddings at the time, but I went to three in the early 1980s in which the food arrangements would be considered very strange these days. After a couple of hours of standing around drinking champagne and eating canapés, we had speeches and the cake was cut and handed out. There was no other food.

At the other extreme, I remember going to another wedding, also in the early 1980s, at which the food was extremely rich and plentiful. My siblings and I (I was about 20 and they were teenagers) had never seen so much food. We were in heaven and absolutely stuffed ourselves from the buffet, especially with puddings. After what a very short time, a second buffet came out. We overate disgracefully and were all sick on the way home!

My sister's wedding. She asked my opinion on food choices and I said the seafood platter for starters sounded epic.

The wedding comes, and the speeches are before food.

Beat man waffles on for 45 fucking minutes. Everyone is starving. My dad and the groom kept them fairly short and sweet.

Starter platters arrived. Everyone hungry. No one else on my table liked seafood.

I hoovered it up. Result!

I went to a wedding at quite a famous church, after the service at 11.30am, the wedding party went off for their meal, leaving the guests all standing around outside wondering what was happening. We were told to meet back at a pub for a buffet at 6pm.
The majority of us pottered off to McDonald's in our wedding finery.

I've been to plenty that have grossly under catered. I don't want small posh food that leaves me hungry, I want carbs and lots of them.

Few years ago I attended a friend’s wedding who had an afternoon tea instead of a wedding breakfast. We were asked to notify of any allergies on the rsvp so I wrote that I was coeliac. When it was served there was literally nothing I could eat. I asked if they had any gluten free alternatives and they said no! I was starving because I’d skipped breakfast to help with the decorating of the venue. So I had to wait until the evening buffet.

By the time it came out I was STARVING. It was sandwiches, quiche, sausage rolls, cold pasta, pizza - again, zero gluten free. I nipped out into the hotel restaurant to see if I could get a bowl of chips. They’d stopped serving food (at 8pm on a Saturday night!) and it was in the middle of nowhere. Worst day ever!

I’m a vegetarian, I also have an allergy, so I always say I’m having to bring my own food and I can just pop on a plate if thats easier. No one has ever taken me up on it yet.

I was once served a slice of cauliflower and nothing else, the menu stated I would be having roast curried cauliflower on a savoury chick pea pancake with roasted carrots, humous and focaccia. My pudding was crushed ice with bits of cucumber.

At our wedding it was at a small venue, rather than people choose before hand we just had guests order from the actual menu on the day, some were very happy when they could order more than one starter, main or dessert, it also meant people could order whenever they wanted if they were hungry before the additional hot evening buffet was served.

We went to one a few years ago where the ceremony was at 12, then the ceremony room needed to be set up again for the reception - they were so understaffed that we missed the tiny canapés being served because we had to help the staff set up!

When we did eventually get food around 4pm, it was sharing portions between 4 people. Me and DH (who has an enormous appetite) were sitting opposite another couple we’d never met, and the guy was a similar size to DH with an equally huge appetite. The portions were tiny and it was food that was easily ‘shareable’. When the main arrived we worked out we could only take one (small) potato each, otherwise someone wouldn’t get one.

It was absolutely bizarre and I genuinely felt quite faint, even after the meal. Fortunately they brought out snacks and wedding cake later on which got absolutely ransacked!

I remember the wedding where the entire extended family menfolk greedily loaded up their plates, left most of it uneaten at their tables, while a whole bunch of guests were left with nothing by the time they got to the buffet. They were utterly oblivious to anyone else's requirement for food.

Buffets never work, ever, anywhere, unless they're bottomless and continuously replenished or heavily policed by catering staff (which they never are at a wedding).

"Edible Sand"

I just...can't even begin to explain...but the edible sand was the much talked about highlight of the wedding meal.

"We're having EDIBLE SAND, you know? It's SAND. That's EDIBLE." but in a very, "aren't we well to do and aren't all you guests ever so lucky?!" sort of way.

Does anyone willingly eat sand?!

And this gem, from the same wedding...

"I mean, no one actually likes or eats cake and it's a lot of money for a wedding
cake that will only go to waste as no one eats cake so we're having a giant 5 tier cheesecake instead."

"Oh...what flavour cheesecake?"

"Erm...cheese, obviously. It's not a cheesecake. It's a CHEESE Cake. So every tier will be a round of different sorts of aged cheese. It's going to be amazing!"

Look...I like CAKE cake, cheese is ok. But a 3 foot giant display of stinking sweaty cheeses did not go down well in a small venue in the baking August heat being left there for hours on end. The bride and groom were the only people tucking in and looking confused as to why people were saying, "erm, I'm alright thanks." to their gradually more pleading by the hour invitations to "have some CHEESE!!! We've got Stilton? Wensleydale? Gouda? BRIE? HAVE SOME BRIE C'MON????"

The cheese and sand wedding...

Not that strange but two recent weddings I have or am attending are keeping the food secret from guests? Is this a new trend?

Not bad strange but I went to a wedding recently where the bride and groom were both very fussy eaters and both tee total so they were eating chicken nuggets and chips with cola for dinner while all the guest had gorgeous three course meals and complimentary wine and beer.

It was quite sweet and very characteristic of the whole wedding which was mostly a very traditional, big wedding with a few odd but thoughtful little down to earth touches that made the whole thing one the most enjoyable weddings I’ve ever been to.

At my first wedding the Groom's uncle brought his own corn beef sandwiches wrapped in foil, pushed his meal aside and had those.

I've been to a wedding abroad where after the canapés a huge charcuterie board was brought out. The British guests, assuming this was the main meal, tucked in. Only then did we realise that we still had a 6 course sit down meal in near 40 degree heat to get through.

@PerkyMintDeer At my second wedding we had a cheese-cake in the evening (although we'd also had desserts after the wedding breakfast). It was enough cheese to serve 60-70 people apparently, with masses of accompaniments. Our 45 guests polished it off in under an hour Different strokes for different folks!

In my friendship group, a 5 tier cake of cheese would go down a treat! We often have cheese parties. But you gotta know your audience...

My first wedding - buffet at the local pub... Seemed to go down well.
Wedding 2 we hired out a Chinese buffet restaurant and paid for everyone.. All happy people.
Wedding 3 another buffet in a club.. Way too much food..
Last but not least we went home straight after the registry office service.. Chef ds had made sweet and sour chicken and chilli both with rice in advance with a selection of cakes including a fab wedding cake!! No complaints from anyone.
Not planning on doing it again.

But you never know. Ms Taylor managed a few more!!

🤣🤣

My cousin got married at 11 o clock which was a surprise to say the least... so we had to leave home just after 9am to get there. We were in such a rush that I forgot the bag of snacks that we'd packed for the kids. We then got stuck at the church until 2pm because of the horrific amount of photos that got taken, so by the time we reached the reception hotel we were absolutely starving! We got given a bucks fizz on arrival but the bride and groom then disappeared off again having yet more photos done... by this stage, we had three very hangry children and the bar had stopped serving food at 2pm. It was 5pm when we sat down for the reception and bugger me they then did the speeches. It was honestly such a boring and awful day that we've not accepted another day invite for a wedding since. There was absolutely no thought for the elderly relatives/ kids who went over 7 hours without any food of any kind.