Granddaughters left with £200,000 legal bill after arguing over £50 inheritance

[SerendipityJane]

Pretty certain there was an Ealing comedy about this ....

https://metro.co.uk/2024/05/21/granddaughters-angry-getting-50-will-now-face-200-000-legal-bill-20878694

"Much of MN seems to have this weird idea that money should just be passed from generation to generation and not actually used."

I, personally, find it odd that there are so many people on Mumsnet that have the attitude of spending it all and leaving nothing.

Most cultures tend to see family wealth as something to build and pass on to the next generation.

There's only so much that the average person can do in a lifetime. When you factor in the cost of hosting, childcare and university debt, most people struggle for their entire working lives.

Growing and conserving a big pot of family money would make a huge difference to their quality of life.

@ThisOldThang house prices are only sustainable now because some people get massive help from their parents or grandparents. If this wasn't the case, prices would have to go down as nobody could afford to buy a house.

As it is, there is a massive gap between those who, through the luck of their birth, get help and those who don't, and it will keep on widening.

House prices growth is due to supply and demand.

The population continues to increase exponentially and the people that vote for open borders refuse to allow mass housing development on the Green Belt.

They then complain about house prices.

🤷‍♀️

There's only so much that the average person can do in a lifetime. When you factor in the cost of hosting, childcare and university debt, most people struggle for their entire working lives

Growing and conserving a big pot of family money would make a huge difference to their quality of life

Your argument seems to be that you can't spend it in the limited time you have so rather than use it pass it on - to people who will do the same.

My argument is that rather than frittering away capital on holidays, cars, etc, it should be invested for the long term benefit of the family.

That investment could be in property to reduce housing costs or, once that's covered, in assets that generate an ongoing return.

It is a completely different mindset.

🙄

His money. Not theirs.

Entitled much!

Why do you think that people are owed an inheritance?

It was down to the grandfather to decide how his estate should be split. We cannot assume that if the dead son had survived he would have left his estate to his children or, if he did, that if would have been in equal shares.

Now that entails have been ended, nobody has any right to an inheritance.

Mumsnet is a strange place.

'Boomers had it so easy. They've made £zillions from property'

'Boomers should spend every penny and leave nothing to their kids. If the kids complain they're money grubbing scum.'

On Mumsnet. The consensus always seems to be that you have to leave your children your estate equally in all cases even if one is satan who live in a palace and one lives on the streets and is starving . All about equality apparently even if you don't like them equally
I'll never understand it!

even if you don't like them equally

😕

I'll never understand how anyone could be happy to play favourites with their kids.

Probably because you've never had a kid fleece you for ££££ or whatever.

I doubt that’s common at all.

It's very common, as is a sense of entitlement to their parents money once their parents get elderly. People are ruthless.

Tbh he sounds like a petty old blighter. I’d never try to control my family with money ie. you only inherit if you visit often enough/do as I say.

I think they were wrong to contest it though - I wouldn’t have wanted the nasty sod’s money - they should’ve had some pride.

See I just think this is awful. Even if I had a falling out with one of my dcs I’d never do that. A parent should love their kids unconditionally - my money is getting split equally between them, and nothing will change that. Doesn’t matter if some have dcs and some don’t or some visit every week and some once a year.
And re your mil it seems in the end her sons relationship was what suffered - she helped to ruin their relationship with her actions.

People should be able to leave their estate to who they choose. These people learned this the hard way. It doesn’t matter what their father would have wanted. It wasn’t his estate.

Accept, rage privately if you want, move on.

...In England.

I think it's interesting that the overwhelming majority of MNers always seem to believe that the Anglo-American-Australian way of doing this is unquestionably morally correct.

@theworldie "nasty sod" for not wanting to leave money to people who didn't like him that much? I think he was absolutely in the right, they didn't want to know him when he was alive so they don't get his money when he's dead. Seems pretty simple to me

You say that now, but might change your tune in 35 years time when one child doesn't make any effort to see you and/or ask for their inheritance early/tries to manipulate you into getting more etc etc.

You'd be surprised at the amount of kids who think they should get an "early inheritance" or extra help towards X, because they didn't get a high paying job, or they think they deserve more money than siblings because of spurious reasons, try and get their infirm parents to change wills to their favour

When large sums of money are potentially up for grabs, a real greedy and nasty side can come out of even the nicest people.

I know people who's parents have died, and within hours of the death, random cousins etc have turned up at the house to get stuff from the house.

Another one, a long estranged son/brother, who "absolutely couldn't visit" / "lived too far away " /etc miraculously appears and suddenly decided his mother who he hadn't spoken to or seen in 7+ years was definitely not in her right mind because of what illness he thought she had, and tried to contest the will because he thought her mentally incapable.

A colleague had people turn up at her house demanding to see her mother's will, because they said her mother had "agreed" to give them some money. She didn't know who the person was, they claimed to be a long time friend of her mother's

Tbh he sounds like a petty old blighter. I’d never try to control my family with money ie. you only inherit if you visit often enough/do as I say.

@theworldie

You make it sound like inheritance is some kind of entitlement. It's not, it's a gift.

Is there any evidence that he tried to 'control' his family? I don't think they even found out until after he died.