Would you have spent more or less on your wedding?

[NoImRenlea]

H2B and I are fortunate to be able to afford a nice wedding but i am wondering if we’d regret spending so much money. We already own a house and have children who are saving for too, and they already have good inheritances from other family members saved away.

one venue I have seen I absolutely love but it’s at the top of what I’d comfortably spend. But the cheaper options look a bit sad compared to the lush venue.

we are the last ones of our friends to get married so everyone would be really up for the party, and I want a big thing celebrating with everyone

we’d still have money in savings leftover after and none on credit cards etc

did anyone regret spending money on a wedding? Or wish you’d spent more?

I know two groups of people who wish less was spent. Those who paid for it themselves and spent more than they had and those that were pushed into it by their parents or inlaws paying and ended up having a wedding they didn't want. You have the money and want this wedding, so go for it. Both of your venues are beautiful. The more expensive one looks like it would probably work better in the rain with the statement window.

From a guest point of view, please just don't leave them hang around starving while you take hours of photos.

I still kinda regret not splashing out on the dress of my dreams and getting something in a bridal sale.
I think if you can afford it then go for it and make a memory.
Our wedding- 26 years ago- was fairly modest but no regrets about that as it was what we wanted except wish the buffet had been a bit more generous! Caterer was mean with portion sizes!

My wedding cost about £250 and I've never regretted not spending any more. I still think it was the best wedding I've been to, with the nicest food and by far the best music. No matter how much money we'd had at the time, I could never have spent a small fortune on a big wedding.

Neither. I had a small, low-budget wedding with 20 guests and I was happy with it.

We spent around £15k in 2022 and have no regrets. It was a great day!

We spent around £5000 20 years ago and it was a small church wedding. It was lovely. We didn't bother with cake, gifts, speeches etc. we just joined the banquet at a castle afterwards and sat with everyone else.

The only thing I regret was inviting my brother and his family as his wife was absolutely foul to me all day. I never saw them again after that. No loss, but I wish they hadn't been there.

We spent around 15k in 2021 - we both say we wish we'd saved the money and done something smaller!

We had fun, but in hindsight it was just 1 day, it seems ridiculous now that we spent years of savings on one day and most of the stuff we spent money on was really for the benefit of others!

We have two kids in childcare now and I really wish we still had a decent chunk of that money, it would have allowed us more things like holidays and days out which we aren't really able to do right now, paying two nursery bills.

I got carried away. I started off wanting something modest and then ended up high end with all the bells and whistles. And yes I regret it now.

I thought everyone would treat me like a princess, especially my husband to be. It didn't exactly turn out that way for all kinds of outing reasons.

I hope yours is wonderful OP but not because of the amount of money you spend on it! Also focus on what gives you joy (without being bridezilla about it) rather than worrying about everyone else.

I spent 5k 28 years ago, I do wish I’d had a free bar in the evening . Now when I have big parties for my ‘0’ birthdays I always have a free bar or a party at home where no one has to spend anything.
I didn’t have bridesmaids or a hen do, I wasn’t bothered about that, I had a nice dress, nice meal and then a party in the evening.

I prefer the second choice.
I really like round tables for events - they are far more sociable as each person can talk to more than the person either side of them. I think they look better & are easier to dress.

Both venues look fabulous, I’d feel very privileged to be invited to either of those places.

I kind of wish I had splurged a bit more on my dress.

if I were doing it now with children though, I don’t think I would spend as much as we did. We just have different priorities now.

Tables can be changed though, it’s like judging a house for sale by the sofa it has in the living room

We spent approximately £5K 7 years ago. We used contacts to get a lot of reduced/free stuff, I made all the jewellery/table decorations/bouquets. Everyone had a really good time. The only regret was not having a professional photographer, that is the only thing I’d change.

We eloped (whilst still getting dressed up and having a really special day) and spent about £350.
I can't even conceive of spending £10k or more on a party when I still have a mortgage, but I don't particularly "get" big weddings full stop - hence the elopement.

We didn’t spend much. We chose a venue with gorgeous views, so we have lovely photos. We had a meal at the venue with our very small family. Then went to our honeymoon destination- wouldn’t change a thing!

ours was probably around 18k all in all in 2015. The venue was the biggest chunk, it was absolutely beautiful and I basically refused to get married anywhere else, so we cut our cloth and literally everything else was DIY or a friend helped. Can you do that?

For example, I'm lucky that my mum is very creative and crafty. We bought the flowers wholesale from our florist friend, and DM did the bouquets and buttonholes, the seating plan, the table numbers, etc. The venue provided candlesticks on the tables, I bought some fake ivy from ebay. A friend baked our wedding cake, and friends did the photos for £200 and feeding them on the day! My dress was £325 in a sale, the band was my godfather and they did it for a reduced fee and my bridesmaids paid for their dresses themselves (i did offer!) Can you do that?

The thing I wish we spent more on was a professional photographer and videographer. Our friend's photos were lovely, but definitely not pro standard photos obviously! (MIL paid for this for SIL but that's another thread!) We don't have a wedding video and would love one to look back on and show the DC.

We spent £20k and I don't regret it.

We could have spent more but chose not to do favours or flowers.

I think the weddings I enjoy are those where guest comfort is prioritised. I.e. not waiting around for ages. I'm not a big fan of "Instagram weddings" where it feels like the focus is on making things look good rather than being enjoyable.

We spent about £35k- only flights on credit for insurance. It was perfect.

I wish we'd spent less. We had a day that fitted what we needed at the time - everyone we wanted there, decent food etc, but despite it not being anything mad it cost around £18k (Londonish and big families).

I know so many people during Covid who couldn't have their wedding of their dreams and were understandably gutted about it, but looking back if there had been a way us to go 'I'm really sorry we can only have 15 people, we'll have a big party after sometime' I'd have actually much preferred that.

I don't regret what we spent on our wedding but wish we'd spent more on our honeymoon, we both underestimated how tired we would be afterwards and it would've been nice to have a bit more luxury.
Wedding wise work out what to prioritise and let that be your guide, so for me I wanted lots of people to come and good food over a fancier venu that dictated caterers, which meant a village hall type venue. It annoyed me that fancier venues effectively dictated so much of the day "you can only have x wines' etc

I would have spent much less but DH wanted a fancy venue.

I wish we hadn’t spent so much, and hadn’t invited so many people.

We spent £10 in 2012 but had over 130 guests- I really wanted a massive fun day and that was what we had.

I can only presume you either missed off the "k", or your wedding breakfast consisted of the classic Mumsnet miraculous chicken!