Household chores for an 11 year old

[splatmouse]

I'm trying to compile a reasonable list of age appropriate household chores for 11 year old DD. What's typical to expect someone of this age to be responsible for? I might have to scale back a little, an 11 year old who has been doing bits from a young age will be different from someone starting now.

A couple of things to consider;
We don't have a dishwasher - so 'loading the dishwasher' would be extremely difficult!

We don't have any pets at the moment

She's the elder of two, younger child is 8 and has ASD. This brings up some issues like 'how come [brother] doesn't have to do chores and, also, I don't want to create a dynamic where the girls/women do housework while the boys/men are exempt. So I would be happy to also assign DS some age appropriate and ASD appropriate chores.

The plan was to type this and print it out. Make it as clear as possible. She could even maybe earn some pocket money by completing all the weekly chores (or would that complicate things?) I'd love to hear some ideas/ advice from others.

Making bed every morning, emptying waste bins in bathroom, checking supplies of shampoo/toothpaste/toilet rolls for shopping list, laying table for dinner, putting clothes to be washed in laundry basket, helping unpack and put away shopping.

When I was 11 - I washed up , cleaned my room once a week and walked the dog when I got home from school. I sometimes had to hoover the living room. I guess I was pretty lucky I didn't get any pocket money either

This is what I had my kids do; Help clean up after dinner. Keep their room clean-ish, all plates/cups had to be brought to the kitchen and washed before bed. Dusting around the house one a week, usually just one or two rooms. Take rubbish to the outside bins as needed. Starting a load of their laundry when needed, putting it in the dryer, and helping put it away. Hoovering occasionally. Help putting shopping away. Chopping veg for dinner a few times a week. Basically helping out when are where needed. Kids are very capable when they are taught how to be.

My childhood was a tad extreme so my experiences of what we kids did really arent appropriate now

Aged 11 and 8 with ASD, lots of things they could manage between them, dusting, emptying the waste bins, vaccuming, cleaning the bathroom sink, putting their laundry out for washing, making own beds, one dries the dishes, the other puts away, laying and clearing the table, lots of small tasks which you could probably do in half the time, but it helps teach them skills and routines they will need going forward

Dusting.
When I was younger than 11 my job was to dust and polish a large coffee table every week.
We had a list of extra jobs for our DC that would earn extra pocket money as well.

As a minimum take care of own room ie changing bed, hoovering, cleaning surfaces.puttung away laundry and putting dirty clothes in hamper .I would also expect a contribution union t towards cleaning the communal areas

Both DC should be responsible for making their own beds and keeping their own toys tidy (wherever those toys may be)
We all had ‘jobs’ to do every Saturday morning as kids. One of us would go to the laundrette with our Dad (which was the best because he always bought us a comic), one would do the dusting and polishing, one the hoovering up, one mopping the kitchen floor. The jobs would be rotated every week.
As we got older, we would all cook a meal once a week.

I’d start with something daily and something weekly. So maybe doing one wash a week (their bedding? Towels?) from start to putting away, or taking the bins out. And then something like clearing the draining board or wiping the surfaces in the kitchen or something daily.

The 11 year old should be able do everything you do: Vacuuming, sweeping, mopping, wiping sides, dusting, changing sheets, all things to do with washing, cooking/ preparing things for dinner, washing up, tidying their room, weeding, mowing the lawn.

Give them a few things they must do and then an option of 2 or 3 things from the list or a rota. E.g must tidy, vacuum and dust their rooms and they pick to put the washing on and hang it out. When my brother and I were 11 we’d do our own washing load once a week, wash out own dishes and help with the cooking.

Not sure about your 8 year old but you could make a list appropriate for their skills.

Washing up, vacuuming, cleaning bath/sink, changing the sheets, laundry, ironing (11 year old), cooking dinner once a week maybe.

Everything you do, except anything involving dangerous chemicals.

I used to have sweep and mop kitchen floor as my main chore. Ive just assigned this to my 10 year old and hes enjoying it. Hoovering is also a good one. Putting folded washing away is pretty easy to do. Dusting is easy too. You can always get them to do these things reguarly then do a deeper clean yourself once a month for example.

My 7 year old does the following (don't worry, I'm under no illusions that she's more likely to help happily now than when she's 11...)

Puts clean clothes away
Weed the plant beds in the garden
Water plants
Sweep the floor
Get breakfast for both of us
Helps me dust
Chops veggies for dinner and is learning to cook
Wash the car
Change the bedding on her bed

In the space of a week she probably does something from this list on 3-4 occasions. This is in addition to daily things that I've tried to engrain as habit like putting dirty clothes in the laundry basket and making her bed.

She likes helping particularly if we're working together on something, like making dinner or getting the spare room ready for a visitor.

Putting clean washing up away
Cleaning the bathroom sink
Vacuuming
Folding and putting away laundry

Are they responsible enough to load the washing machine /take clothes out of the dryer?
hoovering downstairs
cleaning the counter
putting dishes in sink
set the table before dinner ( I’d say this is suitable for 8 year old too)/ clean table after dinner.
Tidy sofa.

I think if you've gone from nothing, you probably have to build it up. It would seem a bit harsh to suddenly expect notable chores every day.

But this has reminded me that I haven't upped DS' chores over the last year or two and I must. Mostly he just does things like loading/unloading dishwasher and putting his washing away/tidying his room with the occassional bit of mopping or sweeping. I should get him to do more as he's now 13.

Clears the table after dinner and in this house loads the dishwasher. I suppose the equivalent is to wash or dry up.

sets the table

makes bed

puts away their own washing

helps tidy, largely by running around the house putting in the right room to save me from walking up and down the stairs!

sometimes hoovers but not very good at it.
washing in the basket.

clearing floors and sides in room for the cleaner.

not loads but is naturally helpful and quite tidy tbh

Thanks everyone for some great ideas, a lot of crossover too so some of those should be obvious choices. I appreciate the advice.

You might be lucky but beware and ready for eye rolling and the classic line I have to do everything around here lol

Getting her involved in cooking is a great one and hopefully something she will enjoy the 8 year old can lay the table

Start teaching her how to strip her bed and then she can have it ready on wash day then show her how to make it again and she could hoover and dust her own room it's her space if she's responsible for it its one less room for you to think about.
The 8yr old should also be making her bed and putting dirty clothes in the wash basket and tidying away her own items

Start them young and it's not so much of a shock

Well, for a start the 8 year old is starting their chore responsibilities three years before the 11 yo, so you could use that as a riposte!

But really I'd tackle it by making them responsible for their personal space and things. Eg sort and put away own clothes, make own beds. Everyone has to do that.

Then add in a "communal good" level of chore for the 11yo (e.g. cooking a simple meal), and assure her that the 8yo will begin the same when they reach her age.

For me, I'd add a third tier of "extra pocket money" chores, like dusting, weeding etc, so she can earn extra pocket money.

We don’t have chores as such in this house, but expectations of what my 11yo can do. This means keeping their room clean, putting dirty clothes in the hamper, putting their own washing away and changing their own bed.

they also shower themselves, wash and dry their own hair, teeth, choosing own outfits, pack own school bag.

they occasionally make their own lunch, always make their own breakfast and I am currently teaching them how to cook various dinners for the family.

every now and then I ask them to unload the dishwasher, get fresh water for the family pet, run the hoover around. But I don’t believe in having rigid chores that are expected of them daily / weekly and I also don’t agree with giving them pocket money to complete chores - We all live here so we all muck in!

I never gave my 2 any chores id ask them to do something like if they were heading out id say do you mind taking the rubbish out with you if your going but never really had chores.
Or please make sure your laundry is in the basket please.

I always saw it as i was the mother i will do it i never had my children to work for me.
They did things they felt they wanted to do or asked to do.
They grew up into 2 lovely men with spotless homes.
Very good cooks as well.

But looking back i know why i never gave them chores and they know why.
Because as a child thats all i was told to do chores washing up sweeping tidying mopping.
bleaching dusting scrubbing laundry.
My mum would not lift a finger in the end her mess was mine to clean up and it just got worse as the years went on.
Going to school was blissful because i could be a kid and not have to do chores.
But coming home thats all i heard you have chores to do get on with them.
And TBH i hate the word chores It's called helping each other in my home.

There's not really anything that an 11 year old can't do around the house. Does she do anything at the moment. If she does just build on that but really anything that needs done she should be able to do once shown.
The 8 year old should be able to do things like keep room tidy, make bed, bring dirty laundry through and put clean away. Set table, dry dishes, empty wastepaper bins, sweep and mop and maybe hoover. Depends really in how his ASD affects him but should be able to contribute.

This is me with my 2 girls we dont have chores either we all muck in.
I want them to have a chilldhood i didnt get not to have a list of chores everyday.

walnutcoffee my upbringing was the same as yours chores everyday and the list just got longer with my age i use to sit on a stall at 8 to wash up because i was too short to reach the sink.
And omg the weekends i hated it was non-stop i even had gardening on the list.
I was having none of it for my children.
I do also call it helping each other or lets muck in together soon be done and i make fun.
The word Chores for kids just makes me shudder.