Any adult dyspraxic women?

[Dyspraxiaexploring]

I’ve recently been formally diagnosed… anyone else out there? How does it impact you? What strengths do you have?

Yes 😂 just went to a gym class this morning and flopped and fumbled my way through. I would say a good sense of humour and a creative outlook are my strengths

I’m still learning to drive after taking lessons off and on for many years I’ve finally switched to automatic and now finding that easier! I find it hard to keep on top of housework and keep things tidy but I make a real effort. Another weakness is I can’t swim but apart from that I’m actually quite sporty - played in various team sports as a child and I’m ok at dancing.

I’m known as an “early” person but I’m actually naturally prone to lateness - again, I overcome that through sheer effort and aiming to arrive early.

I’m not very good with my hands when it comes to DIY and some other practical things but I can cook and bake well!

Other strengths are my creativity, empathy
perserversance and determination. I feel a lot of those things come from the fact dyspraxia gives me a different perspective and approach to some things, as well as makes me have to work a bit harder to achieve certain things.

I am very clumsy and cant judge speed or distance.

I don't drive. I don't think any dyspraxics should, it will never be safe for other people to have us on the road.

I cant sing or dance or play ball games with small balls, like tennis or rounders. I am better with large balls like netball or football

I can't use scissors. I can't use a bike or segway. I can't do hairstyles of myself. I can't do up an apron behind me. I can't learn an instrument. I drop things a lot. I fall over and bruise myself a lot and break bones occasionally.

Strengths? I am quite assertive, especially when people preach to me about growth mindset, etc! I am quite accepting of myself and good at finding ways around problems and barriers. I am good at assessing how bad an injury is and how to live with it as it heals

Completely disagree with that @evertheblue . My swimming instructor was dyspraxic and so was my last auto driving instructor. Their dyspraxia made them take a longer time to understand how to swim /drive but once they mastered it they did great and made a career out of it evidently.

If it’s not safe for you to be on the road though that’s fair enough but we’re all different. Definitely don’t think it applies to all dyspraxics though.

It maybe doesn't apply to all, but it does apply to many - which is obvious really, as dyspraxia means poor coordination and clumsiness, so it is always going to affect driving

I think dyspraxia is one of the conditions that should lead to an automatic driving ban. Even if people feel they are ok, they are likely not to be. And combine dyspraxia with even one alcoholic drink........

I have heard that view before but personally i’m definitely glad dyspraxia doesn’t @evertheblue lead to an automatic ban. And probably so are all the people the dyspraxic instructor in my town has helped to pass!

I’m uncoordinated in some contexts and prone to bumping into things when I walk etc but that doesn’t mean I won’t be able to drive.

Just looking at your initial post, for example, there are things you struggle with that are different for me (and it will be the same in reverse I’m sure)

You can’t ride a bike as an adult whereas I’ve been confidently riding a bike since I was about 7 years old for example. I was the last one to get my stabilisers off in my class and it took a mighty effort but I got there in the end ☺️ riding it every day as a tween certainly helped and I’ve cycled some periods as an adult. I was a 90s kid and I recall some kinds would ride “no handys” (both hands up instead of on the handle bars) that wasn’t something I could do confidently but because of that I felt I ended up being a safer cyclist than a lot of my peers who would be doing daredevil stunts like that to show off and inevitably have chaotic crashes into walls and trees etc lol

I passed my cycling proficiency test as a kid and have been a stickler for safety!

I can also use scissors and used them as a lot as a former educator . I do have to concentrate a bit more when cutting things but I’ve had no accidents with either scissors or bikes.

I sucked at tennis but I became good at rounders once an older kid taught me how to improve my hand-eye coordination and I could actually hit the ball.

I used to play piano, and did it quite well eventually. Initially though, I struggled to read music but I got round it in other ways like relying more on writing the fingering above each note at the start. But this meant I became a master at concentrating.

A lot of things haven’t came easily to me but once I’ve figured it out I’m just as competent as the next person - sometimes more.

And I’m sure there are many things i struggle with as a dyspraxic that you or others can do which I can’t! To be clear, I’m pointing these differences out to say that it affects people differently not to say “I’m great for being able to do this stuff and you can’t”

One example of that would be me as dyspraxic adult who sadly can’t swim and my instructor - also dyspraxic - who was had made a living out of teaching others swimming and was good enough to represent his national swimming team when he was younger.

We’re all different but I appreciate everyone has their own experiences which colour their perspectives…I just don’t like the idea of telling dyspraxic people or the parents of dyspraxic kids that they absolutely can’t do X , Y and Z, before they’ve even given it a try.

This is ignorant bullshit. I have dyspraxia and I am an advanced emergency response driver! It took a huge amount of time, practice and patience but I am actually a decent driver. Just because it impacts you doesn't mean it impacts all!

As a fellow dyspraxic diagnosed in my 30's I do have to say that I strongly disagree that we should not drive. I've driven a manual for 28 years having passed my test before diagnosis & its not unusual for me to drive in excess of 50 miles a day. I've never caused an accident or got a speeding ticket & I'm fine driving on the motorway.
I ride a bike, go to the gym regularly, own my own home & have a very full on demanding job.
I hate exercise classes/team sports but am a very good swimmer. I have to be careful with organisation. I can trip over fresh air.
Dyspraxia affects some more than others as its a spectrum that affects how information is processed. For me in some instances I have to break a process down & put it back together like a jigsaw. However it doesn't mean that I can't do it, it just means that I learn to do it differently.

I can’t drive (have tried lots of times to learn). It’s incredibly inconvenient and limited my career options . But I don’t think we should be banned, how it impacts me is obviously much worse in terms of spacial awareness than some others.

Interesting to see the challenges and strengths. I’m very organised and have everything on a calendar or with alerts on my phone but if I don’t I’m hugely forgetful. I will offer to make you a coffee and then completely forget a moment later.

Bull shit about dyspraxics should be able to drive..

I've been driving for 10 years and has my username suggests I'm dyspraxic. Yes it took me longer than others but I accepted that. And one argument is I'm a safer driver as I had more lessons than my 17 year old peers who past their test first time

Dyspraxia isn't that someone can't do something, it's that they do it differently, with their own coping strategies.

I can't swim or ride a bike , but I haven't been taught in a way that works for me .Although I can drive a manual car, but it took a lot of lessons.

I can use scissors to the same ability with either( which really annoys left handed people) .My handwriting is neater with my left hand , but it takes more effort for me to do. I'm crap at doing tiny, precise things . I couldnt thread a needle if my life depended on it.

I think there are some things I just can’t do. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t.

Dyspraxia isn't that someone can't do something, it's that they do it differently, with their own coping strategies.

I like this!

And it’s encouraging to see other dyspraxics here say they drive and do it well. Before I took a break from driving earlier this year, my instructor thought I was close to test standard. I plan to start lessons again next month and hopefully pass by autumn.

I’ll give it my very best shot anyway before I throw in the towel.

You can do it :)

Thank you! 😃

I struggle with lots of things. I drive, and have coping strategies for most things.

I struggle with all sports, styling hair and often find the house work gets ontop of me if we have a busy week, then I struggle to know where to start to catch up with myself and have to write a list and tick things off.

Been struggling recently and feeling quite low about my struggles with everyday things. Have been considering a.career change would like something with less antisocial hours but honestly don't know what my strengths are and what I'd be good at!

I am Dyspraxic. I couldn't do anything growing up and my parents just accepted that. I was laughed at and made fun of for being so uncoordinated, 'clumsy', gormless etc.

I spent a lot of money learning to drive and passed on my third test. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to learn and I almost gave up a few times but DH encouraged me to keep going. I've been driving safely for 10 years.

Learned to swim when I was 27 after many attempts over the years. Spent a full day in the pool until I could swim. My daughter is also diagnosed dyspraxia and I needed to be able to do things I'd previously given up on to encourage her.

We learned to ride bikes together, to roller skate together, we both have wobble cushions for our poor posture. We have to remind eachother to not 'tear' our food when using cutlery. We make light of our condition and have lots of laughs about it at times, if there's something that's difficult for us that we really want to do, we don't stop until we can do it.

Having a child with Dyspraxia changed my attitude completely. I was so quick to give up and write myself off. Now I just work harder to be able to do what most non-dyspraxics pick up easily.

I'm dyspraxic and I think I am a decent driver. Touch wood, I've never had an accident more serious than a bump while parking (three times, and I've been driving over twenty years). I agree that if you take longer learning, it tends to make you a more careful driver in the end. Recently I started learning to drive a forklift and also a truck and a van, and I noticed that my male colleagues have tended to have issues because they assume they'll automatically be really good from the start, whereas I take things really cautiously and stop if I don't feel safe.

Anyway. I'm terrible at catching a ball and I don't find it easy to do stuff like making flatpack furniture/understanding how a diagram translates into three dimensions. DD has to help me - she's been better than me for a few years now, and she's 7. In terms of strengths, I think I am good at figuring out how to do things, because I am used to the standard explanation/process not working for me. I also wonder whether it's dyspraxia, dyslexia, or pure chance responsible - but, although I'm not very co-ordinated, I can use my hands separately quite well. So I can use both hands at the same time, when most people just use their dominant hand.

I don't think you know much about dyspraxia. It can manifest very differently in different people. Some people on this thread say they couldn't learn to drive, but others will be fine.

And it's nothing to do with 'feeling' you're ok. You pass a test, just like everyone else.

I'm dyspraxic, and I know it does affect me, but it's difficult to tell what's what when I'm also autistic, adhd, and have a neurological illness and chronic pain that mean I'm mostly a wheelchair user. I was diagnosed with dyspraxia first though. One thing I've always struggled with is copying from a board or a book in class. I used to be able to ride a bike, but never well - I didn't quite go in a straight line and I was very slow, because I never got the peddling movement fluid. It was more pedal-pedal-pedal-pedal, than one fluid movement, I didn't even know it was supposed to be smooth until my late teens. Ditto swimming, slow, and poor technique. My handwriting is legible enough, but again very slow. At school I got away with it by focusing on "quality over quantity" in exams, my essays were always a couple of hundred words shorter than everyone else's and I'd be writing right up to the minute. Never learned to drive, but that's for other reasons. Can't imagine I'd be good at it though.
Lots of other struggles, following directions especially. But, I'm good at musical instruments. Some elements took me longer to learn than most people, but I put in the hours from a young age and ended up at pre-conservatoire level by the time I was a teenager. I could also sail a dinghy reasonably competently as a teenager, weirdly enough. Then I tried one that needed more balance and it was a nightmare.
My fine motor skills are generally accurate, but slow. My gross motor skills are more obviously questionable, I haven't run for a long time but when I could, I had a strange gait.

OMG, my life would be so limiting if I was refused a licence for having Dyspraxia .

Took me a year of 3 hour lessons to get the pass, I still all these years later dont parallel park ( although I passed that on the test ) and I remember saying to the instructor during the test when pulled over and waiting for a safe time to pull out, we could be here a while, I find it hard to judge distance and speed and I did collect a few minors for hesitation

Doesnt mean Im a bad driver, I know my limitations and I make sure I have a good clear space before I manoeuvre - over take/move back in - I dont take chances and I always leave space between me and the car ahead . I park in a car park rather then the roadside, even if I have a ten minute walk.

I was late learning to ride a bike, I can, and guess what, as a teen I learned how to balance and ride no hands :) But then I would ride my bike for hours on end, seriously hours, perfecting

I cant play any kind of ball sports, I just cannot judge the speed of the ball, but I can play pool

I cant follow a fitness class, I dont know my left from right unless I actually work it out mentally

Gym at school was pure hell

As is dancing , line dancing, cèilidh's etc yet I can boogie away myself :)

I cant screw a screw, or hammer a nail in straight

Im bruised tonight because in work, I cleared one of the dining spaces. This dining space I work not a bother. Only when cleaning it, I pull the tables out to sweep around and wipe the walls - walked into three of them because they were pulled out - distance between was off, not what I was used too

My feet are my worse enemy, i can trip on fresh air :)

But none of this has ever stopped me doing things. A lot of things I do badly but Ill give it a go, often with hilarity and sometimes bruised :)

I completely disagree. I was diagnosed with dyspraxia when I was 18 & have held a manual driving licence since my mid twenties. I drive 1000s of miles every year.
In nearly 20 years of driving I have had one car accident (12 years ago & it was the other person's fault) and have never recieved a fixed penalty notice. I am genuinely curious about why you think dyspraxic people are "not okay" driving? Have you struggled with it or know someone who has? It took me a while to get to grips with reverse parking but that was about it!
One of the things on my bucket list is to obtain my Category D licence & CPC so that I am qualified to drive a bus (not for work, just for fun!) Your comment about having an alcohol drink is interesting too. Why would that be relevant? Even if I wasn't dyspraxic I wouldn't drink and drive. It is reckless and selfish.
In answer to OPs question,
My dyspraxia affects my fine motor skills & handwriting (typing my exam papers at college & university was a game changer) & I have never been able to knit or crochet.
Over the years I have developed coping mechanisms for time management and organising my home. I find these things more difficult than other people and knowing I need to work on them because I am dyspraxic is useful.

The sentence about the hands really resonates with me. I am forever getting nagged for not laying tables correctly because for me it makes no difference as to which hand the knife and fork go in ( at work I always have to ask before I start - daily sometimes ) I use my left hand as much as I do right and I think that skill whats helped me when I was working as a chef, I really could deal with two different dishes at a time

I can't drive, assess distance (especially gap widths) or co-ordinate my arms and legs to dance. I always walk into things and scrape my arms and legs on the edges of door frames and tables due to the aforementioned gap assessing thing 😂

I'm very proud that I've been able to learn lots of the more straightforward dances at my Zumba class, even if it's taken years! 😬