Daughter fell and Social services now involved

[any009]

please help I’m so worried. My daughter fell off sofa last night while I turned my back for two seconds. She was perfectly fine after 2 minutes but I panicked about her going to sleep so I called 111 just to get some advice. They said everything sounds okay and she is aloud to go sleep but someone would ring me within two hours.

someone called within 30 mins to ask me to bring her in at 3:30am for a face to face appointment. I explained it’s not really necessary for me to wake her up in middle of the night and let her wait for ages in hospital when she’s fine. I asked if it’s ok for me to just take her to go they said it’s up to me.

so I woke up in the morning to call gp and while I was on the phone social services called me. I answered and she asked why I hadn’t taken her to hospital when it was advised but I said she was perfectly fine I just panicked and rang 111 for some advice. She said she is deeply concerned and I have to take her to doctors asap to make sure she’s okay I said I’m in the middle of that so that’s fine.

20 mins later social services are knocking at my door asking to assess my daughter. They checked her body for bruises marks or anything but she had nothing and was perfectly fine like I told them. I then went to the gp and the doctor ALSO said she is perfectly fine and he will put this in the notes.

social services called back to asked what doctor said I told them he said she is well and fine and they said okay will do another visit soon.

I’m so scared and worried my daughter is going to get taken off me I’ve been crying all day it’s all I can think about. Has anyone got any advice? Will they take this further?

Absolutely shocking! Can't believe that someone would be so hopelessly naive and reckless as to say ''A fall off a bed is a rite of passage for a baby''?

And to ''There there, Dear'' to the person in charge of that vulnerable infant, as if it was a pillow that fell to the floor.

Quite, I have 5 children and none of them have fallen off the bed/sofa as babies. Accidents of course happen but calling it a right of passage is downtime neglectful.

@Charlingspont they'd do better to stop wasting everyone's time & funding to actually do their jobs & follow up when there are cases of multi reports including by the child's family. This is just an easy caseload ticking nonsense.

They absolutely will leave you alone I'm sure. If there is no room for concern following visit you will be fine. I had a referral to SS from housing when I was applying for a house due to long term health problems and having explained that our situation with family during lockdown was very difficult! I was terrified but soon realised they are so overloaded with genuine cases that they won't bother you if there is no evidence to suggest there's a problem

I feel exactly the same. It really does appear like extreme over reaction or complete neglect despite multiple warnings! I don't wish to bash SS but instead blame the system,which is monumentality under resourced

Of course they won't take your DC! Thousands of children are actually abused and left until something horrific happens. They were just doing their job (this time) hope your DC is OK

Social Services are an inept bunch of useless bullying bastards, without a shred of competence or morality amongst the lot of them. Yes OP, I'd be nervous.

The person you need to be taking this up with is whoever referred. I'd be asking 111 why they referred to SS when they advised it was your choice and up to you. Tell them the stress it has caused.
Regarding social services just let them do their assessment don't panic too much she won't get taken away from you for that. Make it clear to them that 111 advises that if she seemed fine there was no need to bring her in and it was your choice and ask them for an advocate to be recommended to you for support so your rights are protected.

It's routine that social services are involved with an injury to a child. My son got hit on the head by my daughter with a wi remote and he had 3 gaping wounds in his head. I took him to the hospital and they questioned him to make sure his story stood up and to me are sure that he's not sustained the injury from me. Then a few days later social services called and we talked through what had happened and then they closed the case. I wouldn't worry they are not going to remove your daughter from you they just need to cover there backs.

Glad you are feeling better OP and no longer catastrophising over SS.

It was a reassuring response tbh, there have been some awful cases highlighted recently in the media, so glad this was taken seriously.

You did the right thing to seek advice, but if you are then not going to follow it, rightly of concern, especially for a young child who is so dependant.

Don’t be tempted to rely on Google, just because DC was okay this time, please go through the professional checks if they have another accident. DC are usually seen and assessed very quickly.

A medical professional is a mandatory reporter when it comes to safeguarding. On a factual basis - you were concerned and asked for advice, advice was given and you failed to follow through so they did what they’re supposed to do and raise a concern.
social services will investigate and will offer support if needed. If there have been other concerns in the past they will discuss these with you.

In my experience, ANY call to 111 results in advice to go to GP or a walk in centre. I think they just want to cover their backs 🤷🏼‍♀️ when you get to A&E, you sit there for 12 hours and then get told you’re fine. IMHO there is absolutely no point in calling 111.

You never did say how old she is.

I rang 111 for advice on tinny pain for my daughter which came on after school one day and got worse into the evening. I just wanted their advice but they asked to see her due to it being better to rule things out with a physical examination. She’s 11 years old so I wasn’t expecting them to ask to see her. When they eventually rang back with an appointment it was the last evening slot at 10:45pm. I was on the phone at 10:25ish being offered this time and knowing I’d just about make 10:45. She said as long as she knew I was on my way it would be fine. We turned up and it wasn’t a&e which I was expecting but a separate out of hour clinic in the hospital. We were the only ones there. We had a very short wait as the GP on duty had been called through to A&E. I have to say, we got the most thorough examination I’ve ever seen from the lovely doctor ruling everything she could out and finally deciding it was likely a virus as she had a slight temperature despite taking some calpol or possible also indigestion (which my daughter does get alot). We were advised to follow up with the gp when we could get an appointment.

In previous years my younger daughter had croup. We called 111 and they wanted to send an ambulance but they did allow us to drive her in the car as it would be quicker and also we live really close to hospital. It’s interesting that some people have been sent an ambulance after requesting not to have one.

Both my kids have had falls and ended up in out of hours or a&e and we’ve never been referred to social services so I’m not sure how someone has said all falls resulting in a&e attract a referral. I suspect it was the refusal to take her during the night that was the red flag. Personally I would have taken her if I’d worried enough to call them and then that’s what they suggested.

It's not true as a standard policy. I think it depends if the doctor or nurse at A&E are concerned about your explanation.

My nephew at 3 years old played with his granddad and fell backwards against a table. He had a bleeding wound on the back of his head.

I took my sister and him to A&E. The doctor asked what happened, we explained it and there was no follow-up.

5 month old babies wriggle around and can fall off sofas.

I have a 3 month old, I put her on the bathroom floor the other day when I went to the toilet. I was surprised to see she manoeuvred herself into a complete different spot by wriggling around.

Unfortunately, with a small baby, if you call 111 and they tell you to take the baby to A&E, you basically have to. Otherwise this happens. This was passed around Mum friends and NCT group.

Whoever you called was either marking off a checklist and over checked some things, or they got some sort of attitude about you using your own best judgement instead of relying on their "expertise" and they put you down as an emergency case that needs immediate help. In the USA when this happens, they just make some visits, do an inspection, offer some free shit (take it, why not, they are causing you stress and wasting time and resources) and then write a letter saying they found no issues that need their presence. When you have an autistic child or child with a disability of some sort, this sort of shit just becomes a part of life. I have learned to just roll with it and take all the resources they want to offer me. It got my son resources for autism faster than them not reporting me. School would still be messing around if they hadn't reported me. Cost them more than it ever did me. They were the ones that had to pay for an expensive private school.

I know it’s hard not to worry but they are just doing their job and it’s obviously flagged up on their system.

I remember when DD1 was little she fell down the stairs, I took her to Urgent Care (better safe than sorry) all was ok, but the next day someone called and wanted to talk through what happened. I too was so worried. They were happy with my responses and never heard from them again.

I have noticed with both children now when you go to hospital they always ask if SS are involved, they never used to do that.

I know it's a difficult position to be in, OP. I sympathise and can understand your worry
However I am glad to hear that it has been taken seriously. Not all cases will be genuine, and I'm pleased that it's being checked out stringently. The more child deaths can be prevented, the better.
Please try not to worry to much x

Please please don't worry, it's just procedure that has to be followed up. I'm actually astounded at how quickly they did this, most likely due to the real cases of child abuse which have been been far too slow to intervene, so measures have been put into place. Yours was genuine concern, ringing 111 is recorded and passed on automatically so goes through the different lines of procedure. We all feel this as mothers, if our kids get hurt accidentally we worry there will be an investigation but really the staff know we have taken them for medical care as we're concerned but a protocol is followed. My goodness, when we found our dc eating out a tub of kids multivitamins, which they shouldn't have even able to open, we knew there weren't many left but still took them to a and e feeling so guilty and prepared for an onslaught of responsibility. We had put them onto a high table but the little darling had managed to knock them off and snuck off to eat them as guess they tasted like sweets, all within a matter of seconds! They know these things happen and go through the tick boxes, you will be fine, kids do have (a lot of) falls, didn't we all?

Take a deep breath. Because it would help if you were more confident.

Where is your family? Where is your support? Where is the father?

Are you on any drugs or alcohol? Do you have a history of social services?

Why did you dial 111 if your child fell off the sofa?

Why did you refuse a face-to-face appointment, being called back within 30min for an immediate appointment?

You have every red flag in the book screaming.

Your daughter needs to be assessed by a doctor to check there are no injuries, or that your daughter is at risk.

I understand anxious parents. They want their children assessed immediately. But they don't panic and 30min later say, nah, no need for a doctor.

Where is your support network?

Do you have an abusive boyfriend?

Your best step forward is to go to your GP. Because you are panicking and not coping. Once they assess your daughter is not being abused - you will get support. If they suspect your daughter is being abused - you will also get support.

Abusive parents panic when they beat their children, or shake them violently, and they go floppy and then they make up an accident for their children.

Most parents don't dial 111, if their child falls off a sofa.

Or if she's just an infant, they really want a doctor to check her over and make sure she's okay.

Whatever is going on, your daughter will be assessed.

But seriously, your GP, who will have a safeguarding lead at the practice, is a really good point of contact for ongoing care and getting appointments when your child needs appointments.

They are a very human face, who have at risk children on their weekly care plan. And as a GP, they will look after the entire family.Take the GP appointment.

For the sake of both you and your daughter. Take the medical assessment appointment. Take the support that is offered.

Please don't worry. It will be absolutely fine. They err on side of caution.

Even if you had of taken her, SS would still have at the very least called or scheduled an on the spot visit.
My DD had an accident at about 4, she jumped off something and split her chin. Took her straight to A&E, she had it glued. Total freak accident, I was very honest about it, Nurse was quite rude actually about it, very condescending. Asked DD questions.

Day after tap on the door, two social workers, very official but sent packing because I repeated exactly what happened and DD showed them how she hurt herself and "mummy told me not to jump down". One of them got daft and said I should have tried to catch her- I pointed out I'm dyspraxic do no chance and would've probably made it worse

Don't stress, because that will cause more drama. Be matter of fact about it. Say you can understand the concerns but DD was sleeping, was being regularly checked by you, GP was sought immediately the next day and has no concerns.