Daughter fell and Social services now involved

[any009]

please help I’m so worried. My daughter fell off sofa last night while I turned my back for two seconds. She was perfectly fine after 2 minutes but I panicked about her going to sleep so I called 111 just to get some advice. They said everything sounds okay and she is aloud to go sleep but someone would ring me within two hours.

someone called within 30 mins to ask me to bring her in at 3:30am for a face to face appointment. I explained it’s not really necessary for me to wake her up in middle of the night and let her wait for ages in hospital when she’s fine. I asked if it’s ok for me to just take her to go they said it’s up to me.

so I woke up in the morning to call gp and while I was on the phone social services called me. I answered and she asked why I hadn’t taken her to hospital when it was advised but I said she was perfectly fine I just panicked and rang 111 for some advice. She said she is deeply concerned and I have to take her to doctors asap to make sure she’s okay I said I’m in the middle of that so that’s fine.

20 mins later social services are knocking at my door asking to assess my daughter. They checked her body for bruises marks or anything but she had nothing and was perfectly fine like I told them. I then went to the gp and the doctor ALSO said she is perfectly fine and he will put this in the notes.

social services called back to asked what doctor said I told them he said she is well and fine and they said okay will do another visit soon.

I’m so scared and worried my daughter is going to get taken off me I’ve been crying all day it’s all I can think about. Has anyone got any advice? Will they take this further?

Please stop goading the OP as not everyone has time to spend on forums as most ask a question and then deal with real life
OP, I hope its all well and sorted and please try not to worry.

Why are people obsessing over the kid's age? OP has said "baby", surely that's enough

It is just protocol for the SS, it is their duty of safeguarding, they are there for those babies/children who live with neglecting or abusive parents, but in order to find those in need of protection, they have to treat every child and parent in the same way at first.anf follow a protocol. For the majority of cases it does not escalate and it is not followed up. However they need to do it for every child in other to protect children.
You and your daughter will be fine. X

I do wonder in these cases how inconsistent children's services seems to be.. It seems like they are either really thorough like in this case but then you hear of countless stories of children being abused for years with social services involved and nothing is done until the child is dead or seriously harmed. Op don't worry, you will be fine but I understand your worry. It'll be okay.

Are you reading a different thread? Or you read a different post and thought it was by OP?

I've read OPs posts several times and nowhere does she say the age at all, let alone specify 5 months.

Are you perhaps hard of thinking or being deliberately obtuse?

The OP made another thread about this, where they state the age.

"Are you perhaps hard of thinking or being deliberately obtuse?"

I’ve taken small children to a&e before. Six month old toppled out of his high chair, cracker of a bruise on his cheek. They never called social services (i fully expected them to do so). It seems a bit random/arbitrary

Not really.

A newborn won't roll off the sofa for instance.

The posters jumping in to say OP has done nothing wrong and CYPSS are looking for 'easy targets' are unhelpful as OP hasn't really given relevant information and is seeking reassurance that CYPSS are being over zealous when that reassurance really shouldn't be given.

Every single case of infants being victim of violent death or injury come up with "they rolled off the bed or sofa when i turned my back for a second, they fell off something.. their older sibling might have pushed them over"

No-one ever says "I shook the baby, hit the baby, punched the toddler". It doesn't happen that anyone admits that.

Yesterday I watched Police personal camera footage of Christina Robinson who murdered her 3 year old after physically abusing him for most of his life and she seemed like a calm Mum who had experienced an acute medical episode in her child and had done the right thing, calling 999.

This is why medics and CYPSS need to take notice and investigate.

Medics and CYPSS have to do their job. Please, don't ever tell anyone online or otherwise that they've done nothing wrong or CYPSS are being officious when children are killed and abused every single day by their caregivers.

Yes it might be uncomfortable or might seem intrusive but put your feelings aside and realise it's designed to protect children from harm.

It's not hard of thinking or being deliberately obtuse to not realise that the OP may have several threads on the subject and try and seek them out.

It's odd to do that. Usually it happens when the OP doesn't like responses on one of their threads.

It is also odd for someone like yourself to accuse people of being hard of thinking or obtuse because something that was said on another thread should be considered on this, completely different thread

People here were defending the OPs lack of response to questions as she was a great Mum busy looking after her DC and not able to respond to questions which could be very reasonable, but doesn't quite fit if OP is making multiple threads that you, bizarrely seem to think we should all be aware of.

It is also odd for someone like yourself to accuse people of being hard of thinking or obtuse because something that was said on another thread should be considered on this, completely different thread
Yes, it is. Extraordinarily so.
People who live in glass houses...

Do you see the line break in my comment? That typically indicates a pause, a stop, or a change in topic.

I answered the poster I quoted on the age of the child.

Then I made a separate comment (which funnily enough is related to what I've said in the same paragraph!) about the reasons for SS being in contact.

You seem to be picking at me for no reason. Did you sleep OK last night?

What a waste of resources. Honestly. WE and our families in crisis can't get a social worker half the time when we NEED one at our primary school for actual serious family issues. And they have time to wander back over a common household accident one-off where someone actually did ring for advice to make sure they were doing the right thing.

FFS

I know someone who had ss involvement after their child burnt themselves, I don’t think they were worried about the parents deliberately hurting the child but that they weren’t being supervised properly which wasnt the case. This family were younger parents and lower income and I also know someone, middle class older mother, who actually broke her child’s leg while playing a rough game and had absolutely no ss involvement at all. So I suspect whether they get involved has a lot to do with how you are personally perceived by hospital staff and ss.

You posted this:

kittensinthekitchen · Today 10:23

NotQuiteNorma · Today 09:33

I'm more concerned that you won't say how old the child is because it is extremely important to the advice you will get and why social services may now be involved. Are we talking about a 5 year old child falling off the sofa or a six week old baby? There's a huge difference.
Show quote history

YOUR POST:

It's in the thread - 5 months!

So many posters on this thread either hard of thinking or deliberately obtuse. Social Services did not contact OP because she sought advice over an accident, or because there was an accident - but because she was asked to take the baby for an urgent medical appointment then failed to do so"

So in response to a reasonable enquiry about the age of the DC you were shitty and said they had said this on the thread - 5 months.

And went on to say posters were hard of thinking or deliberately obtuse in their assessment of this case where the age IS very important.

I said you were wrong and the OP had not said that on the thread. I was correct. You went on to say the OP had another thread where they had said the age of the child was 5 months.

You were judging people as hard of thinking or obtuse in their responses to the OP which did not include the information that is relevant. The age of the DC is very relevant, that's why people were asking.

You then went on, as I corrected you to say the OP had 'other threads' saying the DC was 5 months, as if everyone on this thread should know that when they really shouldn't.

So you were incorrect saying the OP said the DC was 5 months on this thread when she hadn't at all. And that influenced your consideration of this OP.

And you now can't back down and admit you were wrong and want to start some kind of argument because it's damaging your ego that you were in fact, very wrong in what you said.

I know it's tough when people point out that you were wrong and it's quite common to lash out and accuse me of being ridiculous or sleep deprived or whatever but honestly, just accept it and move on.

This is a good point, after my toddler made a silent 999 call once, the pilice came back a couple of times to put eyes on everyone in the house. It shows the system works. I understand why you are worried op, it's only natural to be, but if anything it shows the system is working and that you and your child are protected.

Not just my area. Most areas.

I would imagine it's very much a postcode lottery like all services

I have not once claimed that the OP said the age of their child on this thread I said that the age has been said on the thread. You've quoted exactly what I said, yet not read or understood it. If that makes me wrong, okay, whatever.

I'm not going to engage with you any further.

I have limited experience and itbrelated to an MH issue relating to an older child.

I took a call from SS. The gentleman who called me could barely be understood as his accent was so strong, he also assumed he could use my first name whilst expecting me to call him Mr xxxxxx.

He said he was calling to see if we needed support. When I asked what that suppprt would look like he couldn't tell me. When I asked precisely why he was calling me if he wanted to offer support but didn't know what it was he didn't answer. He just said he'd close the case. He could give me no details about the nature of the referral, suppprt or why he was closing the case.

I complained and received an apology. He was a qualified social worker. It was a tick box exercise conducted by somebody without adequate communication skills.

God help a person who actually may have needed support or a child in actual danger.

I only had the confidence to kick up a stink because in no circumstances could my family have been deemed vulnerable.

The above happened because in a five month period my dd was assessed by CAMHS as needing no NHS help. She was safety netted privately but went to the local NHS ED to make sure she had done no permanent harm by taking 11 anti-histamine 48 hours earlier. ED did not bother to phone me for three hours, during which time they decided to admit her overnight with a MH 1:1 nurse to facilitate a CAMHS assessment the next morning. When dd was assessed we were told she would need urgent therapy, after a reassessment they then said it wasn't urgent and there would be a three month wait.

Pre the admission, five assessments, no help, admission three assessments to say she didn't need swift help. That must have cost £600 plus £950 for the admission. And yet there are no resources. Actually there are, they are just being pissed up the wall rather than suppprt being provided.

Luckily we had £8k to spend on MH care and dd made a full recovery.

Apologies for digressing but the top to bottom mismanagement and waste is gobsmacking.

You said it "it's in the thread- 5 months"

I posted your post

What did you mean by that? I think everyone would think you meant this thread, the one that is being discussed.

Can you clarify how you didn't mean this thread if indeed that's what you meant as I'm very confused why you posted it otherwise?

If you meant "OP posted on another thread", you didn't say that. You said "it's in the thread" in response to someone saying the OP wasn't giving the age of the DC.

What am I missing? You got shitty with someone saying the OP hadn't disclosed the age of the DC and said "it was in the thread". The OP hadn't disclosed the age of the DC in the thread and still hasn't in this thread so...why were you asserting "it's in the thread" when it isn't?.

If you want to argue "well the age was said in the thread but not by the OP" then you were still wrong in making shitty comments to posters ASKING OP the age of the DC in this thread because they were asking the OP and she'd said nothing about the age so you jumping in being snarky and suggesting people were hard of thinking based on the OPs vague posts is just you being silly.

Seriously, just admit you were wrong. You won't though.

What have I just read

@kittensinthekitchen you were wrong. Get over it.

Yes. I do appreciate that some areas have different thresholds and resources but it's really very unusual for CYPSS to knock on the door within 24 hrs of concerns unless there are extreme concerns not disclosed here. In most cases.

And I think that'll be most areas

Different doctors take different slightly different approaches to things for one thing, and some things are more expected than others.

6 month olds can be fairly mobile- it’s believable that one would tip itself out of a high chair while someone turned round for a moment

but it’s less believable that a week old baby rolled off the sofa for example (we don’t know how old the baby in the op is)

Also you took the baby to hospital- op was told to and didn’t so it’s completely different. Hospital expecting baby with possible injuries and the baby doesn’t turn up= if we don’t check and this baby is dead (because it did fall off the sofa or because actually someone shook it or stomped on it or whatever) we will all be in the shit.

Thanks for stating this.

Children are abused and killed, and excuses are always given, as you so rightly say.
Babies also can't speak up to say what happened.

Social workers must see some awful things that stay with them, and no one wants a seriously hurt child on their conscience- thinking ''I could have possibly helped prevented that from happening ''

Trauma stays with even very young children- Social workers aren't ''The enemy''.