Currently hiding in the bathroom crying ...

[fishfishandmorefish]

It's mother's day. I'm a mum. DH and teen DC at home. I got nothing just a card (am I being ungrateful?). I mostly spent the day alone, except for seeing my parents. Cooked dinner for DC. Currently have uniform washing.
Brought my mum chocs, flowers & afternoon tea (she went with my dad, my dad needed the treat more than I did). Think my mum was a bit taken back when she asked what I got and I said nothing. Not even any fuss or "time off" from the usual grind. DH watched football at home all afternoon, he took over the whole living room and firmly Closed the door for it. IMO He's now drunk (says he's not but he's had 10 cans of beer).
Back to the grid tomorrow. Me 46hr week. DH 36hrs. I do 10hrs a week overtime for extra cash.

My period is due, maybe that's why I'm emotional tonight. Just needed to get it off my chest
Thanks for reading x

Ah I'm so sorry OP, that's shit.

That's shit and points to a much bigger problem than mother's day. I'm sorry OP

Ahh sorry you're sad. I get it. I'm another one in the got nothing club, not even a card. I've been at work all day. Not sure how to approach it with DP. Will you say anything?

I’m so sorry yours was shit. Mine was too…. Middle had 2 huge meltdowns… my other half didn’t want to see me this am - no idea why. The youngest then had a tantrum and all hell broke loose at mealtime. My children dad came and collected them. I’m in floods of tears. Happy Mother’s Day!

You need to tell them they are treating you like hired help they do not respect.
Don't be a martyr they won't notice or thank you for it.

Sorry to hear that OP. Mines not been great either. I have two young adult Dads who live at home still and one has barely even acknowledged the day, let alone made any fuss. It hurts when you do so much for them throughout the year,

Make sure you have something nice planned for yourself to do on Father's Day so that he gets the same level of attention that you did.

OP you’re not crying because your period is due. Your DH has had 10 cans of beer and says he isn’t drunk? That alone sounds like an issue that is not yours to internalise. Sending you strength 💐

@Akj29 sorry to hear that, hugs to you. I won't say anything. DH just asked me what was wrong. He pushed me to reply, so the first thing I said was that he's drunk. He denied it and said I'm clearly looking for an argument. I wasn't at all. I've now come to bed

@Strugglingmumof3 sorry to hear your day was shit too. Big hugs xx

So sorry.
I clicked and started reading your message expecting it to be one of those "I'm a precious primadonna" but my heart goes out to you.
That is really shit of your husband.

My husband watched the football on telly in the sitting room all afternoon too (fine, I wasn't expecting being taken on a cruise or something for mother's day), but at least he made sure DC were with him so I could chill, he's now making a special evening meal for us in the kitchen.

Your husband is thoughtless, possibly an alcoholic??

I do agree that it would have been nice for your husband to do something more. At the very least cook dinner or something.

You were not truthful with your mother..... you did get something. You got a card.

I am sorry you are going through this. Is this normal for your family on Mother's Day or is this year different for some reason.

Why not just tell him the truth?

If you decide to say something, start with the word 'I'. 'I feel that...' is unarguable, because it's how you feel.

@2Old2Tango sorry to hear you've also had a shit day. We do so much and there is no recognition. Hugs to you

I cannot believe how many bad husbands and fathers there must be around.
So sorry op.

I'd remember this and when you feel stronger seriously question WTAF you're in this relationship. Next year ask your mum to take DC to get a plant or something. This does not bode well and having been there myself for years I can tell you the hassle of divorce is 100% worth it.

Is he always like this?

I think you should say something. No passively but directly- “I’m upset no one Mande effort for me on Mother’s Day”. Also I’d make no effort on Father’s Day, he may or may not care but don’t go out your way for someone who won’t for you.
Next year maybe treat yourself and leave them to make their own food etc.

@anareen mum knew I got a card. When she got her gifts from me, she asked me what I got (meaning gift wise). To that I replied "nothing".

@DreamyCritic I started to tell him, except i only got to the "you're drunk" part, with the rest due after, except he stormed off saying I was looking for an argument which he "was going to give me"

Really sorry, op. You sound a great mum and it must be so disappointing to get nothing, no acknowledgement. So I, just a stranger on the web, wish you all the best on Mother's Day. 🌺

Sorry for your bad day. I’d be calm and clear, tell them yiu feel totally taken for granted. What will change

Tons of bad husbands… mine is currently knocking up dinner. He’s run around all day really - took DD12 to buy me a present earlier in the week and made me pancakes for breakfast but if he hadn’t I would be ordering a take away or going out. If there was no evidence of anything happening this morning I would have said “ what’s happening for dinner because I’m not cooking it”.

Tbh I think teens see Mother’s Day as a thing for small kids, and I wouldn’t expect teens to do more than a card.

The main thing is you work so hard for your family. The person who should be very grateful to you is your DH.

i bet when your teen is your age they will be doing the whole afternoon tea routine because by then they will know what it took.

I also got nothing but it is just a made up day. I am a teensy bit bothered but not really. I'd be upset if it were my birthday though (which he forgot twice.) I have to remember what he's good at (scrubbing and resealing our kitchen floor for 4 hours last week in his day off...for instance.)

He didn't get drunk watching the football though to be fair.

I do expect teens to do more than a card…. They can get off their arses and bake a cake or something. They’re lazy not incapable.

I started to tell him, except i only got to the "you're drunk" part, with the rest due after, except he stormed off saying I was looking for an argument which he "was going to give me

You started off with the wrong part.