Positive stories of speech delay please - worrying myself silly

[T1nkerbelll]

I know this is a very common subject on these boards but I am worrying myself silly with my son’s development and need some words of encouragement please.

My son is 22 months and barely speaking. He probably says around 5-8 words, but that includes some animal noises, and does babble sometimes but not a great deal. I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole of reading autism symptoms that I’ve recognised in him including: focusing on my lips when I’m talking to him, he’ll often fall into a trance - usually when sat in his highchair where he likes to stare at a spotlight in the kitchen, can seem like he’s ignoring me or doesn’t hear me, lines up toy cars, has to shut a cupboard door if it’s open, and of course his speech delay.

On the flip side he does have good understanding of what is being said to him. For example if I ask him to sit on the step and put his shoes on, he will follow the instructions and find his shoes, sit on the step and attempt to put them on etc. He shows interest in other children and attempt to engage in play with them. He points to things, he brings me things, he waves/claps/blows kisses and can do actions to his favourite nursery rhymes. He’s got good gross motor skills and can climb stairs leading with one foot, kick a ball etc. He does play ‘appropriately’ with toys (as well as line them up); push cars round a track/down a ramp, says hello when he puts a toy phone to his ear, brush his hair with a hairbrush etc.

But I’m not concentrating on any of that, all I can see is the negative and the things I keep reading on Google. I am pushing for a hearing test for him as his older sister has hearing problems although this never affected her speech. He is very dribbly, and a mouth breather, so I do wonder if he has enlarged adenoids/tonsils but think that’s just me hoping it’s physical rather than developmental.

I’m feeling so miserable about it all and just want my little boy to talk to me. And then start worrying about what the future will look like. Help 😭

Get his ears tested

His hearing

I remember having a HV check with DS when he was nearly 2.5, it had been delayed due to Covid. His speech was good at this point, but I remember saying to her if she’d come even just a few months earlier, I’d have been saying I was really worried about his speech, as he had barely any words at all. She said it was really normal for an explosion in speech at some point between 2 and 2.5, and it was common when they did the 2 year checks that they needed to come back a few months later- but the majority of kids they had worried about at 2 were saying loads just a few months later. Obviously that’s not to dismiss any concerns you have as I get there are other things you’re worried about, but at 22 months it’s definitely in the realms of normal.

I had to have speech therapy as a child, as literally no one could understand me. Also had to have additional support with reading in reception class. All was resolved, and I talk fine now and love reading 😬

@T1nkerbelll the hearing test referral was made in November, and the appointment is in two weeks' time now. Thank you ❤️

DS was similar &, at 11, you could say he'd grown out of it but it did involve a few interventions along the way including 6 weeks of NHS SALT, a year of private SALT and having his ears suctioned at semi regular intervals, usually on the NHS but, as waits got longer and we also got better at identifying it before it became a major issue, privately as then it was dealt with

How's your son doing now OP?

My DS was slow to do everything. Walk talk, he just wasn't bothered. He caught up with everything eventually, he's 8 and is a very good all-rounder, he's doing well at school, with sports, with friends etc. But he's still not keen to do things for himself, I think the late talking was a symptom, to be blunt, he's lazy! He's fine at school because he's keen to behave well and do well, but if he could get a minion to do everything for him, he absolutely would! I think it always was just his personality, and I am aware we'll need to work on independence more than his older sister because he just doesn't desire it. On the plus side, as a toddler he NEVER had a tantrum. He was always just content to go with the flow, he was always happy. Whereas his elder sister is fiercely independent and had horrendous tantrums on a daily basis, she was always frustrated and trying to run before she could walk. The worst tantrums were reserved for those who were trying to help her with something, she wanted to do everything herself. They're all just different, yes speak to your HV to get the balls in motion, we did, but it may well be nothing.

His speech still isn’t great; I paid for a private speech therapist assessment who was very helpful and said she thought it was hearing related due to the lip reading and the sounds he can/can’t make.

We were referred to audiology, and although he passed the hearing test, they confirmed he has glue ear in both ears. So now waiting to see an ENT consultant. I’m not sure if he’s too young to have grommets/adenoids out, or if it would even help with his speech, but will see what they say.

My DS was a bit of a slow starter and only had a handful of words at 2.
Now at 4 he's the biggest chatterbox going and much easier to understand than his peers (it's not just me saying this, he's got objectively very clear speech).

My son still had terrible delay at 3, it affected him socially also as could not communicate with other children, NHS provision was rubbish (due to lack of staffing to actually provide the appointments which were invariably cancelled last minute) I ended up paying privately. By reception he had improved but still a bit behind and struggled socially, he's now 8 and has no issues, even had a change of school due to moving area and has managed brilliantly, great in all subjects and lots of friends

how did people find a private help as one of my nephews is struggling with this in primary school?

I just Googled private speech and language therapists in my area 🙂

My son didn't really start talking until after he had his eyes tested at 2.5. It turns out he has really poor eye sight which stopped him seeing people's faces clearly and the shapes their mouths made. He had speech therapy at 3 or 4 and now he's 12 and we can't shut him up!

@T1nkerbelll Hello, some update?

Hi, he is making progress albeit quite slowly. He’s up to about 50 words and is starting to put them together.

My DS was the same. He’s 3 in May. He said odd words but it was so difficult to coax them out of him. He had such a good understanding though. I was getting concerned but HV, nursery, GP etc all said they wouldn’t do anything until his 2 year review. Then one day around 22/23 months old he just came out with a sentence while playing, he was doing a jigsaw and put a piece in correctly and he just clapped and said “yay mummy I did it.” Clear as day. I was like what the actual f*?!?!! I literally did a double take and looked up and him and I swear the kid smirked at me. Only the day before I’d been calling private speech and language clinics desperate for someone to see him! Then I cried. DH came in and DS said it again. And again. And again. And then we couldn’t shut him up! It was like he’d been taking it all in for months and had suddenly decided to just start talking.

He did take a bit of time to catch up - at his 2 year check when he was 26 months he wasn’t hitting everything for speech (although far better than he was months before) and so they referred him for a hearing test and said they’d give him until after that result to see how he was coming on before formal referrals for SALT, as it could be he just needed time to catch up given he’d only started properly taking recently. He had his hearing test 3 months later and we took him back to HV for another speech assessment and he hit every milestone and nothing was wrong.

I took him to the see the HV last week for weight and height check and she said “look at that digger on your top” and he told her very seriously “no it’s a bulldozer” and she laughed and said to me remember when you were so worried about his speech? This morning he was having breakfast with my MiL and told me “mummy you go to work, me and Nanny have weetbix and milk. Not for mummy, not mummy’s breakfast” and it’s hard to believe this time last year he was hardly saying a word!

OP DS was a late talker - 19 months for his first words. He had glue ear and also a mild tongue tie that wasn't diagnosed until he was about 8 so never corrected. He did struggle at school a bit in the early years with his reading, saw an educational psychologist as school were worried about dyslexia, but assessments showed it was simply down to glue ear (which cleared by itself) and being late August born. He's in Y11 now and on track for 8/9's in his GCSE's, it just took a bit of time for him to catch up. Ironically, (given he couldn't read until he was about 7-8) his strongest subjects are essay ones - English, History and Classics. I do remember the huge worry though.

DS was slow to talk. We had his hearing tested. Fine. Although it did turn out he has autism, he wasn't non verbal. The OT said he was being lazy as he'd rather point than work to form a sentence & we had to stop assisting until he made the effort to use words.

They were right. He's 12 now & hasn't shut up since. We say he's making up for the speech delay!!

Anywy, it could be anything, but get it checked.

@MermaidMummy06 what was his speech like at 3/4 if you don't mind me asking!

I could have literally written this myself. My son is nearly 2 and for the last 3/4 months have been beside myself with worry.
He says maybe 10-20 "words" - not clear - sounds animal noises and counting.
He starts nursery at 2 so I am hoping this will help.
How is your son doing now?

@AMBTS181403 sorry to hear you are going through the same thing, it’s such a worry isn’t it. Have you had his hearing checked?

My son had grommets in Spring last year and it was like a light switch had been turned on. New words daily, he started copying words which he had never really done before, and now he doesn’t stop talking. I love hearing his little voice and when he doesn’t shut up I have to remind myself that a year ago I could never imagine it.

He still has some clarity issues and a little way to go to catch up to his peers but his speech therapist is happy to let him progress naturally and see him again in the summer before he starts school.

Sending you hugs as I know how hard it is 💐

My second was like this, said a few words and they were unclear. She’s 3 next month and has suddenly started speaking at the age related expectations in the last 8 weeks or so