Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Daughter solo traveller. Money is extorted by police

77 replies

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 16:42

Since she was seventeen, my daughter has insisted on travelling alone. She has been to Chile, Argentina, virtually every European country. Now she is in a Mexican sea side resort and last night was on the beach with two other tourists. The beach was empty ( crowded during the day) and at night, the bustling sea side town becomes empty … now I know why. 3 heavily armed police came onto the beach in a van. They planted perfectly rolled spiffs in the sand in plain sight. They then went up to my daughter and companions. They accused them of being in possession of drugs, threatened to handcuff and take them to the station. They clearly had guns in their bulky uniforms pockets. My daughter cried. They rifled through all the three’s bags and took a total equivalent of £500. They then let them go. My daughter was shaken and phoned me at 5 am last night. I hate her solo travelling. Every time she has the opportunity, she takes off and goes on these solo holidays. Anyone else have a solo travelling adult child, or is a solo traveller? Is this untypical? Probably typos in this but on my phone and in a hurry. Would appreciate feedback. Thank God she is flying back in four days!

OP posts:
ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 07/03/2024 16:46

I wouldn’t have let my 17 year old daughter travel alone whether she insisted on it or not.

Charlingspont · 07/03/2024 16:47

Something similar happened to a friend of mine at the airport or her way home from Mexico 30 years ago. Border guards took every penny she had on her, including any jewellery.

Sorry this happened.

Roussette · 07/03/2024 16:49

You have my sympathy!

Just before the Ukraine invasion, my DD solo travelled to Moldova, the most dangerous country in Europe. The police are corrupt, it has an area within the country called Transnistria which is Russian controlled, and I basically couldn't wait to get her home!

Your poor DD, she'll be home soon and you can breathe again 💐

Roussette · 07/03/2024 16:50

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 07/03/2024 16:46

I wouldn’t have let my 17 year old daughter travel alone whether she insisted on it or not.

She's not 17 now I don't think

EricInk · 07/03/2024 16:50

My friend had something similar happen to her in Mexico about 10 years ago

BresciaBike · 07/03/2024 16:53

I've solo travelled since your DD's age. On occassion it's been a bit hairy but usually it is fine. I still solo.

Normally there is plenty of info available around the sorts of incidents you'll come across in different areas. Beaches at night, especially in tourist areas, are a huge no-no. It isn't okay that it happened but she does need to read up a bit on stuff. The beach thing is very well known, not by every traveller I've met but by the vast majority.

Hopefully, her insurance will cover the lost money if she can get a police report - and she really might actually get one! She's unharmed and will soon be on the next adventure.

Vetoncall · 07/03/2024 17:08

That's awful, your poor DD. I have always been a solo traveller and have backpacked all over Central America, South America, Africa, SE Asia, Indonesia, Nepal, Canada, New Zealand and all over Europe by myself since I was 19 (I'm 41 now). I've been to Rio, Johannesburg, Nairobi, Mexico City and travelled through Honduras by bus amongst others and never had any major problems or bad experiences.

Even now I have been with DP for years I still take solo trips, it's just part of who I am. I have friends all over the world that I've met on my travels. You have to keep your wits about you, I never drink alcohol when travelling solo and would avoid beaches at night, but equally I've been lucky and have never been targeted as such. I hope your DD is OK and this doesn't put her off solo travel. I know my Mum always worried/worries about me, it's only natural, but the experiences I've had are truly priceless.

cardibach · 07/03/2024 17:11

That’s horrible. But you say she’s solo travelled a lot - has anything like it happened before? I’m guessing not…so you can answer the question of whether it’s typical yourself.

Hagbard · 07/03/2024 17:11

Police once confiscated my passport and I had to pay a bribe to get it back. And not the only hiccup on the trip. Some men pretending to be police grabbed me walking out of a compound where I'd bought some pot. They flashed a library card at me instead of a warrant card, but I paid them the small amount they were asking for anyway to get them off my back.

The experience didn't put me off travelling solo. Looking back now, I must have thought I was invincible. I am still a bit foolhardy though.

I'm glad your daughter is OK. Does she do much research on the areas she visits?

eyeslikebutterflies · 07/03/2024 17:33

I travelled when I was your daughter's age and into my 20s. Yes, it happens. Tbh it's a good life lesson, you learn the world isn't always fair, and you spend more time doing your research so that you don't end up in situations like this. Or, that when you do, you understand how to get out of them.

My most memorable was being at the Vietnam border with a group waiting to cross. Border officers wanted 10 dollars off us all - a lot back then - which I handed over pretty fast. They had guns, we were in the middle of nowhere, we needed to get out of there. But an American tourist was outraged and argued it was wrong and unfair. I took them to one side and whispered 'agent orange' in their ear - at which point they coughed up the ten dollar 'tax' and we were all allowed across the border.

I'd hate my kids to do the things I did but my god it changed my world view, helped me grow up and I saw things and met people I'll never forget. I'm glad she's OK and am sending a hand-hold.

ForTonightGodisaDJ · 07/03/2024 18:40

Surprisingly Mexico is often ranked as the most dangerous country in the world.

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:41

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 07/03/2024 16:46

I wouldn’t have let my 17 year old daughter travel alone whether she insisted on it or not.

Whoops - got age wrong. She was 18 and was an au pair. However, as soon as she had independence, then she started solo travelling. It has always made me uneasy.

OP posts:
Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:43

BresciaBike · 07/03/2024 16:53

I've solo travelled since your DD's age. On occassion it's been a bit hairy but usually it is fine. I still solo.

Normally there is plenty of info available around the sorts of incidents you'll come across in different areas. Beaches at night, especially in tourist areas, are a huge no-no. It isn't okay that it happened but she does need to read up a bit on stuff. The beach thing is very well known, not by every traveller I've met but by the vast majority.

Hopefully, her insurance will cover the lost money if she can get a police report - and she really might actually get one! She's unharmed and will soon be on the next adventure.

Thank you so much. She said that she was silly to go alone to the beach at night. Which countries do you travel to?

OP posts:
Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:44

ForTonightGodisaDJ · 07/03/2024 18:40

Surprisingly Mexico is often ranked as the most dangerous country in the world.

Oh dear!

OP posts:
Auntpodder · 07/03/2024 18:45

That sounds like an awful experience but your daughter handled it in the best way that was possible, if there's any consolation in that. It's awful to say this, but it could have turned even uglier. She's learned a huge lesson, the poor thing.

cestlavielife · 07/03/2024 18:48

She was sensible to be with two other people.
Carrying all that cash not so much
But its only cash she was not assaulted.

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:48

Hagbard · 07/03/2024 17:11

Police once confiscated my passport and I had to pay a bribe to get it back. And not the only hiccup on the trip. Some men pretending to be police grabbed me walking out of a compound where I'd bought some pot. They flashed a library card at me instead of a warrant card, but I paid them the small amount they were asking for anyway to get them off my back.

The experience didn't put me off travelling solo. Looking back now, I must have thought I was invincible. I am still a bit foolhardy though.

I'm glad your daughter is OK. Does she do much research on the areas she visits?

She claims that she does. However, she has several wines then does stupid things like go on an empty beach with two 'nice Italian men' to look at the sea and chat. There are quite a few scary stories. I suppose that they are learning experiences, but it makes me very uneasy. I do not really understand the rush that solo travelling gives her. I want her to go on holiday with her boyfriend, or friends ... somewhere safe.

OP posts:
Aydel · 07/03/2024 18:48

@Roussette lol at Moldova being the most dangerous country in Europe.

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:49

cestlavielife · 07/03/2024 18:48

She was sensible to be with two other people.
Carrying all that cash not so much
But its only cash she was not assaulted.

I agree.

OP posts:
Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:51

Vetoncall · 07/03/2024 17:08

That's awful, your poor DD. I have always been a solo traveller and have backpacked all over Central America, South America, Africa, SE Asia, Indonesia, Nepal, Canada, New Zealand and all over Europe by myself since I was 19 (I'm 41 now). I've been to Rio, Johannesburg, Nairobi, Mexico City and travelled through Honduras by bus amongst others and never had any major problems or bad experiences.

Even now I have been with DP for years I still take solo trips, it's just part of who I am. I have friends all over the world that I've met on my travels. You have to keep your wits about you, I never drink alcohol when travelling solo and would avoid beaches at night, but equally I've been lucky and have never been targeted as such. I hope your DD is OK and this doesn't put her off solo travel. I know my Mum always worried/worries about me, it's only natural, but the experiences I've had are truly priceless.

This is all useful information. I am going to show her this post.

OP posts:
ScierraDoll · 07/03/2024 18:51

Bloody he'll, I thought this had died out years ago. 50 years ago I was in morocco's a dealer would insist on coming to your hotel room to sell you some dope. Half an hour later police would arrive, take the drugs, take your money and eff off

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:53

cardibach · 07/03/2024 17:11

That’s horrible. But you say she’s solo travelled a lot - has anything like it happened before? I’m guessing not…so you can answer the question of whether it’s typical yourself.

No, this is the first time.

OP posts:
dizzydizzydizzy · 07/03/2024 18:57

I went backpacking solo in Mexico in 1993. Had a brilliant time. Much of Mexico is now ruled by the drugs cartels so is very dangerous.

minipie · 07/03/2024 19:00

This could have happened just as easily if she was travelling with friends or a boyfriend. The daft thing is going to a near empty beach at night rather than the solo travel per se.

I’m just surprised she tells you so much! I’ve had a few similar experiences - not corrupt cops but definitely the “nice Italian man” type thing and also outdoor activities with zero safety measures (one really hairy). I didn’t tell my mum till years later as she’d have had kittens. She worried enough as it was.

cardibach · 07/03/2024 19:04

Upsetmother12 · 07/03/2024 18:53

No, this is the first time.

Exactly. It’s horrible, but not typical.