Is anyone awake and free to chat?

[helpwtfdoido]

I’m a bit mortified and also a bit chuffed.

Got invited out on a tinder date/hook up … up until about six hours ago I was a virgin. At 32. Various reasons all of them complicated and not much fun.

I’m now not a virgin… not regretting what I’ve done - it’s probably the most fun I’ve had in a long time - but he’s snoring away and I’m wide awake feeling a bit wobbly.

I’m awake OP - how do you feel? What do you think is making you feel a bit wobbly? X

Wobbly is normal. You made yourself vulnerable in a physical way. Even without regret, it's a huge step.

Are you at home?

Virginity is primarily a cultural construct — inside your head, it means just what you let it mean. So if part of what's making you feeling wobbly is what it Means, remember that it only needs to mean whatever you find helpful.

No, at his - thanks, that might explain it re feeling vulnerable. I got up to wee an hour ago and thought omg, what have I just done!

Definitely a good idea to wee after anyway, otherwise you can get a uti.

Feel absolutely exhausted tbh! Thankfully it wasn’t painful or scary or anything I’d imagined it would be.

So do you think you'll see him again?

No need to be mortified; you are both adults and it sounds like you both enjoyed it! I can see it’s a big step at 32 but don’t feel guilty; you have every right to explore this whole new side of life and consensual, respectful sex with someone compatible is a lovely thing! Have a cup of tea and get some rest!

Yep was thinking the same about weeing! Always wee after sex op! No. 1 rule other than contraception 😁

Congratulations 🤭

Why a bit mortified?

Providing you were all on board with the whole thing, try not to overthink it... just go with it! And if he's snoring, either give him a kick and tell him to stop... or wake him up and have more fun 😉

New experience, out of your environment and probably got some adrenalin/disbelief kicking around as well.

How well do you know this person? Had you always planned to stay all night? Do you want to go home?

Like most things, sex gets better with practice! So if you enjoyed the first time that's a very excellent sign. Was he kind and generous? And (sorry) you did use a condom, didn't you? (I'm old enough to be your mother, so I'm allowed to ask!)

We did yeah, and I’ve got a coil as well.

I think adrenaline and disbelief is right, I was a bit shivery earlier.

Re enjoying he was good, spent more time on other things than ‘proper’ sex iyswim. Which made it better I think. Very generous and made me feel so good about myself ie I’ve always seen myself as fat and ugly and he told me I was beautiful. No-one’s ever treated me like that before, not in a sex way anyway!

yes we’ll see each other again, I hope so anyway! I had semi planned on staying over but also wasn’t sure I’d go through with it.

Is it normal to have a wee bit of bleeding after? Not heavy but I’ve had a bit of spotting on and off, still spotting a little tonight. No pain or anything, and I wasn’t sore during but we did keep going for quite a long time and then again in the morning.

Yes totally normal x