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If you were a man, would you find you attractive?

119 replies

Bigearringsbigsmile · 14/02/2024 18:38

I'm just getting ready for my valentine's date tonight and looking at myself and thinking " Gordon Bennett, it's a good job he loves you"
I wouldn't fancy me I don't think. Even with all the effort I've made tonight.

What about you?

OP posts:
ChanelNo19EDT · 14/02/2024 23:26

TeabySea · 14/02/2024 18:47

Like the PP, I'm not my type. Far too normal on the surface and far too weird deep down.

Ha ha I relate. "Totally normal but not atvall average" I jused to say about myself, chirpily. Then at some point I thought if I switch it around it's probably closer to the truth. 😲

AllTheChaos · 14/02/2024 23:27

OceanicBoundlessness · 14/02/2024 23:20

I would have thought there would be differences in what women attracted to women would find attractive and what a man would...

Then obviously yet more difference in what a straight woman finds objectively attractive in another woman.

I think it was more that we’d all bought into a really odd, media-centric idea of what straight men would find attractive. So, given we are talking 20+ years ago, super skinny but massive boobs for instance, when actually most men really don’t care much about either of these things. Whereas when we were considering what another woman might like, we didn’t have all those ridiculous stereotypes getting in the way of what we actually knew about them IYSWIM? I still don’t really know what men find attractive!

EveSix · 14/02/2024 23:36

Absolutely! I'm definitely my type, whether I was a man looking at myself, or whether I was me looking at myself as a female lover.
I tick all my boxes. I'm not the siren I once was, but I think I've got a kind of earthy, low-slung, funny comfiness about me that I find attractive in others.

KohlaParasaurus · 14/02/2024 23:38

If male me was my own age or older, almost certainly.

PutItInTheFuckitBucketAndGetOnWithYourDay · 14/02/2024 23:41

I got chatted up last week at the pub quiz
New guy on our team
My 2 female friends are tall slim blondes, with a naturally 'polished' look and there was me, a little dumpy brunette with large rimmed glasses, an oversized mans shirt, jeggings and 10 hole flowered Dr Martens 🤣
So...I'd probably fancy me!

OverdramaticAndTrue · 14/02/2024 23:51

Yes, I’ve always been happy with how I look. I might be a bit too guarded and sarcastic at times though.

DoIhavegreeneyes · 14/02/2024 23:51

To misquote Shania: "Do I impress me much?"

I am tall

Containerhome · 14/02/2024 23:54

Depends where I am on my cycle!

Answering the questions today.... no!

Ask me again in 2 weeks, I would probably say yes!

coffeetofunction · 15/02/2024 00:01

There are many women I think I'd like to look like, long straight hair, pert breast, peachy bum, muscles, eye lashes, long nails but then make no effort to because I feel (for me and this is not a judgement) it's becoming a generic look.... I would however kill to look like Annie Mac and to be honest I have the hair and similar style but I don't know if that's how I'd fancy as a man. I do think I look ok though, my partner fancies me, I can turn heads occasionally, I'm not embarrassed for my kids and I've got a killer personality 😂

Beamur · 15/02/2024 00:08

Totally. I'm not perfect but I'm pretty great.

thishouseisashittip · 15/02/2024 00:15

Absolutely not, Don't think anyone would. I'm not remotely good looking/pretty. Never have been 😔. Not desperately ugly (well I feel like I am but being honest with myself, if I was someone else looking at me I would say you are fine iyswim) just plain I guess, nothing special looking in any way. Used to be slim before the kids, not now. Never really had any male attention other than my husband. (been with the same person for 30 years, since I was a teenager). Friends at work seem to mostly enjoy my company so that's something.

Algorhythum · 15/02/2024 00:18

Yes I would. Its taken half a decade to like myself but I think I’m decent looking and good company.

Snuggleyou · 15/02/2024 00:55

Don’t know anymore. For any compliment telling me I’m pretty there can be criticisms in the same day. I think that’s done a number on my self esteem so I just believe the worst now, especially in middle age were compliments get fewer.

Babla · 15/02/2024 01:21

Ding dong!

FabFebHalfTerm · 15/02/2024 01:23

Hereforthebunfights · 14/02/2024 18:59

This is a massively heteronormative question.

And??

JMSA · 15/02/2024 01:26

I think so. Especially if I lost some weight Blush
I need the opposite of me though, as I'm too laidback.

Hippobot · 15/02/2024 01:36

Not a chance. I'm absolutely bogging to look at.

Garlickit · 15/02/2024 02:11

If I were a man, I'd be a gay man 😁 so, no!

Also no in the way you meant the question. I think I can be quite interesting & entertaining, mind you.

Oblomov23 · 15/02/2024 02:30

Not really. I scrub up ok, I can put on a dress and a bit of lippy and I look ok. But pretty, I have never been. Attractive, beautiful, stunning, certainly not. I wouldn't fancy me.

ComtesseDeSpair · 15/02/2024 02:33

Hereforthebunfights · 14/02/2024 18:59

This is a massively heteronormative question.

This is an interesting point. All of the men and most of the women I know either have already or would like to sleep with me. So to the OP’s question, yes. I know a lot of people are attracted to me. I don’t get coy about it: I work out a lot and have a great body, I don’t put all that fucking effort in just for the good of my health.

Men are pretty easy. You just have to be fairly attractive to get their interest. And I’m married to a man. But I can still pick up women who would usually think of themselves as straight in bars and nightclubs with ease. There’s (apparently) something incredibly charming about me, which I haven’t ever quite been able to work out, but which women particularly are attracted to.

Actually, giving it some thought, I can guess more or less exactly what it is: when I meet a woman who I think is interesting, beautiful, witty, talented, sexy and clever, I really want to get to know her better and thus I show her interest on that level. A lot of women aren’t used to anyone showing them genuine interest and appreciation, rather than just trying to get into their pants. When I get a woman’s phone number, I message her the next afternoon, I arrange a date, I sort the logistics, I keep in touch, I remind her how much I’m looking forward to it. We at least go the theatre and for dinner before we talk about sex. Too many women I guess are used to being messed around by men who don’t want to do any of that.

JustCantFindMyMind · 15/02/2024 04:18

Evidence suggests not.

I get chatted up by strangers a reasonable amount but men in pubs on a Saturday night aren't very discerning I find...

I don't think I'm too bad. In fact, I think I'm OK.

But, if I look at myself objectively, every part of me is the opposite of what is considered attractive. Or what people claim to find attractive.

I've got a partner and I don't believe he finds me attractive either.

So no.

Josette77 · 15/02/2024 04:31

I think I'm sexy. Men seem to find me attractive.

That I said I would happily talk to myself for about an hour and then find myself totally exhausting.

I have ADHD and OCD. I'm stuck with myself not voluntarily.

SisterAgatha · 15/02/2024 07:48

ComtesseDeSpair · 15/02/2024 02:33

This is an interesting point. All of the men and most of the women I know either have already or would like to sleep with me. So to the OP’s question, yes. I know a lot of people are attracted to me. I don’t get coy about it: I work out a lot and have a great body, I don’t put all that fucking effort in just for the good of my health.

Men are pretty easy. You just have to be fairly attractive to get their interest. And I’m married to a man. But I can still pick up women who would usually think of themselves as straight in bars and nightclubs with ease. There’s (apparently) something incredibly charming about me, which I haven’t ever quite been able to work out, but which women particularly are attracted to.

Actually, giving it some thought, I can guess more or less exactly what it is: when I meet a woman who I think is interesting, beautiful, witty, talented, sexy and clever, I really want to get to know her better and thus I show her interest on that level. A lot of women aren’t used to anyone showing them genuine interest and appreciation, rather than just trying to get into their pants. When I get a woman’s phone number, I message her the next afternoon, I arrange a date, I sort the logistics, I keep in touch, I remind her how much I’m looking forward to it. We at least go the theatre and for dinner before we talk about sex. Too many women I guess are used to being messed around by men who don’t want to do any of that.

Edited

I have been pursued by a woman in this way, and I agree. It’s lovely. Men (imo) have a lot to learn in this respect.

ThreeRingCircus · 15/02/2024 07:57

I'm pretty average looking and I'm overweight BUT I have a good sense of humour, like having a laugh and I'm kind. So I'd say yes, I would. I'd fancy the male version of me. Not at first sight but once I got to know them 😁.

piscofrisco · 15/02/2024 07:59

No not any more :( I would have few years ago but since I turned maybe 42 I've gone downhill pretty fast.