We don't do too bad, I might be light on veg some days, but then some days will be completely veggie, so over a week it averages out to at least 5-6 a day.
We do eat fish 2-3 times a week, a mixture of white and oily, but I don't really keep count of how many of each it is.
Water I am very poor on, usually only one glass a day, but I do drink decaf tea in huge quantities. I very rarely drink alcohol at all, and when I do it will only be one unit. DH has a bit more, not more than a couple a week though.
Processed meat is quite bad, we have bacon for breakfast about once a week and ham sandwiches at least once a week, and in pasta sauce or omelettes, we will probably have sausages as well. So that might be double the recommended amount.
It's just so affordable and tasty though, a couple of rashers of bacon are so flavoursome they can make a nice dinner out of otherwise very bland ingredients. And the veggie alternatives are very expensive, not as nice and just as highly processed, so there is no point in my mind of swapping them out for veggie pretend bacon or sausage.
Other red meat we'd have once a week or so, and small portions extended with veg, lentils and beans in ragus and stews. This is one way being poor is actually healthier!