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Original poster

DS left his phone (bus ticket) at home. What would you do?

98 replies

HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:01

Just had a message from his TA to say he left his phone at home, it has his bus ticket on it. I'm not sure what she is expecting me to do:
He can walk home (25 mins)

Take the bus and risk getting fined - as he has a pass and is a child this won't be the full amount if he goes to their offices in town within 5 days and presents his pass. We told him at the beginning of the school year we wouldn't pay fines for forgetting ticket, it would be his responsibility to go to the ticket office and pay the £5.

I could get the bus into town and wait 20 minutes to accompany him back BUT DD (in primary) would be stuck in the garden for at least 20 minutes until I get back as she doesn't have a key with her.

Should I just say thanks or ask the TA if I can speak to him to explain his options? (Has ASD and never forgotten before, so a new scenario for him!)

OP posts:
MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 23/01/2024 08:04

If this is the first time I would get him and leave a note for dd with the key next door if you have neighbours in. I would also tell him you will never come again-this was a learn your lesson moment. If he was NT I would leave him but with ASD I’d probably help.

Sirzy · 23/01/2024 08:06

Is there no way you can get it to him during the day?

you say his TA so if his needs are such that he needs specific TA support then that does change the situation massively!

Frozenasarock · 23/01/2024 08:06

If he knows the way and is safe to do so I’d just ask the TA to tell him to walk home - 25 minutes is not far. I certainly wouldn’t leave my primary aged daughter locked out for twenty minutes so my son didn’t have to walk - it was his mistake!

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PianPianPiano · 23/01/2024 08:07

I would ask the TA to speak to him and then give him the option of walking home or taking the bus and paying the fine. A 25 minute walk isn't long, as long as he knows where to go?

Violetparis · 23/01/2024 08:07

How old is he ?

Ragwort · 23/01/2024 08:07

Agree with others in that it depends what support he actually needs, if he is sensible enough to walk safely home from school then 25 minutes isn't that far ... if you are confident he can do it on his own.

Original poster
HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:08

Or should he go straight to the bus driver and say he forgot his pass but I'll meet him at the bus stop here with it? Would they let him do that do you think?

OP posts:
Decafflatteplease · 23/01/2024 08:10

Is there any way you can pick up your DD earlier and take her with you to get DS?

This won't help now but it's something I worry about with my (albeit NT) teens either losing their phone or forgetting it so now I make sure they have "emergency" bus money in the zipped inside pocket of the blazer just in case

Also how did he get to school without his ticket this morning?

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 23/01/2024 08:10

Depends on his age and his specific difficulties with the ASD.

A 25 min walk is nothing and I wouldn't hesitate to suggest this if he was NT but maybe he would struggle with this?

StoorieHoose · 23/01/2024 08:10

is it a school provided bus or a service bus? can't he pay for a ticket on board?

catelynjane · 23/01/2024 08:11

How old is he? Does he have specific needs if the TA is contacting you about this?

Original poster
HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:13

He doesn't carry cash (massive difficulties with maths/understanding money) a he uses his phone to pay if he needs to. He took the bus this morning.

OP posts:
Mrsjayy · 23/01/2024 08:15

how did he get to school did he walk the 25 minutes I mean of course you can't let him walk to town then home or whatever combination of that scenario. I would either go to school with his phone or just tell him to get the bus he can "pay off" any fine I'm sure you can think of a punishment.

theduchessofspork · 23/01/2024 08:15

It sounds like you are comfortable with him walking so let him walk.

I wouldn’t complicate it with suggesting he get on the bus and explain the situation to the driver if yoj think he can’t handle that - but if he can then fine

catelynjane · 23/01/2024 08:15

HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:13

He doesn't carry cash (massive difficulties with maths/understanding money) a he uses his phone to pay if he needs to. He took the bus this morning.

How did he pay for it without his phone?

Original poster
HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:19

@catelynjane ?
he has a bus pass and thought he had it with him so he just got on the bus like any other day.

OP posts:
Mummysatthebodyshop · 23/01/2024 08:20

Providing he won't be in any danger, let him feel the consequences and walk/ bus and fine. These boys otherwise grow into men who think they don't have to think because a woman will save the day. (Extreme jump but relevant)

ThatBoyFromEastTennessee · 23/01/2024 08:20

I’d find a way to help my child. He hasn’t done it on purpose, he hasn’t forgotten before, everyone makes mistakes and it’s nice to help your kids. You can talk to him about the importance of double checking he has everything once it’s sorted.

Original poster
HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:20

I wouldn’t complicate it with suggesting he get on the bus and explain the situation to the driver if yoj think he can’t handle that
ok, as I'm not sure he would manage that.

OP posts:
BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 23/01/2024 08:27

If it's anything like our buses then the driver doesn't care at home time. Plus same drivers most of the time and they end up recognising the children and know who have the passes. I would just get the bus, the risk of a fine is miniscule and its not an expensive fine either.

Remmy123 · 23/01/2024 08:28

If you can't drop it in he can tell the his driver they are hardly going to fine a school child

crumblingschools · 23/01/2024 08:29

How did he cope without his pass this morning?

Original poster
HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:31

How did he cope without his pass this morning?
They obviously didn't check tickets this morning so it wasn't a problem!

OP posts:
ThatBoyFromEastTennessee · 23/01/2024 08:31

Providing he won't be in any danger, let him feel the consequences and walk/ bus and fine. These boys otherwise grow into men who think they don't have to think because a woman will save the day. (Extreme jump but relevant)

It is an extreme jump. There were 2 occasions my son forgot something at secondary school, once was a book in year 8 and once his football boots in year 11. His dad took them to him, our son was grateful and he is now a fully functioning and well organised adult, along with knowing he has parents who will help him out. He may still forget something one day though because he’s a human, not a robot. Even his female teachers forgot a set of books sometimes. Shocker!

My daughter has forgot a book once so far, back in year 9. Again, we took it to her and she was very grateful. She is autistic and is extremely organised, but again, she isn’t perfect.

If it’s not a habit of forgetting things through laziness, it won’t really teach them anything, other than mum and dad haven’t got their back.

sashh · 23/01/2024 08:31

HowToTeach · 23/01/2024 08:08

Or should he go straight to the bus driver and say he forgot his pass but I'll meet him at the bus stop here with it? Would they let him do that do you think?

Phone the bus company and ask.

Mention the ASD and ask for a 'reasonable adjustment'

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