bit woo- but have you ever met anyone you have felt scared of for no reason?

[crochetmonkey74]

I'm fascinated by stories like this- when you meet someone and they don't necessarily do anything - more that you just feel scared- intuition etc

I'm nearly 50 and it's happened once very strongly (was justified I later came to find out) and once not as strongly - so it's not a regular occurrence, but stories like this really interest me

I am late 50's, although I never physically met him, as I child I hated to watch Jimmy Saville on the TV, I found him scary and creepy. How right I was.

Yes the window cleaner who took over our window cleaners round. He only cleaned my ex's windows once and knocked to be paid. He made my flesh crawl literally. About a week later there was a double murder in our town. It was the window cleaner he had been stalking a woman who didn't want to be in a relationship with him and he wouldn't take no for an answer.

The woman had been on a night out with a boyfriend. He was outside waiting for her to return home. So when he saw her with another man he got jealous and killed them both. It's just lucky that her little girl had stayed at her babysitter's house that night. The babysitter would usually have stayed at her's with her. The little girl went to live with family after what happened and they moved away with her. Which is understandable after what happened. But the police said if they had been there he most likely would have killed those as well.

@RhodaPenmark are you aware that your posts are being read by countless MNers who have serious mental health diagnoses (including the dreaded schizophrenia)? These are people who already face stigma and bigotry in real life. They are vastly more likely to be the victims of crime than the perpetrators - and this is partly due to the proliferation of attitudes like yours that demonise and other them.

@Rah88

Are you sure you thought the woman was Rose West?
The Wests live in Gloucester , so I doubt you would have come across her on a train in London to East Anglia and then picked up from there by her husband.

They were well known to pick up young women from bus stops in their home town or surrounding places like Cheltenham.

Um are you denying that people (particularly men) with serious mental illness can be dangerous?

Priti Patel and Suella Bravermann- how can two supposedly clever people be that callous, devious and dangerous.
Partner worked with a hospital consultant imprisoned for depraved sex abuse images. Apparently he didn't give off any bad vibes, and could crack a funny joke.

I was at the Foyles at the South Bank Centre when DD was 7 ish, and there was a man in the children's book section that just made my blood run cold. He looked very normal, like a kindly uncle, and I had no rational reason for feeling like that, but I just did.
We spent most weekends there for years, so I wasn't freaked out by being in central London or anything like that, and I don't tend to fear people, but he gave me the absolute heebie-jeebies.

As a child my hand brushed his at a charity marathon in Leeds I think, don't like to think of that now but nothing untoward happened.

I was a newly qualified teacher assigned to a Year 11 class. There was one lad in there that frankly terrified me. He had the coldest eyes I'd ever seen and in the 9 months I taught him never showed either a shred of humour or empathy.

He's in prison for a heinously violent assault now.

I went to a small village primary school. Sometimes you spent 2 years with the same teacher. This happened to my 'year group' (maybe 15 of us).

I hated this man.
Even then I knew his behaviour was inappropriate but I couldn't articulate it in a way adults would accept.
He had obvious favourites, he picked on some kids just because he didn't like them.
ALL his favourites were boys and of them one was absolute favourite.
I wouldn't be surprised if any of those favourites made accusations against him and would 100 % believe them.

Re the person who said Ricky Gervais-Snap!

This absolutely encapsulates my feelings about celebrities.

Of those that I have seen or been in contact with, few have struck me as being nice people underneath.

Not sure if someone has already mentioned this but this thread reminded me of the book The Gift of Fear. Keep meaning to get it from the library.

Omfg

You poor thing. Hope you are safe and being supported now sending hugs

I travel across town to meetings by taxi several times a year, so I'm used to getting into taxis alone and I thought nothing of it. Except for one occasion last year when I suddenly started to feel afraid. The taxi driver seemed like a normal (and quite young) guy. He hadn't said anything weird, in fact he only spoke to confirm where I was going. But once the taxi set off and he locked all the doors, as they usually do, I really wanted to scream let me out. I was honestly rigid with fear the whole journey and inwardly shaken when we arrived. It was horrible.

It's so strange. I have no idea what came over me but unfortunately it's left me not wanting to get into taxis alone, although I still do because I have to.

While out on a walk alone I walked past a young guy who was fishing on the river in Oxford. I had walked far enough out away from the town that there were very few people around. The guy gave me the creeps straight away and I just knew he had clocked me. But I thought, oh well, he's fishing, he has all his kit there. He won't bother me. Cue a couple minutes later and it was blatantly obvious he was now following me. I had the most sick feeling, like I knew I was in big trouble here. I stopped for a minute to pretend to look at the view, and he passed me then stopped too. Then I turned around and walked back in the direction I'd come from as fast as my legs would carry me, with him following. I knew there were more people the further I got back toward town, and I've never been so pleased in my life to finally start coming across families out on walks. Nothing bad happened to me thank goodness but I absolutely know in my gut that if I'd carried on walking that day that guy was intent on doing something bad.

I think that humans respond to many more cues than just those we are aware of. Many of our hormones are able.to affect those around us. So if you meet and have to spend time with someone with particularly high levels of cortisol, then you in turn are likely to have raised cortisol l cells and thus feel anxious. It works in a similar way to oestrogen causing women's periods to sync when they live or work in close proximity.

As for Jimmy Carr etc, someone up thread mentioned Botox. Some studies suggest that using Botox reduces empathy, not just the ability to express empathy ..but empathy itself. Our ability to read empathy in another's face is absolutely key in relationship building.

I’m fairly sure Gavin de Becker didn’t intend his ‘universal code of violence’ to justify retrofitting stuff like a teacher’s attitude towards a child who would grow up to commit a violent act, or a sense that there’s ’something off’ about a celebrity you’ve only seen on tv.

Excuse the typos. The thing about cortisol is interesting because it applies even when the person with high cortisol levels is not behaving or acting as if they do. So they can appear warm, friendly, calm but will still be emitting high cortisol. Which may explain why some people give off a vibe.

This is so bizarre.

Reading this thread, prompted someone to instantly come to my mind. A man I used to go to school with. I was at school with him for 5 years, and we were both the same age (11-16) but even at that young age, there was something really…off about him.

I luckily only shared a few classes with him, due to being in the same tutor group. Any time we were in the same classroom, I would purposely aim to sit as far away from him as possible. He just…really set me on edge. I think I only had 2 or 3 direct conversations with him in those 5 years, and they were all unpleasant, and have stayed with me. He was always pretty thuggish, even as a teenager, and he just set my teeth on edge.

Havent seen or heard anything from him in 15 years, shockingly I don’t have him on social media. After reading this thread, decided to Google his name.

First search result that came up from Googling his name - convicted for careless driving for killing someone by hitting them with his car. Read the article, he has 7 other convictions. I’m actually surprised that careless driving resulting in killing someone with his car is the worst thing he’s done!

So funny, hadn’t thought about him for years until this thread. One Google search, and everything I’d felt about him came right back.

David Williams (or Walliams to use his stupid stage name) has already done enough nasty/inappropriate stuff to already be in the confirmed category. Surprises me how his books (ghost authored or not) are given such a prominent position in book stores, and that’s before even considering that it’s poundshop Roald Dahl stuff with nasty stereotypes and undercurrents.

Jimmy Carr gives me the creeps

I have a couple - when I was about 8 or 9 I went to stay with a family who my parents were friends with, they had similar aged children and I met them lots of times, was very happy to go. I vividly remember being alone with the dad in the living room for a minute or two, he smiled in a leery way and said something I don't recall. My hair stood up on my neck, I felt fear wash over me physically. Even now I can remember the sensation. Luckily nothing happened and I don't think I even told my parents about it.

Another time my partner and I went to lunch with a group of his childhood friends. One of them made me feel so uncomfortable, his eyes were like a sharks just dead and cold. I could barely get a word out to him I was so intimidated. When I mentioned this to my partner he told me this particular friend was renowned for acts of extreme violence, had been in prison many times and was in his words a complete psychopath ( he hadn't known he would be there at the lunch! )
This man later tried to burn his exs house down while her, her parents and children were inside. He killed himself while in prison for that.

On the other hand, I found out a few years ago a boy I knew when I was younger killed his mum! Never once had a bad feeling about him though

The first one was the pastor at church. Gave me the creeps, and I remember hiding my shoes on my birthday so I wouldn't have to stand up at the front with him. I can't remember what happened but we stopped going to that church shortly after that. Turns out he was "interfering with little boys" as it was called during the 80s.

The next ones were mild in comparison. I worked in retail for nearly a decade and almost every manager or member of staff who was mean to me/tried to bully me ended up being caught stealing money/goods/fiddling their timesheet. They were nice to nearly everyone else. I think it's because they knew I had a sixth sense about them and wanted to keep me out of their way.

I've had a few more sixth senses since then, and they've left their employment under a cloud, but I'm not sure what.

I think it's partly pattern recognition and partly because you only remember the few times you were spot on, and not the thousands of times you weren't.