Not sure if I should have children or not?

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Evening all,

I'm aware time is ticking away, I'm 35, and if we are going to try we need to start soon.

To be honest life is great, it's never been better and that's the problem. Work is going well, I wake up at 9am during the week and 10-11am at the weekend.

We go out all the time, go to the gym, active holidays, do what we want when we want, our house is very tidy and takes very little work to keep clean and we don't have any money worries.

I always thought I'd have children, my DM had my brother when I was 8 and I helped out a fair amount. I know it seems bizarre to say but part of me feels like I've already done it.

It's a big and life changing decision, once it's done life will never ever go back to how it was. That's scary for me as like I said, life has never been better.

Part of me is wishing I'd have done it at 18 and they'd be independent now.

Any words of wisdom?

@HarpyRampant sounds like a keeper!

We can only tell you our experiences. No one can tell you if you should have children or not.

I was similar to you in that I wasn’t sure if I wanted kids until in my 30s, had an accident got pregnant but I ended up loosing it which I was surprisingly devastated about. Cue 2 years later of trying and then desperately wanting a baby I found I needed ivf to conceive. I didn’t realise that woman can have lots of trouble conceiving 10-15 years before menopause (that can be in 30s for lots of people). Wish I knew this information sooner - That’s my only proper advice!

Anyway I adore my children and love my life the way things are now despite having an absolution awesome time pre children. That’s just my story, yours is different and life with and without children can be brilliant x

@Paisley19 hope you’re ok. It can be a shock to the system. 8 weeks baby is so tiny and new. Please let your gp or health visitor know how you are feeling about your situation with your little one . Sending love - things will improve

If you're happy now and actually need to give this thought then I wouldn't do it. Not if you don't have a yearning for children.

Enjoy your life, Enjoy your job, enjoy your free time and the holidays.

We were married for 4 years before trying to conceive. I remember people asking when we were having chn and then when we did, I remember a neighbour saying “ That’s it, your life will never be the same again!” in quite a foreboding tone. It was quite unsettling but she was right. 😂