If you’re neurodivergent, can you pick up on when others around you are?

[Naaarna]

Just interested. I feel as if I can. It’s made me wonder if others around me who I haven’t disclosed to can see it very obviously in me Apparently though neurodivergent people are more likely to be friends, partners, etc with other ND folk because they just understand each other well.

I can't spot it in others, but the only people I really feel mutually understanding with are ND.

I find myself without realising it preferring ND people. I often later find out they are ND. I like my work colleagues and it turns out that an unusually large number of them are ND.

I am ASD & ADHD, I can’t tell if other people are straight away but I always wondered why I select one person out of every situation I was in and made friends with them but couldn’t gel with anybody else.
as I’ve got older I’ve realised that all of my friends are neurodivergent and we’ve obviously just gravitated towards each other. Hence why I don’t gel with everyone else in the group

DH and I have recognised that we are both probably neurodiverse and our three sons are officially diagnosed with ASD, ADHD or both! I love DH too bits but in darker moments when the boys were younger I did sometimes think if I'd married someone else maybe I'd have NT kids and have an easier parenting experience/ family life... But then I realised that, with hindsight, ALL the men I've been attracted to IRL were probably neurodiverse and I was fated to have " neurospicy" kids and actually I've done a fairly good job of it.
It's just easier to get that deeper connection with people on the same wavelength.

I'm NT but work helping ND people so notice it instantly, many times way before someone even speaks. Body language, walk, mannerisms, facial features can give it away.

Yes, definitely. My friends are ND too and I'm struggling to relate to the one NT woman in our friendship group.

My DC are ND and so are their friends. I can spot ND children and adults.

100%.

I work in HR. Have a 100% success rate.

Reported you for this utter nonsense.

Autism and ADHD are not personality types.

Weirdly no my kids are nd and have no nd friends

I used to work in schools and nurseries, would often be able to spot ND children. Was diagnosed ADHD last year. One child ASD, other likely ADHD. The more I've learned the more I can spot it. Plus most of my cirrcle of friends are most probably ND. I have NT friends and whilst I'm close and they love me, they are the ones that are most likely to (lovingly) call me weird.

I have ADHD and Autism. I love being around others with ADHD. My daughter is also ADHD and Autistic and all the friends she made at school and college were all ND even befpre they knew this about each other. I just find it so refreshing to be around others with ND.

Looking back at our university friendship group, most were neurodivergent in one way or another.

For want of a better way to put it, it’s like a gaydar but for ND people.

we all gravitate together.

I love this meme

Yes! My DH and I call it neuro-dar. I can also predict with some accuracy whether a poster on MN is autistic based on writing style, rather than content - and feel vindicated when it comes out in a drip feed, or if another poster spots it too (and is brave enough to say it, knowing they’ll be pounced on by the ‘Oh FGS not everyone is autistic!’ brigade)

Yes, definitely. I can usually spot ND people on tv too.

It's not 100% but I think my sperg radar is pretty good.

I’m NT but my DP & DD are autistic. I’ve also realised that some of my female friends are likely to be autistic. I seem to be drawn to neurodiverse people generally. I was supporting a student who was ND & he was saying how he loves ND people, they are so interesting & creative. By contrast he can’t get on with most NT people.

It turns out that most people I like are ND or have ND traits. DH has no diagnosis and had much more conventional social skills than most of his friends at university, but it wouldn't surprise me in the least if he were autistic. Everyone I know is a geeky weirdo and our friendship group runs on ND social rules so everyone is comfortable with ND ways even if they are NT. I can only only think of a very few who are clearly NT, though.

I'm definitely attracted to ND people. I would have finished this post sooner but I spent way too long laughing at the wolf meme posted above and then searching work memes but featuring cats in. I nearly burnt the kids pizza.

I think I can pick it up in others. Most of my family are ND. My DH very likely is.

My best friend and I joke all the time we sensed each others autism before we properly spoke!

I work in a very ‘nerdy’ STEM industry and it’s actually more unusual when work employ someone NT! The ‘tism is strong within our office

I can with kids.
Eg I see a kid at the park by themself uninterested in other kids.
Kids obsessed with roblox or minecraft etc
Sometimes hypermobile and late walkers
The kid who obssessed with opening and shutting the gate at the children centre
Ones who wouldnt sit for the story
Hitting scratching etc over 4yo
Pulling down trousers for a wee in playground at school
Struggling with group swim lessons/always told off
Either very placid baby or never sleeps so not in the norm. In fact several parents seem to have had next dc very quickly possibly as child 1 so easygoing.

I expect too teen parents to be more likely adhd.
So watching teen mom with all the teens arguing and having kids by multiple dads (impulsive)

Also to the extent i really cant see one dc who has been diagnosed - they are truly popular no unusual behaviour. Copes with age expected (whereas asd kids i know would struggle getting to school alone)

Asd can look like shyness.

Throwing up easily seems a factor for some.

My eldest was only friends with one kid -ND.
Dc2 seems to mask but is exhausted. However there is at least 2 of her friends who have some traits.

One kid never wants to go out just wants to play online (7)
The girl is quite bossy bright but had some huge tantrums in reception.
Maybe a boy who really dislikes football.

Me too. Im adhd and literally cannot deal with autistic people at all and find them unbelievably difficult to be around. My adhd symptoms really flare up when trying.