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Original poster

How often do you speak to your mum / adult children?

105 replies

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 31/12/2023 10:11

Inspired another thread but I didn’t want to derail.

How often do you chat to your mum and/ or adult children?

I speak to my mum about once a week and my adult DD FaceTime once a week and a couple of WhatsApp’s during the week, but only if there is something to say. I have a teenage DS at home and I’m lucky to get a couple of sentences out of him a day when face to face, so goodness knows how much communication we will have once he goes to uni.

Those of you who speak every day/ multiple times a day - what do you talk about? If you can’t get hold of them does it make you feel panicked and isn’t that suffocating? Sorry, one more question - if you do chat to your mum or siblings multiple times a day how do you find time to get anything done?

OP posts:
Yuckyyuckyuckity · 31/12/2023 10:40

WhatsApp pretty much every day, speak 1-2 times a week. Although this has definitely been since my LO was born, much of the conversation is about her. Before that it was still a call around once a week and WhatsApp a couple of times a week. Usually chat about family, what's happening, sometimes work, upcoming events etc.

Motheranddaughtertotwo · 31/12/2023 10:42

I speak to my mum around twice a day. About anything really; what she has planned for the day, how she’s feeling, if she needs any help. It’s normally when I’m in the car or cooking.
My adult DD that lives at uni, multiple times a day because she suffers with mental health issues and often needs to be “talked down” or just heard. We also have a family group chat that is really active. We’re all really close and enjoy spending time together.

DelurkingAJ · 31/12/2023 10:44

WhatsApp most days between me, DM and DSis. Ring DM about once every 10 days. Ring DSis a few times a year (we’ve never had a chatting relationship but would ring her without question if I were upset and couldn’t get hold of DH or DM).

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Allthingsdecember · 31/12/2023 10:44

I speak to my mum everyday, my sister most days, and my dad once every couple of weeks (no backstory, he’s just less chatty).

It’s not a chore though, we’re just close and like a natter.

BooksAndHooks · 31/12/2023 10:45

See each other or speak every day. WhatsApp throughout day with parents and siblings.

Carwashandthemoog · 31/12/2023 10:48

My parents are elderly (mum has Alzheimer’s) and live just around the corner. I physically see them around 4/5 times a week and speak to my dad on the phone regularly to check in on them. Before mum was poorly I’d still see them several times a week.
DS18 and DD15 live at home and these days I get minimal conversations from them. I do hope they call their mum once in a while when they leave home though.

DeniseLucy · 31/12/2023 10:53

when my mum was here I’d speak to her a few times a week at least, she would then keep my dad updated.

my adult kids (in their 30s) a day rarely goes by without us messaging about something or other, sending photos and links to stuff for each other to read also my lovely DIL also messages both my husband and I regularly. I love the contact we have.

A long phone call with one of them every other week ish as they live abroad.

StampOnTheGround · 31/12/2023 10:57

We exchange messages daily - sometimes once or twice, others multiple times.

Beezknees · 31/12/2023 11:05

Speak to my mum every day or every couple of days via whataspp, just chatting about what we've been up to or sending memes, arranging to meet up, things like that.

Mo819 · 31/12/2023 11:06

I lost my mum last year but speak to my dad daily sometime 2-3 times a day. I speak to one brother most days and my other siblings at least weekly.

WashItTomorrow · 31/12/2023 11:08

I speak to my elderly parents every couple of days via WhatsApp. Often it’s just five minutes, sometimes longer. I speak to my adult DC every day - they still live at home. I speak to my sibling at least weekly via WhatsApp.

NeedWineNow · 31/12/2023 11:09

My mum is 87, lives on her own. Whilst mentally she's fine, she is ageing physically fairly rapidly and has had a couple of falls. I phone her every day just to check in and make sure she's ok. Some days it's a quick call, but others we chat for a bit longer. She knows our friends so asks after them for example, and we just chat. Funny I can chat to her longer on the phone than when I see her face to face.

MarleyandMarleyWoooo · 31/12/2023 11:10

I suppose I speak to my mum every day but it’s not a call so not a direct conversation, we have a group chat between my sisters, my mum and I, and that just kind of rumbles on continuously. We send funny/interesting (debatable sometimes!) stories about our day, photos of the kids etc. It only takes a matter of seconds to reply on the chat, and there’s no obligation to send essays or even to read every message tbh. If we’re busy elsewhere or just cba, that’s fine too.
Mum then rings me perhaps once a week or so for a proper chat if we’ve not seen each other for a bit.

ghlily · 31/12/2023 11:12

Talk to my mum everyday, sometimes multiple times. We talk about our day, current events, gossip etc. I don’t know what I’d do without her, she’s one of my best friends.

CatsMother66 · 31/12/2023 12:14

I’m with my 90year old Mum two or three times a week but will still ring every night (and sometimes in the day) to say goodnight and to check on her day. I’ve done this for the past ten years since Dad died.
She doesn’t go out and usually I’m the only person she has spoken to. There is definitely an art to it and I quickly learnt that as I have to lead the conversation I need to embellish my narrative of my day to make it rich and happy.
Our calls are usually only about 10 minutes. I have been panicked many times if she hasn’t answered the phone at our usual time and a few times I’ve dressed and jumped in the car to make my way over only to have her answer and say she was dozing in the chair.

RampantIvy · 31/12/2023 12:20

DD rings me most days when she is walking home from work. She always has a lot to say about her day.

Parents are dead, but we used to ring MIL every day before she went into care and I used to ring my mum every day after my dad died.

None of us live/lived within 100 miles of each other.

I would worry about DD being lonely if she rang several times a day and had no-one else to talk to. She rarely rang when she was a student - mainly if something was wrong.

Singleandproud · 31/12/2023 12:24

My parents live 10 doors away, I normally drop in after the school run for a cup of tea before I spend the day WFH, might pop in at lunchtime too if they are around. They enjoy seeing me as I do them and it's good for me too as otherwise I would spend most of the working week only seeing DD and colleagues on teams.

I've always been conscious that my mum lost hers at a young age and my parents moved us 200 miles away from DDads toxic family so they are quite isolated too.

Zingy123 · 31/12/2023 12:56

I see my DM and both my DC every day face to face.

DobbyRuth · 31/12/2023 13:02

I see her once a week, face to face. Never talk to anyone on the phone/facetime

Sunnydays0101 · 31/12/2023 13:03

Two of my kids are in Uni. I speak to my DD at least once a day, with several texts. Could just a brief call to say good morning, or how did something go, how is X, etc. Just quick chat. Texts are short too. My DS, a quick call once a day.

I guess if you speak/keep in daily contact, you have more to talk about than if only once every few weeks as you know what the other is doing/will be doing and just will be more connected.

minicheddars87 · 31/12/2023 13:06

I speak to my mum on the phone or in person every 2 weeks roughly. Some texts in between too.

I have 4 adult DC, two sons and two daughters. I speak to both my sons probably once a week with some messaging thrown in. Youngest daughter has always been quiet, keep-to-herself type so probably only speak every few weeks but message a lot.

Oldest daughter lives in Tennessee so we don't see each other very often but I probably message her the most of all and we have lots of zoom chats.

ANightmareBeforeChristmas · 31/12/2023 13:08

No DC. I speak to my mum daily on the phone - she calls in the evening. I don't live near enough to visit regularly. We talk for 5 - 10 minutes, it's quite formulaic but I am haunted by thoughts of the day that will come when the phone does not ring at 8pm.

RedRobyn2021 · 31/12/2023 13:09

Most days, if not on the phone we will send a message or a picture

marshmallowfinder · 31/12/2023 13:11

Parents weekly, adult daughter every 2 or 3 weeks with a few WhatsApp messages here and there.

Redglitter · 31/12/2023 13:11

I speak to my Mum several times a day