Alternatives to a traditional Xmas - I’ve realised it just doesn’t work and I don’t enjoy it. What should we do next year?!

[Whatsgoingonwithmyhead]

Me, DH, DC age 5

xmas just doesn’t work.

DC totally overwhelmed, awful awful behaviour, so many tears

Awful for me and DH, we’ll be going back to work exhausted. DC been up at 5am everyday (3 am on Christmas Day) . No opportunity to relax while Dc awake as she’s so full on

No other similar age kids in wider family (a newborn & a teen). Adult relatives made limited effort with DC, causing her to attention seek and behave terribly . Adult relatives don’t look after / entertain DC even for an hour or 30 minutes, so DH and I get no down time.

I wasted £100 on Christmas dinner but didn’t get to enjoy it due to tantrums . Might as well have stuck a couple of pizzas in oven

If you don’t do a traditional Christmas, but still want to make it special, what do you do?

(We don’t have £5- £10k spare to go skiing unfortunately)

Don't tell Dd is is Christmas Eve would prevent quite a bit if this

Cut it down and spread it out.

One advent calendar, one big present from you, one stocking with some nice little bits in. If you want to give something Christmas Eve, something calming like a new story to read at bedtime.

Don't have family over Christmas day, have them over for Boxing Day afternoon, say. Or have them over in smaller groups throughout the week between Christmas and New Year, and ask them to bring any presents for DC with them, not give ahead of time (this is easy to do, say you'd like them to be able to see DC open them). Keep DC in the same routine for stuff like meal times, bed time, getting up as much as possible. And get DC outside a bit if you can (though this last Christmas wasn't great for that.)

We do something along these lines (we have a one year old and a three year old) and it does help them not to get too overwhelmed.