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Original poster

MIL’s lack of food hygiene makes me feel sick

187 replies

sunflowers365 · 27/12/2023 20:26

I’ve just finished a week at my parent in laws for Christmas. My MIL’s food hygiene, and just general cleanliness, makes me feel sick. For context, I have a 15 month old daughter, which makes this more serious for me. She defrosted chicken on the kitchen counter all night. She left my daughter’s turkey bolognaise out on the hob for 5 hours yesterday before it went into the fridge and she reheated it today. She washed raw chicken in the sink today too. They have no hot water in their kitchen. Their kitchen floor is the dirtiest kitchen floor I’ve ever seen in my life- flecked with dried on food all over. The tiles at the back of the hob are greased over with fat. The fridge is full to bursting. The counter tops are strewn with food such as pickles, jams, dried fruits etc. I can’t even use the downstairs shower because I’m terrified of their shower curtain touching me and can’t bear to step on the bath mat. I bring my own flip
flops to wear in their upstairs bathroom. We are sleeping in their bedroom and it smells so musty. The level of dust and clutter is just foul. I love my parents in law but their house and lack of food hygiene disgusts me. Can’t wait to go home!!

OP posts:
Grimchmas · 28/12/2023 00:04

Food hygiene regs for cafes serving things like Sausage rolls are that they can be "cooling" from oven hot to room temperature for 4 hours then refrigerated for up to 24 hours, so cooling at room temperature in winter for 5 hours at home wouldn't bother me.

I defrost overnight out of the fridge too. I presume you'd have had a melt down if you'd have known that I defrosted a chicken for 24 hours in the cool garage for Christmas lunch, and after boiling the carcass up for soup left the pan of chicken broth to cool in the same garage overnight.

suki1964 · 28/12/2023 00:04

OMG, I cant believe Im reading this

As a baby boomer ( guess my age ) we didnt even have a fridge when growing up. Seriously we had a larder with a marble shelf and an air brick. We used to put milk in a bucket of cold water

Are you seriously trying to tell us that they throw pickles and sauces over the counters?

Notthatcatagain · 28/12/2023 00:07

I once saw a shower curtain with about 5 inches of black mould growing up from the bottom, I wouldn't have liked that to touch me, the occupant hadn't realised that it was washable.😂

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Sensibleandboring · 28/12/2023 00:09

Seriously what’s wrong with defrosting something on the worktop?

saraclara · 28/12/2023 00:13

Oh and it’s called a work surface not a ‘counter’, that’s American

It's not American @ActuallyChristmas . I was born in the UK in the '50s and kitchen tops were always called counters. Work surface is a relatively recent term which probably evolved when people started having fitted kitchens.

I use both terms, pretty much randomly.

whiteboardking · 28/12/2023 00:14

There is a lot of paranoia about food which seriously isn't needed. Millions of people don't have freezers / fridges and get by.

ActuallyChristmas · 28/12/2023 00:17

saraclara · 28/12/2023 00:13

Oh and it’s called a work surface not a ‘counter’, that’s American

It's not American @ActuallyChristmas . I was born in the UK in the '50s and kitchen tops were always called counters. Work surface is a relatively recent term which probably evolved when people started having fitted kitchens.

I use both terms, pretty much randomly.

Growing up in the 60s they were work surfaces even before the fitted kitchen

ActuallyChristmas · 28/12/2023 00:19

Notthatcatagain · 28/12/2023 00:07

I once saw a shower curtain with about 5 inches of black mould growing up from the bottom, I wouldn't have liked that to touch me, the occupant hadn't realised that it was washable.😂

In hard water areas, this can easily happen and frequently replacing is the only answer

GoldDuster · 28/12/2023 00:20

OP mentioned general cleanliness as well as food hygeine. Everyone focusing on the defrosting aspect, there's plenty other in the post to back up the fact that the house is dirty enough to make OP not want to stay there, surely?!

ActuallyChristmas · 28/12/2023 00:22

mayorofcasterbridge · 27/12/2023 21:00

Why on earth stay there for a WEEK??

Defrosting the chicken overnight isn't awful. You could have put the turkey bol in the fridge yourself if you were concerned.

You should explain to her that raw chicken should not be rinsed in the sink.

Bring your own bath mat.

Chuck the shower curtain over the side of the bath - I hate them too.

Just out of interest, if you rinse chicken, why? And where?

pickyourown · 28/12/2023 00:27

This sounds like my PILs (I’m here now). House is clean and tidy but the kitchen is so grim! I don’t understand. Food on the floor, washing up done is cold greasy. Unwrapped food in the fridge (which is also filthy, and stinks). 2 days to go…

TheChosenTwo · 28/12/2023 00:30

Defrosting something on the side overnight is quite normal here (I just call it the side, not counter or anything else!). Jars on the side sounds like it could potentially be cluttered but if you don’t have space in the cupboards where else are those things supposed to go?
You should leave plenty of time for things to cool before they go in the fridge.
The greasy tiles and dirty hob do sound dirty. I can’t abide a dirty kitchen floor with bits on and shower curtains make me squeamish. Something about them being wet and slimy and that they always stick to you as though magnetised by static!
Make your excuses and stay elsewhere next time.

pickyourown · 28/12/2023 00:30

forgot to add raw whole chicken on fridge shelf (unwrapped). Can’t understand how dp doesn't comment on it

Icelandic9 · 28/12/2023 00:31

I've always know it as a counter, never heard anyone call it a work surface

I love a good derail

Icelandic9 · 28/12/2023 00:33

ActuallyChristmas · 28/12/2023 00:22

Just out of interest, if you rinse chicken, why? And where?

Show quote history

There's absolutely zero benefits to rinsing a chicken, the only way to kill off any nasties on it is too cook it properly

If you rinse it in the sink you're risking spreading anything harmful around your kitchen. Even worse if you don't have running hot water

YoongiMarryMe · 28/12/2023 00:36

I think you’ll find it’s called the bunker. Keep your fancy worktops/counters away. Grin

Stichintime · 28/12/2023 00:37

People who have homes like this often seem to have many jars of 'preserves' lurking on every surface, cupboard and shelf.

ReflectiveRogue1001 · 28/12/2023 00:40

Are you still alive @sunflowers365?

WhatFlavourIsIt · 28/12/2023 00:41

Did she mix up the porridge on the worktop when she put the sugar in it?.

Saggypants · 28/12/2023 00:42

Oh and it’s called a work surface not a ‘counter’, that’s American

What a twatty response. Are Americans and non-English English speakers allowed on this site? If so are they are allowed to use their own phrasing - which you understood perfectly - or do they have to run it all past you?

Icelandic9 · 28/12/2023 00:44

Saggypants · 28/12/2023 00:42

Oh and it’s called a work surface not a ‘counter’, that’s American

What a twatty response. Are Americans and non-English English speakers allowed on this site? If so are they are allowed to use their own phrasing - which you understood perfectly - or do they have to run it all past you?

It's not even American lol

Islandermummy · 28/12/2023 00:50

I'd say "worktop" I think, but now doubting myself!

I wouldn't like the washing of the chicken in the sink - and it's not recommended. But some cultures think we (i.e. white people) are gross for not washing meat. The key of course if you DO do it is to clean the sink and any bowls used immediately and thoroughly. Sounds like that might not be the case.

As for everything else:

A dirty floor is a bit ew but not really a hygiene risk for cooking and tbh I am definitely not one of those people who sweeps/mops daily...

Defrosting overnight is ok in the U.K. winter. When I lived somewhere hotter I found myself in a quandary about how to do it.

Sounds like you have high standards (no bad thing) If it's really making you uncomfortable I don't think that's your fault or that it's be easy for you to "get over" it. So you're not being unreasonable, but equally you need to find a way to manage it that doesn't insult your in-laws. Could you pre-prep your daughters food in Tupperware and then just microwave it? You could say it's to avoid the burden of cooking for her.

iklboo · 28/12/2023 00:53

Growing up in the 60s they were work surfaces even before the fitted kitchen

Everything is 'the side' in our house. Weirdly we all know which 'side' we mean 😄

letmeeatinpeace · 28/12/2023 01:01

Ugh that does sound gross OP. I’ve had to stay at places like this, and I try to imagine I’m camping / at a festival lol

VivX · 28/12/2023 01:12

iklboo · 28/12/2023 00:53

Growing up in the 60s they were work surfaces even before the fitted kitchen

Everything is 'the side' in our house. Weirdly we all know which 'side' we mean 😄

We call it "the side" too, everything is on the side in the kitchen or on the kitchen side.
(My parents called it a "working top" if buying/replacing it or cleaning it but otherwise I think they called it the side, too)