Anyone had an academic child go down the trades / vocational path?

[rickyrickygrimes]

To not drip feed, we are in France, not the UK.

Here, students generally split between academic and vocational studies at 15. Lycée general is for the more academic, lycée pro is for the more vocational.

DS has always been academic-ish. He's bright, works hard (when he wants to). He goes to one of the best (read most high scoring and academic) lycée general in the country: it just happens to be his catchment lycée so he's got the right to go there anyway, but he does get the marks too.

Increasingly he tells us he doesn't want to go to uni, to do anything academic, he doesn't want to study for umpteen years. he says that he wants to train in a trade, to start earning (lots) of money asap, have his own business - though having said that he doesn't know anyone who has done this. All our family are university educated / professionals. Do any of you have experience of children choosing to go down a vocational route when they could have gone to Uni? How did you feel about it? Are they bored? Do they regret it?

I can't work out my reaction. I can sense my mum clutching her pearls at the very thought of her wonderful, clever, grandson becoming a plumber - and I am doing the same, a bit. It's not my finest moment.

I was that child, though I did get my degree first. But in hindsight, it wasn't "me" and I wasted a lot of time and money.

I now run my own dog-walking business and have never been happier. Please support your son.

my dh was a plumber (not 1 of the millionaire ones mind ) but yes .very much this 😀

I was quite academic in my youth but never settled to one particular area of work until I went into horticulture and realised that was where I should have been all along. Gardening is a trade, an art and a science all at once. A woman I worked for was a university professor and her lodger was coming to the end of his PhD. Nice people, fearfully academic, but utterly useless at anything practical. After working in her garden one day, I had a call from her asking me what I'd done with the garden hose as neither of them could get it to work. There followed questions on connections and kinks in the hose, all to no avail. Eventually I said 'Hold the grey bit and turn the yellow bit' and then heard the 'SSSSHHHHHH' of spraying water. 'Okay, thanks, bye!' she said and hung up.

That's all I have to say about that.

is he the plimico man 😳

Lots of UK based advice here which doesn’t quite work for the French system. I’m all for well paid trades and creative jobs that don’t earn much but it sounds to me like your DS should finish at the current school and take another path later if he wants.

Just remembered this

We can all dream of what we'd want our children to do, but ultimately it's up to them to choose.

My DD has chosen to go to a fairly prestigious dance college. She did well to get in there, and she is living her best life.

She then wants to go onto study dance at uni. The performing arts industry is tough, but she is so far loving it, so I'm happy for her to live her dream.

She has said if it doesn't work out she may train as a paediatric nurse, which,again is fine by me.

Oh, and my dad was a plumber with a successful business which gave us a nice life!

No idea about France sorry, but like others I have a DD who is reasonably bright and could definitely have gone to a good university to do an academic degree if it had been what she'd set her mind on but she wanted to do performing arts and she did. She's now running her own dance school. Is she rich? No! And maybe she never will be, though its not impossible. But she is managing financially and is happy . She loves going to work which is something that not a lot of people can say, so I think it is worth a lot.

I’m an academic and have a traditional white collar job, my DS18 is also academic. He did incredibly well at school and achieved 9 top level GCSEs but had made it clear he didn’t want to be tied to a computer screen, he wanted a role where he was actively ‘doing something’

He is now in his 3rd year as a vehicle technician apprentice. He’s happier than he would have been at college and is learning a skill that will set him up for life. Surely that’s what we’re all hoping for? Happy, independent children that excel in their chosen path whatever that may be

What does he want to do - which trade is he interested in?

How old is your son and what class is he in? I live in France and have 3 adult children.As you know the education system is very different from the Uk.What does he want to be?

The richest person I know owns his own trade company. He started at 17 and is basically semi retired at 46. For context some of my others friends are on 250k salaries so I am talking serious money he had made and some excellent investments made with the money. He is also one of the socially smartest people I have ever met. I have never gone into a room with him anywhere in any context where he could not adapt to the level of conversation in the room in spite of plenty of people in the room being willing to seriously underestimate him.

You should see the most Incredible houses that plumbers and electricians etc live in, in my town in Surrey! If he’s a smart lad then he can build his own business eventually and be highly successful in his trade .

I know plenty of trades people who earn significantly more than ‘professionals’ (if that’s what your worry is!)

I think young people are right to think about whether a degree is worth it. Round here the people in anything related to housing (building, plumbing, electrics) make far more money than the desk bound jobs.

The thing about academia, is that it’ll still be there in 5,10,20,30 years time.
If he has a go at working or an apprenticeship and doesn’t like it, he can go back to Uni when he’s older. And hopefully doing a subject he’s passionate about rather than just doing a degree because it’s expected of him.

My dd is academic and got 7 upwards in her GCSE's.
She was never going to go onto 6th form/college, she hated school.
She is now an apprentice vehicle technician in a garage that specialises in high marque cars.
She is loving it.

As long as she is happy, I couldn't give a hoot if she goes to Uni.

@rickyrickygrimes hey if he becomes a plumber, send him to me!!! cannot get plumbers to come for love nor money in scotland!! he can make a fortune!!

Must admit I am a bit surprised by the parents expressing,or trying to hide,their disappointment that their dcs arent going to uni. Its not the b all and end all.
Highest earner in my 4 siblings is the one who didnt go to uni. He joined the Royal Navy,then did consultancy and now retired at 56 and very comfotably off. Unlike the rest of us,who do have degrees.

Dd1 might use her degree at some point but currently unemployed.
Dd2 earning well as a PA to a high flyer...no relation to her degree. She got involved in his company serving burgers!

Also in France. My DC are brighter than their parents, so it's the other way round here😊. No pressure (except to do something they hopefully enjoy, because they'll be working a long time). Eldest did a BTS en alternance, worked for a year then went to do an extra year (still en alternance) to give him a degree. Youngest in Terminale is being advised by school to do a degree or even go for engineering school, he's thinking about it, but, much like your DS, he's had enough of full-time education and is swerving towards the same path (different course though) than his brother. I have absolutely no preference, just that he does something (as you say, no gap year here). If it's not right for him, he can change courses.

Academic and practical?

That's what gets people owning giant companies making millions.

I have no experience of this as my son is a baby, but I do have experience of using 'posh' middle class electricians and plumbers etc - I think they can get away with charging a little more and get contracts with big developer chains etc based on their social class. I think it's a smart move - I guess I'd want ask my son as well as learning his trade, how does he plan to learn how to run a business (marketing, book keeping, payroll etc)

I also know quite a few academics with degrees that now run businesses doing things like cake making, florestry, interior design, running air bnb, recruiting, estate agent... none of them needed a degree to do these things but university life might have helped them get connections etc that help them with their business

Obviously this is wonderful, but having seen my own dear ballet teacher struggle health-wise in later life because she had lived on a diet of chocolate bars and cigarettes as a professional in the former Eastern bloc and have to spend her ‘retirement’ teaching in grotty village halls, I would worry too. I think she married a man who made enough but he went downhill very quickly after a Parkinson’s diagnosis.

I’m sure things are better now in terms of setting up their health for a lifetime but it is such a short career.

My daughter is perfectly intelligent but school is really difficult for her due to ADHD and autism. At the moment she plans to get a Saturday job at a hairdresser and work her way through an apprenticeship.

I think it'll be much better for her than sitting through years more of academia where she will always struggle.

Does he have to stay in France?