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Original poster

The MN solutions to all problems

134 replies

Wishimaywishimight · 19/12/2023 15:46

LTB (obviously)
A spa day
A bubble bath
A glass of fizz
Posh chocs

For children;
Hot chocolate

I can't think of any more but I am sure there are a few!

OP posts:
LightToTheWorld · 20/12/2023 12:30

To anyone struggling with work-life balance- "cut your shifts"
Short of money- "increase your shifts"

"Grey rock" as a strategy for any tricky communication problem. I saw someone suggest "grey rock" in response to request to take part in a Christmas whip-round the other day.

Friedfriedplantain · 20/12/2023 12:33

Chocolate buttons for potty training and all behavioural training. Comes up more on older threads but always makes me laugh. There's a limit to what my kids will do for a chocolate button.

Wean/night wean at the drop of a hat for any problem related or unrelated.

Go to your GP. Said to people who are already under care that's progressed far beyond that point.

Leave the kids with DH for a day and see how he copes - said to people with criminally negligent fathers for partners.

The marriage is clearly over - if anyone ever raises their voice or swears. People on here must be so fucking zen compared to the ones I know.

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:39

Just booking yourself into a hotel for the night and leaving a useless dg we the kids... Yeah, okay

PuppyMonkey · 20/12/2023 12:41

Get an air fryer. Or Gousto. Or a dehumidifier. Or a Lakeland heated airer.Grin

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:43

Turn off the WiFi. Has anybody ever actual done this in reality?Doubt it.

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:45

Asking for advice on the Internet concerning a seriously ill sounding adult /child who you should really get to hospital asap rather than asking advice on MN.

theveryhungrybum · 20/12/2023 12:46

Batch cook
Style it out
Go NC

Highlighta · 20/12/2023 12:50

Teenage son is out of control, got with the wrong crowd , disrespects me and is now smoking weed and drunk half the day... WWYD

Get him assessed for ADHD.

My daughter is 16 and got a spray tan and unfortunately the sheets are now stained. Any tips to get the marks out?

What!!!!!! Why are you doing washing for your 16 year old!. She is an adult and should be doing her own washing, cook 3 meals a day, walk the dog, and have a job. I hope you are not paying for the tan. She's just using you OP. Grow a pair and throw her out.

Mrsjayy · 20/12/2023 12:51

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:43

Turn off the WiFi. Has anybody ever actual done this in reality?Doubt it.

I used to at night granted this was before unlimited data contracts my Dc wouldn't want to use their data.

Digestivechocolatebiscuit · 20/12/2023 12:52

I don't have a bath .
I don't drink alcohol.
I'm not one for
But give me chocolate!!!
Once just before l had a nervous breakdown ( had a few) and waiting to be assessed.. a CPN ( one of those nurses supposed to help with MH).. . I was feeling so bad.. said to me in a patronising voice " Have you tried a hot bath and some candles lit"
I mean l was admitted to the psychiatric hospital same day.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 20/12/2023 12:55

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:39

Just booking yourself into a hotel for the night and leaving a useless dg we the kids... Yeah, okay

That one belongs in a sitcom rather than real life. I wonder if anyone on here who recommends it has ever done it and had it solve anything.

Riapia · 20/12/2023 12:55

If someone knocks on your door at 2am you must answer it.

guineverehadgreeneyes · 20/12/2023 13:11

Use your words.
Just pop a Camembert in the oven.

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 13:16

Riapia · 20/12/2023 12:55

If someone knocks on your door at 2am you must answer it.

Conversely, you must never ever answer the door at an time whatsoever if you're not expecting anyone to call.

AutumnCrow · 20/12/2023 13:19

Oh god yes, all the 'popping' and 'bunging' things in the oven. I've got a damaged spine and I'm not going to bunging anything anywhere any time soon.

I just want to know if I can microwave a pepper without it blowing up.

And no I won't be 'grazing' or 'munching' or 'gobbling it down'. I thought I might sit and eat it.

EtiennePalmiere · 20/12/2023 13:30

Opening a window for any housekeeping issue, putting a note through the letterbox for any neighbour issue, saying no as a complete sentence, trinny makeup or skin+me.

EtiennePalmiere · 20/12/2023 13:36

SquashPenguin · 20/12/2023 10:53

Expensive mortgage? Just sell your house. Problem solved overnight.

Or just get a higher paying job

MeinKraft · 20/12/2023 13:46

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:45

Asking for advice on the Internet concerning a seriously ill sounding adult /child who you should really get to hospital asap rather than asking advice on MN.

Conversely, 'I've had a sore toe for 3 days what should I do' will be met with A&E NOW

flowerchild2000 · 20/12/2023 13:50

No matter how small or inane the issue,

Leave him!!

flowerchild2000 · 20/12/2023 13:51

Bbq1 · 20/12/2023 12:43

Turn off the WiFi. Has anybody ever actual done this in reality?Doubt it.

It's a solid threat tho

Aroundthewaygirl · 20/12/2023 13:54

Go for a walk outside (to solve depression symptoms)

Shadowsindarkplaces · 20/12/2023 13:54

24 Yr old is being aggressive and nasty, room a tip, MN- they are still young, are they ND? Clean their room for them.
13 Yr old has tantrum because favourite t shirts are not clean, MN - They know where the washing machine is, why are they not doing it themselves.

dancingdec · 20/12/2023 13:55

'Penis beaker, naice ham, etc' = I have been on here for decades, am a fully-fledged member of the MN clique and know everything

PrincessHoneysuckle · 20/12/2023 13:57

Add salad preferably a big one ro any meal to counteract the unhealthy poisons.

E.g pizza and salad
Kinder egg and salad

Mojolostforever · 20/12/2023 13:58

Make everyone respect your boundaries, no matter how batshit they are.

Don't let anyone see your new baby until he/she is a teenager.

Don't let anyone know your new baby's name until he's ready for school.

Go NC with your whole family and most of the neighbours.

Make sure DH does 50% of housework, child care, and the mental load. So what if he works from 4 in the morning to 10 at night, he's a lazy cocklodger.